Count me as another snobby parent but I've never put a tablet in front of my kid at dinner. We also don't have our phones at the table at home and always eat dinner as a family so I think that makes eating out a lot easier because we have consistent expectations at home and at restaurants. We eat out maybe once or twice a month, she's used to being entertained by eating, pretending to read the menu, coloring and taking walks. At home she is expected to stay at the table and eat dinner and then she can ask to be excused.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And this is why I frequently see older children and preteens with tablets at restaurants. I find it horrifying. Learn to be a human.

Good for you, OP.

My parents let us bring books and read them while waiting to eat, but we had to put them away when the food came. Is that better, worse, the same? Until I was in high school and had too much homework I always had a book in hand. My mom used to yell at me for reading while walking down the sidewalk.

My parents had to Institute a no books at the table rule when we are eating as a family, but it was fair game if we were eating lunch or breakfast on the weekends and everyone was fending for themselves.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with you OP. I have a baby and a 3 year old and we don't do ipads at restaurants, etc. We are not anti screen but I don't like screens at meals or other social gatherings. That being said, sitting at a restaurant with a bunch of toddlers sounds kinda awful. Maybe next time pick an indoor playground where moms can sit with coffees and the kids have a place to move around.

Again, we had an hour to kill while the kids were at a camp and went to a local dive diner for some breakfast.

I don’t think eating out should be COMPLETELY off the table for get togethers. It was super casual with incredibly low expectations for food and behavior. But I still don’t think toddlers should have iPads at the table.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with you OP. I have a baby and a 3 year old and we don't do ipads at restaurants, etc. We are not anti screen but I don't like screens at meals or other social gatherings. That being said, sitting at a restaurant with a bunch of toddlers sounds kinda awful. Maybe next time pick an indoor playground where moms can sit with coffees and the kids have a place to move around.

+1

I agree with you OP. I have a baby and a 3 year old and we don't do ipads at restaurants, etc. We are not anti screen but I don't like screens at meals or other social gatherings. That being said, sitting at a restaurant with a bunch of toddlers sounds kinda awful. Maybe next time pick an indoor playground where moms can sit with coffees and the kids have a place to move around.

This is awesome that OP is holding out on introducing electronics. I recommend to hold out as long as you can. Electronic games are addicting and it has become a battle to get my kids off of them.

At 18mo I could bring my child out to eat and he would happily check out his surroundings and eat, while allowing time for us to eat.

Fast forward six months and now we start with the usual distractions and eating, but if I want to actually eat a meal or visit at all, then out comes the phone with apps. Ability to sit and chill or be easily entertained has decreased dramatically. We now get about 30mins, at best. Their need to be on the go increases a ton in the next several months.

I have a five year d and we eat out at least two sometimes three times a week and I can count on one hand the number of times I let her have a screen at the table. It’s rude. Don’t atart the habit. Especially at that age. I bring wiki sticks, markers, K leave activity books. She doesn’t even ask for iPad. Jesus people this isn’t that hard. Toddlers are a pain, I know, so shorten the visit or don’t bring the kid. I can’t belive the snark from some of the posters. Parent your kid. You are on the right track OP. I am appalled at older kids playing on phones and iPads at the table too. It’s rude AF and you need to teach your kids how to act.

My neighbor who is a teacher says she sees the effects now. Children who can't soothe themselves. She said there is a huge difference between now and 3-5 years ago. She said it used to be 2-3 kids who couldn't cope, now it is more than half the class. And that students are crying more frequently and they are at an age where they should have moved beyond that response to a difficult situation.

A phone, book or tablet, I find it rude when people are on them at meals with other people. What happened to having a conversation?

As for the toddlers, this is just how life is now. Screens are great babysitters and when you find something that works, it becomes the go to. I was just watching a documentary on how so much screen time / social media is changing the social fabric of society and people are becoming more and more programmed. I think it will be another couple decades before we really know the effects of growing up with a screen in front of you all the time.

You should know better as a STM that 2-3yo are more tough to handle than your 18mo and that other toddlers may not be as laid back as yours! Your time to eat humble pie will come soon enough just check teens section if you need preview ? Meanwhile enjoy the screen free time with your toddler!

Eh. Everything that is said about tablets/phones was also said about kids reading books. People thought books were bad for children, and that they should sit and eat a meal without any distractions (books, crayons, toys) at all. Yet somehow the human race continues to survive.

We rarely let DD use tablets or phones in public, but I’m not going to judge someone who does. I’m sure they would judge me right back for some of my choices.

Also, I believe that for many parents, having a break to be an adult allows them to then give 100% of their focused attention to their kid the rest of the time. I think that’s probably better than having no screens but a checked-out parent. I’m sure there are some parents who can give their full attention to their child 24/7, and that’s great for them, but it’s also okay for moms to want an hour or two of adult interaction.

I never brought electronic devices to entertain my kids at restaurants or other venues. I didn't want to teach them that it's o.k. to tune other people at the table out like that.

Most restaurants have crayons and coloring sheets for the kids. Those are a bit more interactive and everyone at the table can see what the child has colored and talk about it.

Anonymous wrote:And this is why I frequently see older children and preteens with tablets at restaurants. I find it horrifying. Learn to be a human.

Good for you, OP.

My parents let us bring books and read them while waiting to eat, but we had to put them away when the food came. Is that better, worse, the same? Until I was in high school and had too much homework I always had a book in hand. My mom used to yell at me for reading while walking down the sidewalk.

Anonymous wrote:My kid is still young (18months), but I have a question about tablets. Did you all buy dedicated tablets for your toddlers? Are they kid tablets? I don’t own an iPad and neither does DH, but does every other person in this area?

Assuming we are talking strictly tablets, no, we don't own one and I would never buy one for a child unless it was needed for school. (I have a 4.5 year old and a 15 month old.) However, DH and I both have iphones and the 4 year old gets to watch about 15 minutes of kids songs on it at bedtime. This started as a potty training incentive and, sadly, has never died since it can be useful while I put the younger one to bed. We endeavor not to use the iphone as a pacifier in restaurants, doctors' offices, etc, but on occasion we have done so -- like the time the food at a restaurant was delayed by 45 minutes (fun meal) or the time we took DS for a very important dr appointment and had to concentrate 100% on what the dr was saying.

That said, we don't eat out much. DS is finally able to behave pretty well in a restaurant if it's breakfast or lunch, but he has been a picky eater since he first started solids and it's not worth taking him to the restaurants we really want to eat at (Thai, Indian, Vietnamese, etc) because he won't touch anything, even rice, and I don't enjoy dealing with that. And I have no interest in eating at kids' restaurants outside of the occasional IHOP lunch.

15 month old DD thus far eats anything and is a dream in restaurants so long as she either has food or is on my lap. Go figure.