Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:51     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Thank,you for that advice. I will not use that DS shorthand any more, as I do not want to confuse anyone into thinking I am Jocasta, and my dear spouse Oedipus.

It might be more interesting if you were.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:50     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Golf guy here. I just opened the door and told her. At the time I didn't think AP and her knew each other but we later found out they share a hairdresser and a cleaning lady. You never know how small your world is until the explodes. We actually went golfing (ex and i) the next day and just had a long 10 hour convo. We decided that day to end it. We didn't do the "i think I can get over this" dance.


Why wouldn’t you just have not opened the door?
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:42     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Thank,you for that advice. I will not use that DS shorthand any more, as I do not want to confuse anyone into thinking I am Jocasta, and my dear spouse Oedipus.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:40     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Mine had a change in music as well during affair. When someone goes from KennyG type stuff to Eminem you notice
Went with the dressing different, dying hair, lots of overtime yet less money, coffee replacing tea and other small changes.


I wrote the long post above. I forgot to mention that in addition to the 12 pound weight loss, and change in musical tastes, my dear spouse also upgraded their style of dress.


Me again. Yes, I also assumed it was a mid-life crisis. My dear spouse even said as much, and I encouraged and praised all of these positive changes. DS was many months into this all-consuming affair before I discovered different.


I'm fine with your gender neutral post, but on this forum "DS" means "Dear Son." So maybe just spell it out.


+1000 "DEAR SON"?!? Just spell out spouse. Your posts about your son are confusing.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:34     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Mine had a change in music as well during affair. When someone goes from KennyG type stuff to Eminem you notice
Went with the dressing different, dying hair, lots of overtime yet less money, coffee replacing tea and other small changes.


I wrote the long post above. I forgot to mention that in addition to the 12 pound weight loss, and change in musical tastes, my dear spouse also upgraded their style of dress.


Me again. Yes, I also assumed it was a mid-life crisis. My dear spouse even said as much, and I encouraged and praised all of these positive changes. DS was many months into this all-consuming affair before I discovered different.


I'm fine with your gender neutral post, but on this forum "DS" means "Dear Son." So maybe just spell it out.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:31     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Warning to everyone on the precipice of a mid-life crisis:

Your spouse is going to think you're cheating because of your change in music/clothing/food to fight off feeling old.


Or . . . Often if it looks like fish, smells like fish, and tastes like fish, your hubby is enjoying himself some fish!
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:28     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Mine had a change in music as well during affair. When someone goes from KennyG type stuff to Eminem you notice
Went with the dressing different, dying hair, lots of overtime yet less money, coffee replacing tea and other small changes.


I wrote the long post above. I forgot to mention that in addition to the 12 pound weight loss, and change in musical tastes, my dear spouse also upgraded their style of dress.


Me again. Yes, I also assumed it was a mid-life crisis. My dear spouse even said as much, and I encouraged and praised all of these positive changes. DS was many months into this all-consuming affair before I discovered different.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:21     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Mine had a change in music as well during affair. When someone goes from KennyG type stuff to Eminem you notice
Went with the dressing different, dying hair, lots of overtime yet less money, coffee replacing tea and other small changes.


I wrote the long post above. I forgot to mention that in addition to the 12 pound weight loss, and change in musical tastes, my dear spouse also upgraded their style of dress.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:20     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Warning to everyone on the precipice of a mid-life crisis:

Your spouse is going to think you're cheating because of your change in music/clothing/food to fight off feeling old.


I assumed mid-life crisis at first, and did not worry much at all. He was comfortably cheating for just over a year, before I figured out it went beyond a mid-life crisis.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:17     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Warning to everyone on the precipice of a mid-life crisis:

Your spouse is going to think you're cheating because of your change in music/clothing/food to fight off feeling old.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 13:14     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Mine had a change in music as well during affair. When someone goes from KennyG type stuff to Eminem you notice
Went with the dressing different, dying hair, lots of overtime yet less money, coffee replacing tea and other small changes.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 12:24     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Did they use GPS, software on your phone, or follow you? Did they hire a PI, or have a friend follow you? Voice activated recorder?


Can't conceive going thru all that mess just to catch somebody. Soon as it gets to the point where I'm that suspicious and seriously considering using GPS software or hiring a PI to monitor somebody's whereabouts - that's it.
Don't matter if they cheating or not the simple fact that they have me so unsettled is all the proof I need to call it quits. Trust gone relationship over. Not about to spend my life sniffing around everything somebody says and does like a police dog in order to fully trust them. That's not my idea of a good relationship so for their sake and my sake I'd suggest we shut it down and go our separate ways - sanity over sanctity.


You might be surprised.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 11:37     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:Did they use GPS, software on your phone, or follow you? Did they hire a PI, or have a friend follow you? Voice activated recorder?


Can't conceive going thru all that mess just to catch somebody. Soon as it gets to the point where I'm that suspicious and seriously considering using GPS software or hiring a PI to monitor somebody's whereabouts - that's it.
Don't matter if they cheating or not the simple fact that they have me so unsettled is all the proof I need to call it quits. Trust gone relationship over. Not about to spend my life sniffing around everything somebody says and does like a police dog in order to fully trust them. That's not my idea of a good relationship so for their sake and my sake I'd suggest we shut it down and go our separate ways - sanity over sanctity.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 11:24     Subject: Re:For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
Anonymous wrote:
A coworker got caught when her texts to AP were found by the other woman. The AP and OW were friends of coworker and her DH. The OW went to coworker's house and beat the tar out of her. Put her in the hospital. Another time, the same coworker got caught when the guy she was sending nude pics to showed his DW. I'm sure they weren't sent out of the blue, but apparently he had a crisis of conscience. Again, it was a couple they WERE friends with until the OW found out. Coworker is a beautiful, but deeply troubled Narcissist.


PP here who posted the coworker story above. Sorry for confusion and sorry to disappoint. Coworker is a woman and the other woman (OW) was her AP's wife who discovered the texts, and throws a mean punch too, as it turns out. I learned about all of the above during my own brief EAP with coworker. While she's incredibly attractive, I couldn't deal with the Narcissistic abuse.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2018 11:03     Subject: For Cheaters Who Were Caught Red Handed.
I know several gay men who appreciate receiving flowers as a gift, and at least one straight man as well.