Anonymous wrote:I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

Why would they want to meet the gold digger who will has new kids to replace them and steal their inheritance?

You are a very sucky dad who only cares about getting your D wet. Thats what your daughter thinks. She knows that you will remarry, and you’ve wasted no time jumping into a toxic relationship ship. She is more mature than you are.

So gross. I’m 48f. I have girlfriends who are into their mid 50s. They are “just like me” in the sense that they look good, dress well, have jobs, young adult kids in college, like to exercise, stay fit, go out for dinner, hang out and have fun.

Meanwhile my mom is 75. She is “old”. And she’s “young old” like still looks good, dresses well, exercises. But there’s no getting around the fact that she’s an old lady, while my 50 something friends are not. It would be so gross if my friends were dating people my parents age.

She is 56, you are 72, she wants something from you and it’s not love and companionship.
We can’t stop you from being a fool but at least don’t drag your kids into this insanity.

Sir, there is only one reason a 56 year old woman dates a 72 year old man.

You kids know it. Your girlfriend knows it.

Don’t act surprised your kids are unhappy.

Clearly you've learned NOTHING from your 7 decades of life on earth.

What a waste of time and space you've been, OP. You don't have much time left. It would be nice if you could spend that time overhauling your understanding of human nature, specifically, that of your kids', but I don't think you have it in you, buddy. After 70 years, I think we have proof that you can't make the socio-emotional connections.

So do whatever you want, because you've already lost. Your kids have written you off at this point.

Yeah, honestly I feel like the age difference between you and girlfriend + the arguing is a no go.

1. Apologize to your DD for saying your girlfriend can help your DD with missing her mom more during pregnancy. HIGHLY INAPPROPRIATE.

2. Contact an estate attorney. Honor your late wife by making sure HER half of your combined assets will go to your kids. You can do with your half whatever you want.

3. There’s a grandchild coming. Do you want to be involved and see him or her? If so, stop pushing and follow your DD’s lead.

4 Seriously consider if arguing is how you want to spend your time.

Good luck to you

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

Not always true.

I've known MANY people who waited years before dating after divorce or death of spouse and those people (kind and loving ... and patient) were never accepted nor welcomed by kids, including those who were already adults.

The cold hard fact is that if you have kids and ever want to date again there is a high likelihood your children will not be supportive.

Hard disagree. The PP above this one is correct. If a widow takes the time to grieve and heal and not jump right into a new relationship the adult children will be more welcoming. Ask me how I know. It is all these older men who can not manage a moment by themselves and who are within months of losing a beloved wife and mother proclaim that they are in love again (massive eye roll here) that the adult children are reacting too.

This. There's nothing wrong with wanting your parent to learn to cope with grief in a healthy manner and maybe develop some practical skills rather than latching on to the next warm body regardless of what problems that person may bring. And the more times the adult children have to meet a new person, the more tired of it they will get. Like it or not, grieving widowers are vulnerable to exploitation and the adult children are right to be cautious.

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to meet her either and I say this as a 57 year old woman.

Ha! So true! The GF sounds like a selfish mess and the OP sounds insufferable. They are the type of people I can't be bothered with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

Not always true.

I've known MANY people who waited years before dating after divorce or death of spouse and those people (kind and loving ... and patient) were never accepted nor welcomed by kids, including those who were already adults.

The cold hard fact is that if you have kids and ever want to date again there is a high likelihood your children will not be supportive.

Hard disagree. The PP above this one is correct. If a widow takes the time to grieve and heal and not jump right into a new relationship the adult children will be more welcoming. Ask me how I know. It is all these older men who can not manage a moment by themselves and who are within months of losing a beloved wife and mother proclaim that they are in love again (massive eye roll here) that the adult children are reacting too.

why are you bothering to date someone in a completely different generation, with whom you fight all the time? you sound needy and pathetic.

You are 72! What makes you so sure you will have a new wife in the future?

Do you not have any friends? Can you not enjoy life with your own company?

Its really gross and disrespectful that you started dating only three months after your wife died.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

Not always true.

I've known MANY people who waited years before dating after divorce or death of spouse and those people (kind and loving ... and patient) were never accepted nor welcomed by kids, including those who were already adults.

The cold hard fact is that if you have kids and ever want to date again there is a high likelihood your children will not be supportive.

ACOD don't want more complexity. They don't want to welcome anyone or play happy family. They just want to avoid the whole thing.