Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was in my 20s, I dated a lot of different men, including men in their late 30s and early 40s. You're right that they had something to offer. They had the maturity to send flowers and call to thank me for a date. Lots of it was money--they liked to take me shopping, to nice restaurants, always drove, sprung for hotels. Usually were very experienced and considerate in bed, well traveled, liked to take trips and pay my way.

But seriously, they in no way could compete physically with the hot 20 something guys. Their stuff just starts to droop around 33, they lose weight in their chest, get weird hairs and skinny legs.

And I agree with PPs that your double standard for your daughter versus women you date as well as your nasty comments about older women being angry show that you are in fact sexist. Which is the exact opposite of someone who loves women.

funny, i've never been bigger or stronger. legs full and developed and chest too. four days a week in the gym year after year will do that for a guy.

guys that let themselves go definitely do...go.

i dont do coke, i dont party and i dont take anyone shopping.

sounds like you were a lovely user of other people.

and with regards to my daughter - what dad wouldnt want her daughter to remain chaste as possible and to marry when her value is highest to the highest possible value man?

of course if i said it the way everyone else does it wont sound so crazy- dont sleep around and save for yourself for the right guy!

and finally, only my experience in dealing with older angry/confused/bitter/scared women i.e. the mid - late - 30's mateless in dc, informs my opinion. its solely from experience.

How come you didn't answer the question about what country you come from? Your points about wanting your daughter to remain chaste as well as your obsession with the relative value of everything is telling.

Did I really just read that at age 40 a woman can look good but can't really be desirable?? Wtf??

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

+1 You view both men and women as commodities to be bought and sold, not as human beings.

um, hardly.

people enter into an exchange when they have a relationship. an exchange of time, energy, care, concern, affection, whatever.

most people also seek to make that exchange with someone that they deem as worthy of themselves. i.e. "their type"

it usually all works subconsciously and even when you admit it out loud it comes out differently.

have you ever heard a woman describe a new guy she just met by stating his occupation, educational pedigree and background?

well, there you go, its a natural thing we all do.

have you ever seen a couple and thought, what in the world is she doing with that guy? she could do so much better!

exactly.

its not wrong of me to be aware of it, it is just is.

Just curious, OP, are you a fan of Ayn Rand? Why do I suspect you are?

Anonymous wrote:When I was in my 20s, I dated a lot of different men, including men in their late 30s and early 40s. You're right that they had something to offer. They had the maturity to send flowers and call to thank me for a date. Lots of it was money--they liked to take me shopping, to nice restaurants, always drove, sprung for hotels. Usually were very experienced and considerate in bed, well traveled, liked to take trips and pay my way.

But seriously, they in no way could compete physically with the hot 20 something guys. Their stuff just starts to droop around 33, they lose weight in their chest, get weird hairs and skinny legs.

And I agree with PPs that your double standard for your daughter versus women you date as well as your nasty comments about older women being angry show that you are in fact sexist. Which is the exact opposite of someone who loves women.

funny, i've never been bigger or stronger. legs full and developed and chest too. four days a week in the gym year after year will do that for a guy.

guys that let themselves go definitely do...go.

i dont do coke, i dont party and i dont take anyone shopping.

sounds like you were a lovely user of other people.

and with regards to my daughter - what dad wouldnt want her daughter to remain chaste as possible and to marry when her value is highest to the highest possible value man?

of course if i said it the way everyone else does it wont sound so crazy- dont sleep around and save for yourself for the right guy!

and finally, only my experience in dealing with older angry/confused/bitter/scared women i.e. the mid - late - 30's mateless in dc, informs my opinion. its solely from experience.

When I was in my 20s, I dated a lot of different men, including men in their late 30s and early 40s. You're right that they had something to offer. They had the maturity to send flowers and call to thank me for a date. Lots of it was money--they liked to take me shopping, to nice restaurants, always drove, sprung for hotels. Usually were very experienced and considerate in bed, well traveled, liked to take trips and pay my way.

But seriously, they in no way could compete physically with the hot 20 something guys. Their stuff just starts to droop around 33, they lose weight in their chest, get weird hairs and skinny legs. It's just not the same. But of course you could overlook that for someone who knew the band, or was in the band (!) or had coke and bought rounds and rounds of drinks for your friends. But the girl's friends are always secretly like, "you brought your Dad again!"

So basically, I would say that your days as being successful with 24 year olds are numbered unless you are massively rich.

And I agree with PPs that your double standard for your daughter versus women you date as well as your nasty comments about older women being angry show that you are in fact sexist. Which is the exact opposite of someone who loves women.

Are you from another country? This BS about feminized men sounds like super macho crap I have heard from Egyptian, Brazilian or Russian men.

Fortunately, my dating days are long behind me--I married a handsome geeky engineer who's only a few months older than me!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:your argument also breaks down because you said that a first tier woman wouldnt date me because she is husband minded.

but then you just said these people you mentioned weren't husband minded but somehow got snatched up and married.

which is it?


and did you see who jolie married at 25? cripes! a 45 year old!

she was also married right before that - so maybe, just maybe she was interested in being married

your argument is falling apart all over the place

Jolie in her early twenties married Johnny Lee Miller who is about 40 now (i am too lazy to check). btw, I find him the most desirable of all her husbands.

The first tier woman is not going to fall in love with you.. A, because you are too old, B, because you are divorced and have kids and C, she has so many options, she will fall with someone where she doesn't need to compromise (in respect to his age, kids etc). Sooner or later she will encounter a full package eager to reciprocate her affections and fall for it.

i know you keep saying this but I know in my experience this isn't the case.

my current girlfriend is twelve years younger, absolutely gorgeous (as in everyone always always say something about it, not just in my mind), graduated from a top 20 university, has a great job, comes from real wealth, cooks, is sweet, and loves to fuck. no psychological issues, comes from an intact family household, and is the most even keeled and stable woman i've likely ever known. and yet she loves me deeply and wants kids with me.

i'm not sure how much better your check list is to make her "First tier", aside from being famous.

Anonymous wrote:your argument also breaks down because you said that a first tier woman wouldnt date me because she is husband minded.

but then you just said these people you mentioned weren't husband minded but somehow got snatched up and married.

which is it?


and did you see who jolie married at 25? cripes! a 45 year old!

she was also married right before that - so maybe, just maybe she was interested in being married

your argument is falling apart all over the place

Jolie in her early twenties married Johnny Lee Miller who is about 40 now (i am too lazy to check). btw, I find him the most desirable of all her husbands.

The first tier woman is not going to fall in love with you.. A, because you are too old, B, because you are divorced and have kids and C, she has so many options, she will fall with someone where she doesn't need to compromise (in respect to his age, kids etc). Sooner or later she will encounter a full package eager to reciprocate her affections and fall for it.

ps i had to look at that shit up

your argument also breaks down because you said that a first tier woman wouldnt date me because she is husband minded.

but then you just said these people you mentioned weren't husband minded but somehow got snatched up and married.

which is it?


and did you see who jolie married at 25? cripes! a 45 year old!

she was also married right before that - so maybe, just maybe she was interested in being married

your argument is falling apart all over the place

I don't even understand why people give a shit about A. Celebrity lives. B. Placing value on human souls. What a fucked up word to use.

who knows but they certainly were open to it as opposed to the career girls around these parts

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:@16:48

spending time with a person isnt a binary decision between getting married and "just someone to sleep with"

there are other options in case you forgot.

ideal for me? a woman 24 years old who is looking for a something semi serious but not yet ready for marriage.

if she were my daughter i'd never advocate she do that, but these are grown ups making their own decisions.

kids don't have be nasty baggage, its funny you put it that way. with shared custody, time over laps can be minimal and geeze, maybe the kids are lovely and she enjoys spending time with them?

serious question for you: what year was it when you got married in your 20's? part of my thesis has an assumption that their is trend in place that is increasing the age gaps which seem acceptable to people currently.

this is for a lot of reasons but the two main ones are the feminization of men and the poor economy which has had a serious negative impact on the ability of young males to evolve into men.

its a push and a pull. guys in their 20's arent nearly as attractive to women in their 20's and men in their late 30's and early 40's are increasingly focused on staying fit, healthy, energetic, etc.

which ones - like "waste your best years in a relationship that is not going anywhere"?

i find it funny that you are basically admitting that women you are looking for are not the type that you would like your daughter to be like. so you understand that those women are not doing well for themselves by being with men like you (and i agree!). and that is, btw, because those women are at best second-tier women.

your reasons for why you will remain attractive to youg women for many years are frankly, delusional. they sound very much like feminist BS about looks not being important, having babies in mid forties etc, etc. at the end of the day, there exists biological reality which, though not identical, is as relevant for men as it is for women. you can stay fit and wear nice suits all you want (just like women in their forites are often fit and beautiful and all that) and yet your mere age is going to severely constrict your options. it looks like you personally have experienced increased desirability in your thirties and are extrapolating that trend (or at least believe the level will be maintained) into your forties and fifties... but it doesn't work that way.

you're making an assumption - that the first tier women are looking for a husband at 25. many many of them aren't and its not because they didn't have a father tell them that should be. its because their sisters and mothers and friends and feminist leaders tell them that 35 is the new 25 and one should get out there and experience the world.

a woman who is 24, two years after college and in position where she may be contemplating graduate school - may very well not be looking for a husband at that point - but could very well be first tier.

just because they aren't husband shopping at 24 doesn't make them second tier by definition.

i'm sure many of the women on here would argue the same thing.

and finally, no i dont think by any stretch of the imagination that at 50 i'll be able to attract the same caliber (ie young and first tier) of woman as i do now. not unless i suddenly got famous (which really is the only thing keeping me from doing so, all the rest is in place). but i'll definitely have a nice selection of 35 year old woman to chose from, and according to this forum - thats just a few years removed from a woman's peak! haha.

i suspect in reality, my peak will be in about 4-5 years. and even then 24 will be too young realistically. 28 not so much.

a woman does not need to husband shop in order to get married. the most desirable women attract most desirable men and, since both sides make very few compromises, they fall in love most easily, leading to marriage. thus, the most desirable women and men are snatched first. it's only when a person needs to make compromises that the calculating mindset ('husband shopping') emerges. look at the women models and hollywood stars - most of them had their (first) marriages in their twenties. check it out and you will be surprised how common it still is.

well i'm impressed at your ability to simultaneously argue with me and insult a large swath of women at the same time! are you a man?

thats right ladies, you heard it here first from a (presumably) fellow female - if you aren't snatched up off your feet and married in your 20's when you weren't even expecting it - you are not prime material! and every day that goes by that this never happens, your value declines even further

It's not that incremental (the value declines every single day) but are you really suggesting that Angelina Jolie, Scarlett Johansson, Megan Fox etc etc were husband shopping in their twenties? Angie of all people?

All I know that at age almost 48, my sex life has never been better, the men in my life are the best quality ever, and I don't give a fuck what some egotistical dOod has to say

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:@16:48

spending time with a person isnt a binary decision between getting married and "just someone to sleep with"

there are other options in case you forgot.

ideal for me? a woman 24 years old who is looking for a something semi serious but not yet ready for marriage.

if she were my daughter i'd never advocate she do that, but these are grown ups making their own decisions.

kids don't have be nasty baggage, its funny you put it that way. with shared custody, time over laps can be minimal and geeze, maybe the kids are lovely and she enjoys spending time with them?

serious question for you: what year was it when you got married in your 20's? part of my thesis has an assumption that their is trend in place that is increasing the age gaps which seem acceptable to people currently.

this is for a lot of reasons but the two main ones are the feminization of men and the poor economy which has had a serious negative impact on the ability of young males to evolve into men.

its a push and a pull. guys in their 20's arent nearly as attractive to women in their 20's and men in their late 30's and early 40's are increasingly focused on staying fit, healthy, energetic, etc.

which ones - like "waste your best years in a relationship that is not going anywhere"?

i find it funny that you are basically admitting that women you are looking for are not the type that you would like your daughter to be like. so you understand that those women are not doing well for themselves by being with men like you (and i agree!). and that is, btw, because those women are at best second-tier women.

your reasons for why you will remain attractive to youg women for many years are frankly, delusional. they sound very much like feminist BS about looks not being important, having babies in mid forties etc, etc. at the end of the day, there exists biological reality which, though not identical, is as relevant for men as it is for women. you can stay fit and wear nice suits all you want (just like women in their forites are often fit and beautiful and all that) and yet your mere age is going to severely constrict your options. it looks like you personally have experienced increased desirability in your thirties and are extrapolating that trend (or at least believe the level will be maintained) into your forties and fifties... but it doesn't work that way.

you're making an assumption - that the first tier women are looking for a husband at 25. many many of them aren't and its not because they didn't have a father tell them that should be. its because their sisters and mothers and friends and feminist leaders tell them that 35 is the new 25 and one should get out there and experience the world.

a woman who is 24, two years after college and in position where she may be contemplating graduate school - may very well not be looking for a husband at that point - but could very well be first tier.

just because they aren't husband shopping at 24 doesn't make them second tier by definition.

i'm sure many of the women on here would argue the same thing.

and finally, no i dont think by any stretch of the imagination that at 50 i'll be able to attract the same caliber (ie young and first tier) of woman as i do now. not unless i suddenly got famous (which really is the only thing keeping me from doing so, all the rest is in place). but i'll definitely have a nice selection of 35 year old woman to chose from, and according to this forum - thats just a few years removed from a woman's peak! haha.

i suspect in reality, my peak will be in about 4-5 years. and even then 24 will be too young realistically. 28 not so much.

a woman does not need to husband shop in order to get married. the most desirable women attract most desirable men and, since both sides make very few compromises, they fall in love most easily, leading to marriage. thus, the most desirable women and men are snatched first. it's only when a person needs to make compromises that the calculating mindset ('husband shopping') emerges. look at the women models and hollywood stars - most of them had their (first) marriages in their twenties. check it out and you will be surprised how common it still is.

well i'm impressed at your ability to simultaneously argue with me and insult a large swath of women at the same time! are you a man?

thats right ladies, you heard it here first from a (presumably) fellow female - if you aren't snatched up off your feet and married in your 20's when you weren't even expecting it - you are not prime material! and every day that goes by that this never happens, your value declines even further