Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

Oh, no, I would hate this. Let people plan their finances.
Imagine forgoing private school or that neighborhood you would have preferred or an expensive sport or instrument for your kid, because you needed to be financially responsible, and then finding out there was money for it all along but your deceased relative thought it would be fun to keep it a secret.

Well, it is the relatives money until it is not. There are no guarantees ever. They can do with it anything they want including keeping it a secret.
Plus, should we not all be "financially responsible" regardless of what may or may not be ahead?

PP was saying "wouldn't it be fun if you structured your estate to provide a surprise bonus 10 years after you died" and I am saying "no, that's a dick move and it would be kinder to just give people the money you want to give them."
You coming in with "but they're allowed to do what they want with their money" doesn't keep it from being a dick move.

I sure wouldn't leave a nice surprise like that to you ten years later, I guess you'd think I was a real dick. I'll save it for someone who would appreciate the windfall.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandfather left his house, next door to us, to me to pay for my college. I was a minor so my mother had power of attorney or somethig. He died when I was 12. We rented it to Stetson Law students for a few years, after I cleaned and painted it all myself. When I was 17 she sold it. She never used any of the money for my college expenses. What she did only really became clear to me later.

Which was what?

She took the house and the sale money, which my grandfather had intended to be used for college. She used it for herself. Probably legal since I was a minor, dunno. But seems wrong to me. She contributed nothing of the money toward college. Actually, she contributed nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My childless, never married uncle left over $1 million to each of the three women who cared for him in his final years.
My two sisters and I each received $10k.

We all had mixed feelings about this but in the end there was nothing to do and we were happy that these ladies had a windfall.
He was estranged from my mother in the last years of his life and rebuffed my sisters' and mine' outreach.

Just curious - did they all live under the same roof in a polyamorous family ?

Um, I don’t think so…he was in a nursing home and they were part of his 24 hour care. They sent us each a photo album of their time with him and some written reflections. It was quite sweet.

My dad now has round the clock care and those people are true heroes.

Wow. I'm AMAZED that the facility allowed them to accept that

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandfather left his house, next door to us, to me to pay for my college. I was a minor so my mother had power of attorney or somethig. He died when I was 12. We rented it to Stetson Law students for a few years, after I cleaned and painted it all myself. When I was 17 she sold it. She never used any of the money for my college expenses. What she did only really became clear to me later.

It depends on how a trust or will is worded. It’s a little late but always get your own lawyer to explain all the documents.
Which was what?

She took the house and the sale money, which my grandfather had intended to be used for college. She used it for herself. Probably legal since I was a minor, dunno. But seems wrong to me. She contributed nothing of the money toward college. Actually, she contributed nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandfather left his house, next door to us, to me to pay for my college. I was a minor so my mother had power of attorney or somethig. He died when I was 12. We rented it to Stetson Law students for a few years, after I cleaned and painted it all myself. When I was 17 she sold it. She never used any of the money for my college expenses. What she did only really became clear to me later.

Which was what?

She took the house and the sale money, which my grandfather had intended to be used for college. She used it for herself. Probably legal since I was a minor, dunno. But seems wrong to me. She contributed nothing of the money toward college. Actually, she contributed nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My grandfather left his house, next door to us, to me to pay for my college. I was a minor so my mother had power of attorney or somethig. He died when I was 12. We rented it to Stetson Law students for a few years, after I cleaned and painted it all myself. When I was 17 she sold it. She never used any of the money for my college expenses. What she did only really became clear to me later.

Which was what?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My childless, never married uncle left over $1 million to each of the three women who cared for him in his final years.
My two sisters and I each received $10k.

We all had mixed feelings about this but in the end there was nothing to do and we were happy that these ladies had a windfall.
He was estranged from my mother in the last years of his life and rebuffed my sisters' and mine' outreach.

Just curious - did they all live under the same roof in a polyamorous family ?

Um, I don’t think so…he was in a nursing home and they were part of his 24 hour care. They sent us each a photo album of their time with him and some written reflections. It was quite sweet.

My dad now has round the clock care and those people are true heroes.

Anonymous wrote:My grandfather left his house, next door to us, to me to pay for my college. I was a minor so my mother had power of attorney or somethig. He died when I was 12. We rented it to Stetson Law students for a few years, after I cleaned and painted it all myself. When I was 17 she sold it. She never used any of the money for my college expenses. What she did only really became clear to me later.

Anonymous wrote:I received a letter from the IRS saying that I owed them an enormous amount in taxes. I was hysterical. I called up my father to help me figure out what to do. It turns out that the money was from my deceased brother’s estate and my father never had told me about it because I was in the process of divorcing my first husband and my dad didn’t want my ex to get any of that money. My dad also told me that I didn’t owe the IRS anything because it had all been handled by the estate taxes.
So I called the company that had the assets to find out about them. First the agent who answered my phone call needed to verify who I was. Then they asked me if I was sitting down. Then they told me it was over $200k. This was 40 years ago so it was a great deal of money to me. I’m sure that agent was equally shocked by that phone exchange. I would have rather my brother hadn’t died, but it was a very unexpected inheritance.

Anonymous wrote:Promised from parents to both kids. They left the whole thing to the Humane Society...a total shock! i mean there choice, but a real surprise. Was NEVER discussed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

Oh, no, I would hate this. Let people plan their finances.
Imagine forgoing private school or that neighborhood you would have preferred or an expensive sport or instrument for your kid, because you needed to be financially responsible, and then finding out there was money for it all along but your deceased relative thought it would be fun to keep it a secret.

Well, it is the relatives money until it is not. There are no guarantees ever. They can do with it anything they want including keeping it a secret.
Plus, should we not all be "financially responsible" regardless of what may or may not be ahead?

PP was saying "wouldn't it be fun if you structured your estate to provide a surprise bonus 10 years after you died" and I am saying "no, that's a dick move and it would be kinder to just give people the money you want to give them."
You coming in with "but they're allowed to do what they want with their money" doesn't keep it from being a dick move.