eastcoastmom
Post 02/19/2026 17:58     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
I think it really depends on where he wants to end up geographically and whether he will go onto graduate school. We live in NY now and there are plenty of NYC private school kids who are very enthusiastic about UVA but would not go to JMU. UVA absolutely has national name recognition. I think if you are paying in state tuition for UVA then I would stretch and make it work.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:56     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, what would be the total cost of attendance at each school? (The PPs fixating on the "value" of the JMU scholarship are being distracted by a largely irrelevant number.)


OP here: Roughly $40k/yr at UVA and $20k/yr at JMU. Not night and day, but enough of a difference to pay for a masters.


If that's the difference then UVA is a no-brainer. It's twice as good as JMU anyway.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:54     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
I’m late to the game and didn’t read the replies but I would say don’t take JMU if your child is a strong student. They won’t have the same academic experience. My kid had free tuition to VCU and turned it down.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:52     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you keep a quiet, rough, running tally. No matter what your eldest decides. You do not know yet what student #2 will cost you. What if #2 isn't as good a student but you still want to make sure they attend somewhere best for them? That could cost more. More than UVA or JMU, currently. It will feel very odd/likely unfair to the eldest, if they are actually the better student, if the basis of their decision needs to be to save you money.


OP here: I agree. We will definitely keep it fair between the kids in terms of the amount of family financial support offered. I don't want them to resent their decisions or each other!


I think this is wise, OP. My husband's sister resented him for life because his parents spent more money on his tuition than her tuition. I don't think she ever forgot this fact or ever let him forget it. She acted like he was the one who owed her.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:28     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Honestly, JMU is a great place for undergraduate teaching.

But UVA has the pedigree and will probably help them more in terms of getting that first job out of college.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:28     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
I don't think each kid is entitled to the same financial contribution


The plan better be that it's fair.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:21     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
I'm a pp. No, you don't need to hand them a check! Or course not. But maybe there's grad school and you help one a more than another to balance it out. Maybe there's help with a car. Maybe the student who spent more of your money on UG gets Grandma's used car, and with the other you help with a parent loan.

Lots of unique ways. Point is, you don't know yet.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:20     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you keep a quiet, rough, running tally. No matter what your eldest decides. You do not know yet what student #2 will cost you. What if #2 isn't as good a student but you still want to make sure they attend somewhere best for them? That could cost more. More than UVA or JMU, currently. It will feel very odd/likely unfair to the eldest, if they are actually the better student, if the basis of their decision needs to be to save you money.


OP here: I agree. We will definitely keep it fair between the kids in terms of the amount of family financial support offered. I don't want them to resent their decisions or each other!


I come at this a different way. I don;t think each kid is entitled to the same financial contribution - I think each kid is entitled to the most support you can give them, given all the relevant factors. If the oldest goes for a full ride at JMU, are you suggesting that he or she is entitled to a check in the amount of tuition paid at #2's school?

dp. My one kid is going to an in state with merit. My other kid is going oos but using some of their own money to pay for it.

My in state kid is getting extra cash when they graduate. The oos kid is getting nothing.

The kicker is, my in state kid will probably make a ton of money given their trajectory and major. The other kid will need a graduate degree to even get close to making $100K.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:18     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, what would be the total cost of attendance at each school? (The PPs fixating on the "value" of the JMU scholarship are being distracted by a largely irrelevant number.)


OP here: Roughly $40k/yr at UVA and $20k/yr at JMU. Not night and day, but enough of a difference to pay for a masters.


JMU is the logical choice.

No state flagship is worth an extra $80,000.


Not so. A UVA grad may well earn much more than the JMU grad, thanks to different opportunities, making the high tuition a sensible return on investment.


This is entirely speculative. Take that 80K and stick it in an index fund and let’s see how that looks when the kid retires.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:16     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you keep a quiet, rough, running tally. No matter what your eldest decides. You do not know yet what student #2 will cost you. What if #2 isn't as good a student but you still want to make sure they attend somewhere best for them? That could cost more. More than UVA or JMU, currently. It will feel very odd/likely unfair to the eldest, if they are actually the better student, if the basis of their decision needs to be to save you money.


OP here: I agree. We will definitely keep it fair between the kids in terms of the amount of family financial support offered. I don't want them to resent their decisions or each other!


I come at this a different way. I don;t think each kid is entitled to the same financial contribution - I think each kid is entitled to the most support you can give them, given all the relevant factors. If the oldest goes for a full ride at JMU, are you suggesting that he or she is entitled to a check in the amount of tuition paid at #2's school?
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 17:12     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, what would be the total cost of attendance at each school? (The PPs fixating on the "value" of the JMU scholarship are being distracted by a largely irrelevant number.)


OP here: Roughly $40k/yr at UVA and $20k/yr at JMU. Not night and day, but enough of a difference to pay for a masters.


JMU is the logical choice.

No state flagship is worth an extra $80,000.


Not so. A UVA grad may well earn much more than the JMU grad, thanks to different opportunities, making the high tuition a sensible return on investment.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 15:44     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Since JMU isn't technically a FREE full ride since it doesn't include housing and dining, I'd go UVA.


Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 15:27     Subject: Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:OP here: Being overly sensitive not to dox them, it's the type of major that literally everyone in the field has told us "it doesn't matter at all where you went to school." It also requires a masters and doesn't pay a whole ton (tops out around $80-100k maybe).


If it’s for teaching or something similar, JMU is a great choice.
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 15:27     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you keep a quiet, rough, running tally. No matter what your eldest decides. You do not know yet what student #2 will cost you. What if #2 isn't as good a student but you still want to make sure they attend somewhere best for them? That could cost more. More than UVA or JMU, currently. It will feel very odd/likely unfair to the eldest, if they are actually the better student, if the basis of their decision needs to be to save you money.


OP here: I agree. We will definitely keep it fair between the kids in terms of the amount of family financial support offered. I don't want them to resent their decisions or each other!
Anonymous
Post 02/19/2026 15:16     Subject: Re:Crazy to take big merit money at JMU over UVA full price?
OP, I think you keep a quiet, rough, running tally. No matter what your eldest decides. You do not know yet what student #2 will cost you. What if #2 isn't as good a student but you still want to make sure they attend somewhere best for them? That could cost more. More than UVA or JMU, currently. It will feel very odd/likely unfair to the eldest, if they are actually the better student, if the basis of their decision needs to be to save you money.