You have gone out of your way to provide a plethora of information of 'what is there to be heard'.

Let's not make this out that it's only black kids who are doing the classroom crimes of passion. Some of these kids have behavioral problems (talking back, disrespectful, fighting) but I can't remember the last time I heard of some black kid gunning down classrooms of students or building bombs for retaliation to classmates (mind you, I'm talking about multiple massacres but no less critical than one or two individuals hurt no matter who does the crime).

Yes, their is inner city violence in schools but I think you do an injustice by implying that all school disciplinary problems are caused by blacks. Most definitely, white kids with disciplinary problems contribute majorly too even in our own backyard (one early poster mentioned several....yes, cheating scandals are disciplinary problems and not a boys will be boys issue).

I would much rather deal with a loud mouth kid than one who walks into a classroom and blows everyone to smithereens.

And for the record, the most documented heinous school crimes have been done by white kids. Just a few examples below without mentioning the most recent.

http://www.splcenter.org/blog/2013/01/07/teen-white-supremacist-arrested-for-planning-bomb-attack-on-alabama-school/

http://news.minnesota.publicradio.org/features/2005/03/21_gundersond_redlakeshooting/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Columbine_High_School_massacre

http://www.childtrendsdatabank.org/?q=node/269 Differences by Race and Hispanic Origins
In 2011, black males were significantly less likely to carry weapons than white males (21 versus 27 percent). There were no other significant differences by race or Hispanic origin. (Figure 2)

In the 1990s, black students were significantly more likely to carry weapons than were white students (33 percent versus 25 percent, in 1991, when the gap was greatest). Although the percentage for Hispanic students was similar to that for white students in 1991, the gap between these groups grew, reaching a peak in 1997. In that year, 23 percent of Hispanic students and 17 percent of white students had carried a weapon in the past 30 days. Since then, however, there have been no significant differences by race/ethnicity in weapon-carrying.

Anonymous wrote:AA children are better behaved than the white children at my DCs school!! Most of the white kids need to get smacked into reality a couple of times.

racist remark : Let's turn it around --White children are better behaved than the white children at my DCs school!! Most of the AA kids need to get smacked into reality a couple of times. Bigoted, much?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On the contrary, I think you might be misguided to think it does not or cannot possibly happen.

A study on immigrant children and their experiences in being bullied in school was an eye opener.

NP. You seem to be misunderstanding or perhaps intentionally mischaracterizing the positions of other PPs. No one here is saying discrimination cannot or does not occur. All people are saying is that not every case where a minority child is criticized can be attributed to prejudice.

bump

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the alliance part. You should individually talk to a staff member about your experience in a cooperative manner. An alliance is not often possible. Say there are 100 kids in the grade, 50 are girls, of the 50 boys 25 are white, of the 25 other you have 5 asian, 5 black, 5 hispanic, 10 "other". Many kids are from other countries or their parents are - everybody has a different background and experience. Each child has a different experience. Most schools so small treat kids as individuals. You can't say for all X kids we need to learn to do Y. It does not work that way.

You need to find a trusted administrator and work through any issue - academic, emotional, spiritual, social, etc.

Do you have any tips on how to find a trusted administrator at one's school? In most predominately white environments racial issues are scoffed at when mentioned or reported.

I would say if there is not an administrator that you have connected with or the student does not have one teacher he/she has connected with - maybe find another family that can help you navigate this new world.

Actually, when I dealt with it, the parent reached out to me (another parent) and I helped identify an administrator that I thought would "get it" and had the ability to manage it.

It was a delicate situation - I was talking about another person's chlid to the admin. They had to check with the family and the child to make sure that was okay.

It was a 2 way street. The administrator is being asked to believe that the child feels out of place whether it is because of race, religion, financial - they want to believe they have created a warm environment. It a hard pill to swallow.

The student/family has to own that maybe they have not been diverse in their own world and their feelings, though real, have to be owned and they have to be willing to be more open to friendships with people they don't feel comfortable being around.

It does not happen by October freshman year. It takes time.

I quickly exited stage left when the student felt empowered to talk for himself which took only about 2 months to build trust.

We entered school on an off year and our school assigned a "host" famiy to us since we missed some nuances that you would learn the first year. I liked the "host" famiy idea. It worked well for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

There is a plethora of information to be found to dispute your BS comment PP. Open your eyes. See what is there to be seen. Hear what is there to be heard.

http://toped.svefoundation.org/2011/10/06/disparate-discipline-in-public-schools/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/06/education/black-students-face-more-harsh-discipline-data-shows.html?_r=0

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

http://www.timesdispatch.com/news/henrico-schools-questioned-about-discipline-race/article_1be879f6-82bd-52aa-b726-0a9660de58ec.html

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

http://www.delawareonline.com/article/20121218/NEWS03/121218013/Investigation-Christina-schools-disciplined-black-students-more-harshly-

Here is another. The information is out there if you take your blinders off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2012-09-26/news/ct-met-unequal-school-discipline-20120926_1_black-students-superintendent-nicholas-wahl-federal-data

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the alliance part. You should individually talk to a staff member about your experience in a cooperative manner. An alliance is not often possible. Say there are 100 kids in the grade, 50 are girls, of the 50 boys 25 are white, of the 25 other you have 5 asian, 5 black, 5 hispanic, 10 "other". Many kids are from other countries or their parents are - everybody has a different background and experience. Each child has a different experience. Most schools so small treat kids as individuals. You can't say for all X kids we need to learn to do Y. It does not work that way.

You need to find a trusted administrator and work through any issue - academic, emotional, spiritual, social, etc.

Do you have any tips on how to find a trusted administrator at one's school? In most predominately white environments racial issues are scoffed at when mentioned or reported.

I disagree with the alliance part. You should individually talk to a staff member about your experience in a cooperative manner. An alliance is not often possible. Say there are 100 kids in the grade, 50 are girls, of the 50 boys 25 are white, of the 25 other you have 5 asian, 5 black, 5 hispanic, 10 "other". Many kids are from other countries or their parents are - everybody has a different background and experience. Each child has a different experience. Most schools so small treat kids as individuals. You can't say for all X kids we need to learn to do Y. It does not work that way.

You need to find a trusted administrator and work through any issue - academic, emotional, spiritual, social, etc.

What if you can't find an alliance??

1:58 I agree 100%. White parents also feel that their child has been unfairly treated at times and feel helpless to change things at ALL schools from time to time. Sometimes there is a problem, and sometimes there is not. It is often hard to know what exactly is going on at school. That is why parents form alliances to check out what really goes on!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue in public and private schools, OP. In public schools, black males have a different suspension rate for the exact same offenses. It's just how the world is. You are at the school, hopefully, because you have identified something your child gets there that he cannot get anywhere else, not because paying tuition entitles you to a life void of racism. We all have to work toward that together.

I can tell you that the same attitudes exist amongst parents in the public/charter school world in DC as well. "How can we get the poor kids out of the school that is in our neighborhood?" "How can we get more white kids to the school?" "Yes, the school has lots of AAs but they are high-SES, so, you know..."

You live with this, you deal with this and you always will. The US has a strong legacy of racism. The best thing you can do for your child is to give him a great education so that he can help to educate the world out of ignorance. He will know what it means to be on the outside (and btw unless he goes to an HBCU, he will experience this at the next level anyway) and hopefully he can turn that into something positive. To be young, gifted and black...a blessing and a curse.

I call bs on the bolded comment above, cite the source, and post a link to the peer reviewed jouranl article and let';s see the sample size, longitudinal range of teh study, etc..

Not the PP, but here's a few articles:

http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02732170701796429
http://edr.sagepub.com/content/39/1/59.short
Skiba, Russell J., et al. "Parsing Disciplinary Disproportionality: Contributions of Behavior, Student, and School Characteristics to Suspension and Expulsion." (2012), p.6
http://uex.sagepub.com/content/early/2012/07/30/0042085912450575.abstract

Also to the poster who called BS. Please check out the "BS" sources such as the Washington Post article and studies done by the Department of Justice.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/in-washington-area-african-american-students-suspended-and-expelled-two-to-five-times-as-often-as-whites/2011/12/23/gIQA8WNQNP_story.html?wpisrc=al_national

Again, not to imply DC independents have the exact same issues, but you cannot deny there is a disparity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are clearly a lot of people with perceptions that their children face racial bias and, at a minimum, stereotyping. Again, it's hard to feel even-handed and cool-headed if your child is in trouble, but I have seen numerous parents of all races blame the school or say their child is being picked on. The white parents who do this tend to say there is a personality conflict with a teacher or coach who does not like/picks on their child; they also will say (unless they are wealthy) that class determines the treatment of their child. Some of the AA parents use the same arguments, some raise issues of racial bias.

In all the cases I can think of, the amazing thing is that the punishment/treatment really was the same across the board as in the past. But people get selective memories and/or (perhaps even more frequently) just aren't in a position to know what has happened in the past unless they've had multiple kids stretching over many years, for example, or have a friend/spouse working at the school. It is understandable -- the instinct to defend one's young is powerful -- but at least at the school I am thinking of the suspicions of unfair disciplinary treatment, by parents of ALL races, seem misplaced. And I do think that a lot of time it distracts attention away from the real issue: the child, and how the issue arose in the first place. Maybe the school is not a good academic fit. Maybe there are learning issues. Maybe there is a substance issue that could be nipped in the bud if dealt with early. Maybe there is a situation with online addiction (the articles on screen time for teens and college students will turn your hair).

I have 6 years in the private school environment as a parent and as an employee and your post is dead on and very well balanced. Insecure parent, read above.

"I guess I would advise AA parents or other parents of under--represented minorities to balance vigilance (because prejudice still exists) with trust in approaching the school, and try to really get to know some of your childrens' teachers so if you are getting a bad feeling about something you might have a good internal sounding board to raise your concerns."

How exactly does a parent really get to know their children's teachers, at a cocktail party? During a conference? I'm responding as if the child is in middle school or higher. At DS's school, teachers follow what appears to be a school-guided protocol in communicating with parents. Perhaps parents that teachers find easier to relate to have a different experience.

Clearly OP was having a bad internal feeling that prompted her to put this post up.