Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what this has to do with liberalism. My politics are very much on the left but I know conservatives who would get it and liberals like OP, who don't. Sometimes I feel like people hide their most intolerant views behind "But I'm a liberal so its OK."

"Sometimes" you feel that way? How about, all the time, this is how liberals think?

How about you not hijack a thread in order to grind your personal political ax?

Anonymous wrote:I have no doubt that what you say is true and well-intended, but exactly none of it is relevant to the OP's situation in an independent school where not-violent kids are the issue.

Set up a time to talk to her about it.

1) We had a kid in my son's class who used to smack the teacher. She had no voice in the situation until WE said that our child was anxious about his teacher's safety. (He was.)

2) We had a teacher last year who had 4 kids with SNs, but only 1 was diagnosed. Parents crucified her for using alternative techniques to meet the needs of all of the kids. Some of the parents whose kids were struggling the most were the most vocal about her strategies. When the kids were finally tested, and found to have things like dyslexia, nobody went back and said, "Sorry. NO wonder you spend so much time reading aloud and providing outlines and study guides." They accused her of dumbing down. Meanwhile, everyone's overall scores went up that year on the standardized tests.

Just ask her about the strategy, why she does it, and if she's concerned. Also, tell her your concerns. YOu can ask for a pacing guide. NO, you can't. Some teachers review more at the beginning so they don't have to reteach in November. YOU MEAN, 'reteach before standardized tests', which don't occur in independent schools

If she's a professional she should not be threatened by your question. OP doesn't care about the "why" -- the answer is obvious, and the result is the problem here: the technique makes scholastic life miserable for everyone but the two kids who require this technique

-A teacher/mom.

My point was sometimes the teacher is put in a position to use a strategy that isn't so effective to try to meet 1 kid's needs, and if parents don't point out the impact it has on their kids, the teacher is in a bind and looks like she is not a team player.

Also, some private schools DO use standardized tests (just not the same ones on public school) but that wasn't my point.

Thanks for telling me what I was talking about and deciding my intentions, then calling me out for being on the wrong track.
In doing so, you made my point.

If you assume you know why something is unfolding without asking a thoughtful question, you get to be indignant and angry. Congrats, if that is what you are going for!

If you ask why, you may not like the answer but you can make an informed decision, and can potentially advocate for your own child.

If you child is advanced, not average, and average-paced class isn't going to work, anyway.

It sounds like the teacher is not differentiating up, and that is worth a discussion.

Like the parent who said technology would help a certain child, a private school should make learning accessible to those with documented disabilities (an accommodation). A general education teacher who is using special education teaching strategies (if that is what is happening) without the oversight/co-teaching of a special education teacher is at a huge disadvantage, and is being asked to be 2 people.

At my child's school, we have 2 tiers in some subjects, and have part time staff who help the high flyers soar, and then have co-taught support for the kids who struggle. We also have after school mentoring programs and many parents use tutors.

It isn't quite fair to anyone to use 1 approach for everyone, but again, it is worth 20 minutes to ask about it, face to face.

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what this has to do with liberalism. My politics are very much on the left but I know conservatives who would get it and liberals like OP, who don't. Sometimes I feel like people hide their most intolerant views behind "But I'm a liberal so its OK."

"Sometimes" you feel that way? How about, all the time, this is how liberals think?

^sorry, hit send too soon.

I felt badly knowing someone else's child was still back where he had been, and was stuck with the same issues, but k had to advocate for my child. It was not a good situation, and I was torn in complaining knowing the students who needed the aides were getting the services they needed, but it was causing a problem for the rest of the kids, and my child didn't even know he was actually supposed to be able to hear his teacher all the time!

Our experience was similar in public school, and we moved to private.
My 1st grader was in a classroom that had one child bouncing on a ball all day, and 2 aides dedicated to 2 children that carries on conversations with them during the main teacher instruction.
I couldn't believe when I saw my child straining to listen to his teacher while trying to block out 2 separate conversations on either side of him and someone bouncing up and down in front of him. It was chaos. It was loud. I know I couldn't work like that!

He actually told me "it's ok mommy, I can hear most of what she says, and sometimes the aides don't talk as loud."

I had him moved to the front row for the remainder of the year, knowing that meant someone else's child (children) were stuck in the back where he had been.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what this has to do with liberalism. My politics are very much on the left but I know conservatives who would get it and liberals like OP, who don't. Sometimes I feel like people hide their most intolerant views behind "But I'm a liberal so its OK."

It's very simple. Conservatives feel the rights of person A do not trump the rights of person B, because we have individual rights, not group rights.

When a whole classroom is slowed down because of person A, the special needs child, you are doing it at the cost of person B, the OP's child.

I don't know why SN parents would think Ted Cruz would support this, or any conservative for that matter. Ted Cruz would be for finding a way to help person A without person B paying a price for it.

Actually, it's not that simple, and I say that as a conservative myself. Yes, conservatism exalts individual rights over group rights, but this does not imply that we do not help each other out, even at some cost to ourselves. It's a parody of conservatism to say that it precludes helping out those in one's community who are less fortunate.

I agree with the posters who noted that political labels are essentially useless in this kind of situation. OP's concerns don't make her illiberal, and no strong correlation should be expected between people's political allegiances and how they would react to this situation. There's an ample body of research showing that our political attachments are as much a function of tribal habit as they are of actual philosophical differences (witness the famous survey in recent years in which R's and D's either favored/opposed the exact same health care proposal depending on whether it was labeled a Republican or Democratic one).

In a situation like this political labels are a hindrance to understanding one another, not an aid. I'd encourage OP to just deal with the situation and not worry about what it signals about her political philosophy.

Anonymous wrote:OP: I thought the 5th and 6th grades were very important ones. My kids sat around and waited for the class to catch up for years in public. The teacher was always giving my DC tutoring duty with the SN kids. It was very frustrating. Without worrying about the other students (your DC is your issue/ responsibility) we moved to private and never looked back. Best thing we ever did. We interviewed at privates that were very slow and inclusive like this -- it just was not he place for our child. Ask around if you can move right away. The year has just started.

Yes this. The school is what it is. It may be working for the majority of the children there. It is not working for your child. Find a school with a better fit.

OP: I thought the 5th and 6th grades were very important ones. My kids sat around and waited for the class to catch up for years in public. The teacher was always giving my DC tutoring duty with the SN kids. It was very frustrating. Without worrying about the other students (your DC is your issue/ responsibility) we moved to private and never looked back. Best thing we ever did. We interviewed at privates that were very slow and inclusive like this -- it just was not he place for our child. Ask around if you can move right away. The year has just started.