Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Current marriage: 6 years. DH doesn't initiate and rejects advances. He's not having an affair. Says family life is too stressful. 4 kids, 3 teenagers. Been married 17 years next September. It's pretty soul crushing. We're both in decent shape and attractive. I think people would be pretty shocked to look at us. I'm very affectionate with him--he is tepid to cold in response. Most days I feel like I'm just walking under water.
You're a better woman than I am. In your shoes, I had a long term affair (which I do not regret for one minute).
I too feel this way and am beginning to look for a "relief valve"
Another DW here too with a DH who almost never initiates even after multiple conversations about it. Am currently on a multiweek, overseas business trip with a single, attractive male colleague and have to fight the urge to knock on his door every night. Am pretty sure I will ask for a separation before the end of the year. I hate living wih little to no affection on a daily basis. We have two kids under 6. Sucks. ?
You're thinking about initiating with another man because your husband doesn't initiate?
Is there a "men are supposed to initiate" double standard? Should there be?
(But, regardless, I recognize that it sucks to do 90 - 100% of the initiating regardless of gender; makes you feel like your spouse is just putting up with it rather than actively desiring you.)