Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in therapy. We talked about it this morning. She suggested I talk to him about wanting to date and let that sink in for a while.

?????????????

This makes not one iota of sense. A real therapist suggested that you talk to a controlling ex of ten years about you wanting to date??

I'm out. You're making this up as you go along.

Agree. This post isn't real or OP is just blatantly lying. Done.

Anonymous wrote:I am in therapy. We talked about it this morning. She suggested I talk to him about wanting to date and let that sink in for a while.

?????????????

This makes not one iota of sense. A real therapist suggested that you talk to a controlling ex of ten years about you wanting to date??

I'm out. You're making this up as you go along.

I am in therapy. We talked about it this morning. She suggested I talk to him about wanting to date and let that sink in for a while.

Anonymous wrote:A PP here - I will make one last point and then I am out.

OP, the issue is NOT that your ex does not want you to date.

The issue is that your ex is emotionally holding you hostage. He KNOWS that his temper unhinges you and he uses it as a tool to manipulate you. My ex was the same way. I have issues about the phone, but this is your major issue. If you can somehow develop the resolve to make yourself immune to his temper, your life will ultimately improve.

GL

Agree. And therapy will likely help you develop this resolve.

A PP here - I will make one last point and then I am out.

OP, the issue is NOT that your ex does not want you to date.

The issue is that your ex is emotionally holding you hostage. He KNOWS that his temper unhinges you and he uses it as a tool to manipulate you. My ex was the same way. I have issues about the phone, but this is your major issue. If you can somehow develop the resolve to make yourself immune to his temper, your life will ultimately improve.

GL

Wow. You are a world class bitch. And that's saying something with this crowd.

Moving on...

I'm not making excuses. I've tried to explain what is actually happening and wondering why people are offering advice that has nothing to do with the situation or reality.

It's frustrating to be accused of lying and stirring up drama when I've already explained most of it. Instead of posting a bitchy comment, why don't you just read the thread?

Also, just an idea, if someone is really having a hard time, insulting them and giving "tips" that don't have anything to do with reality are going to overshadow whatever tidbits of good advice you offer. I did respond to some good advice here. If you'd read the thread, you'd know that already.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you guys are acting like you're still married. Sharing a family cell phone plan? You're NOT a family anymore. Get your own plan. Change the password on your email and don't tell him what your new password is.

How you handled money should have changed when you divorced. If he feels that acting like you're divorced when you're divorced means you're hiding something, that's too bad. As for "hell to pay", you need to stand up for yourself and stop letting this man control and abuse you.

OP is still not over him. I thought otherwise until this family plan BS. You all are not a family anymore.

It's cheaper. It was a lot cheaper years ago. He pays the bill for all 3 of our bills in lieu of his full half of childcare costs. I don't understand why it's so unbelievable. I'll have to pay the early termination fee to switch it over. That's a few hundred dollars that I'd rather not spend on nothing. The tracfone makes more financial sense.

OK, so get the tracofone. Don't use the cell phone he pays for and let the contract expire. He won't see your cell phone use anymore.

She says she doesnt pay the phone bill yet she's worried about an early termination fee. Riiiiight. OP could just never turn the phone back on while ex pays and get a new pay-as-you-go phone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait, if he doesn't know about the boyfriend, then what the hell was the whole point of this post?

Try reading the thread.

Needing more attention. I think those of us who were trying to be helpful are wasting our thoughts/concerns on OP. Don't save her. She don't wanna be saved.

That's what I'm starting to think too. Oh well, I tried to offer some tips and advice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait, if he doesn't know about the boyfriend, then what the hell was the whole point of this post?

Try reading the thread.

Needing more attention. I think those of us who were trying to be helpful are wasting our thoughts/concerns on OP. Don't save her. She don't wanna be saved.

by offering

OP,

When is the last time you researched cell phone options? T-Mobile has changed the game buy offering to buy out folks with Verizon and ATT contracts.

Even if it costs to switch, the price of freedom is immeasurable.

This enmeshed existence cannot be good for your children. It's not good for you. Why continue it?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you guys are acting like you're still married. Sharing a family cell phone plan? You're NOT a family anymore. Get your own plan. Change the password on your email and don't tell him what your new password is.

How you handled money should have changed when you divorced. If he feels that acting like you're divorced when you're divorced means you're hiding something, that's too bad. As for "hell to pay", you need to stand up for yourself and stop letting this man control and abuse you.

OP is still not over him. I thought otherwise until this family plan BS. You all are not a family anymore.

It's cheaper. It was a lot cheaper years ago. He pays the bill for all 3 of our bills in lieu of his full half of childcare costs. I don't understand why it's so unbelievable. I'll have to pay the early termination fee to switch it over. That's a few hundred dollars that I'd rather not spend on nothing. The tracfone makes more financial sense.

OK, so get the tracofone. Don't use the cell phone he pays for and let the contract expire. He won't see your cell phone use anymore.

Anonymous wrote:Wait, if he doesn't know about the boyfriend, then what the hell was the whole point of this post?

Try reading the thread.

You sound lovely OP. People have taken time to give you some really good advice and in that advice is the encouragement to seek therapy to gain some self esteem that will help you be done with this asshole. Instead you just fight them and are rude.