Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:For me (hetero female), it’s mental. I need to feel super desirable to enjoy sex. There are three parts to this for me: first one is me feeling fit and groomed and attractive; second is my partner letting me know he finds me sexy and he wants me; third is him being attractive. I see how arousing it is when two attractive people make love. The visual of me when I’m with an overweight, out of shape, non groomed man is a huge turnoff. Maybe this is a performative issue I have from being raised in the 90s, but I just cannot let loose and enjoy myself without those three components.

lol that might work in your 20’s but not after 40. OP is in her 50’s. There in no sex happening.

You think people stop having sex in their 50s?
Dh and I are mid 60s and are still having great sex.

With each other?

Yes. We've been having sex with each other for over 40 years.
So we have gotten pretty good at it. Lol.

Nice!! Better than many in their 30s I bet.
Many men in this age group have a lot of problems in the bedroom due to spending so much time with "ladies" online. Its ridiculous.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me (hetero female), it’s mental. I need to feel super desirable to enjoy sex. There are three parts to this for me: first one is me feeling fit and groomed and attractive; second is my partner letting me know he finds me sexy and he wants me; third is him being attractive. I see how arousing it is when two attractive people make love. The visual of me when I’m with an overweight, out of shape, non groomed man is a huge turnoff. Maybe this is a performative issue I have from being raised in the 90s, but I just cannot let loose and enjoy myself without those three components.

lol that might work in your 20’s but not after 40. OP is in her 50’s. There in no sex happening.

You think people stop having sex in their 50s?
Dh and I are mid 60s and are still having great sex.

With each other?

Yes. We've been having sex with each other for over 40 years.
So we have gotten pretty good at it. Lol.

Anonymous wrote:My Dad, a widower, is 74 and he is very fit as he still competes in half iron man type events. He complains that most women age appropriate for him are out of shape with many having "given up". We've discussed him dating younger and since we have a 30 year age gap we jokingly agree that half that gap or 15 years (age 57+) would keep me from rolling my eyes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me (hetero female), it’s mental. I need to feel super desirable to enjoy sex. There are three parts to this for me: first one is me feeling fit and groomed and attractive; second is my partner letting me know he finds me sexy and he wants me; third is him being attractive. I see how arousing it is when two attractive people make love. The visual of me when I’m with an overweight, out of shape, non groomed man is a huge turnoff. Maybe this is a performative issue I have from being raised in the 90s, but I just cannot let loose and enjoy myself without those three components.

lol that might work in your 20’s but not after 40. OP is in her 50’s. There in no sex happening.

You think people stop having sex in their 50s?
Dh and I are mid 60s and are still having great sex.

With each other?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me (hetero female), it’s mental. I need to feel super desirable to enjoy sex. There are three parts to this for me: first one is me feeling fit and groomed and attractive; second is my partner letting me know he finds me sexy and he wants me; third is him being attractive. I see how arousing it is when two attractive people make love. The visual of me when I’m with an overweight, out of shape, non groomed man is a huge turnoff. Maybe this is a performative issue I have from being raised in the 90s, but I just cannot let loose and enjoy myself without those three components.

lol that might work in your 20’s but not after 40. OP is in her 50’s. There in no sex happening.

You think people stop having sex in their 50s?
Dh and I are mid 60s and are still having great sex.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me (hetero female), it’s mental. I need to feel super desirable to enjoy sex. There are three parts to this for me: first one is me feeling fit and groomed and attractive; second is my partner letting me know he finds me sexy and he wants me; third is him being attractive. I see how arousing it is when two attractive people make love. The visual of me when I’m with an overweight, out of shape, non groomed man is a huge turnoff. Maybe this is a performative issue I have from being raised in the 90s, but I just cannot let loose and enjoy myself without those three components.

lol that might work in your 20’s but not after 40. OP is in her 50’s. There in no sex happening.

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% irrelevant after 60. Be greatful you have a good man. You are not 16

My mom had last BF at 65. He was fit and only 2 years older

They were both irrelevant?

Anonymous wrote:We are both late 50’s and recently divorced. I am fit and told I look younger. He looks his age with a dad bod. He’s funny and kind. Seems like a genuine good person. I wish he was in better shape but I’m otherwise very attracted to his eyes and smile and personality. I need some encouragement not to get hung up on this potbelly. I know I’m not perfect either. My cellulite and aging skin is not gonna get any better.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% irrelevant after 60. Be greatful you have a good man. You are not 16

My mom had last BF at 65. He was fit and only 2 years older

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% irrelevant after 60. Be greatful you have a good man. You are not 16

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Anonymous wrote:You have a guy on the hook, reel him in. The sea is pretty empty the older you get.

Why? For what?

Because the pool shrinks the older women get. There are fewer men around and those who can engage a younger woman do so. The 60yo rich adonis is dating 45 and below. The nice, decent guys who want to date a woman of his age has many many women to pick from.

You forget something important. There is also a 3rd choice that women have: just stay single and enjoy toys instead of feeling disgusted by sex with a partner she doesn’t desire. Particular women with money…

The shrinking dating pool won’t increase chances for the men who don’t watch their weight and grow belly.

You wouldn't bring your masterdation devices to a movie, botanic garden, museum or restaurant, though. People are social animals. Some of us women want men to love and spend time with. Op seems to be put off by his belly? so she shouldn't waste either of their time. Another woman will surely love this guy as he is.

I attend all these events and venues with family and friends. Men’s ability for companionship is way overvalued.

lmao if it wasn't for sex, men literally wouldn't talk to women at all, let alone put up with their sh*t

Yes, we realize this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have a guy on the hook, reel him in. The sea is pretty empty the older you get.

Why? For what?

Because the pool shrinks the older women get. There are fewer men around and those who can engage a younger woman do so. The 60yo rich adonis is dating 45 and below. The nice, decent guys who want to date a woman of his age has many many women to pick from.

You forget something important. There is also a 3rd choice that women have: just stay single and enjoy toys instead of feeling disgusted by sex with a partner she doesn’t desire. Particular women with money…

The shrinking dating pool won’t increase chances for the men who don’t watch their weight and grow belly.

You wouldn't bring your masterdation devices to a movie, botanic garden, museum or restaurant, though. People are social animals. Some of us women want men to love and spend time with. Op seems to be put off by his belly? so she shouldn't waste either of their time. Another woman will surely love this guy as he is.

I attend all these events and venues with family and friends. Men’s ability for companionship is way overvalued.

lmao if it wasn't for sex, men literally wouldn't talk to women at all, let alone put up with their sh*t