Anonymous wrote:Guy here - lingerie, makeup and heels do absolutely nothing for me!

I just want a natural beauty (which I've got!).

How do you feel about shaved legs and long hair? Would you be fine if your wife got a pixie cut?

Anonymous wrote:Why women have to do all this but not men? Should society recognize it as something making women second degree citizens?

You’re right. Women should dress like Fidel Castro. Cigar optional.

I always wear makeup. No nail polish. No salons. Don't dye my hair. Wear sensible shoes. My friends' specific choices are different, all different from each other, though we generally expend roughly the same amount of effort.

As a teen I used to run for the school bus in high heels (Candies). We all evolve with age and judge for ourselves what's important.

I only like those things on MY terms.

Meaning, clothes need to be comfortable (not polyester, thank you very much), flattering to my figure and exactly the style I want. I hate high heels and think stilettos are for stabbing, so for me, shoes will always be round-toed and flat, or at most, 2 inch heels.

Make up is fun once in a while. Not every day.

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Anonymous wrote:Depends on the reasons behind them I guess. If you are forced to use them? That's obviously not ok.

If society is seeing it as something valuable then you are practically forced. If you don't compete, you're at disadvantage.

This is not true of the example you used though. There are just as many people in society who do not value those things and in fact look down on those same elements as trashy.

OP, you make it sound like all or nothing. Never the case.

They are gender performance. Whether healthy or subjugation—only the wearer can know.

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Anonymous wrote:Look at Pamela Anderson. She knows about makeup, high heels, the male gaze, and being judged better than anyone…and yet today she walks red carpets without any makeup on. You do you, OP. No one is going to stop you.

She was already very successful in her career. She doesn’t have anything to prove now. She wouldn’t have gotten where she is without the makeup, heels, and breast implants in her youth. Maybe things have changed but I still see most Hollywood stars wearing makeup and heels.

I’m not impressed that Pam Andersen looks normal now. It would have been something if she took a stand in her heyday. Has she ever talked about her terrible the images she put out were for the self esteem for young women? Or did she just cash out and move along?

Agree! It’s like she had to try to find something to become relevant again so the provocative thing to do was a complete 180. Both looks are extremes

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Anonymous wrote:I just see them as things some other women like but I don’t.

Same.

Lingerie is never as comfortable as I’d like. Before I had cancer, I was 36DD. Nothing in my budget was both cute and functional.

My skin is too sensitive for makeup.

I do sometimes like wearing heels.

Try being a 32H. It’s awful. But I don’t want to get a reduction because it isn’t my body’s fault that cute lingerie isn’t made for this size.

I am a 32H and have hundreds of pieces of lingerie. That are very comfortable, cute/sexy, functional. People that say they can't find in are not looking.

+1 I'm the same size. There's a lot of cute and comfortable stuff out there.

Post some links ladies

Not in front of computer to send links, but here are my main go to brands -

Harlow & Fox
Empriente
Honey Birdette, Scantilly, Maison Close for date night
Lisa Charmell for casual summer/resort clothes
Natori, Chantell, Primadonna & Panache for daily drivers
Walcoal for wireless
Bordelle when I just want to feel sexy
Monday and Vix for bathing suits

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Anonymous wrote:I just see them as things some other women like but I don’t.

Same.

Lingerie is never as comfortable as I’d like. Before I had cancer, I was 36DD. Nothing in my budget was both cute and functional.

My skin is too sensitive for makeup.

I do sometimes like wearing heels.

Try being a 32H. It’s awful. But I don’t want to get a reduction because it isn’t my body’s fault that cute lingerie isn’t made for this size.

I am a 32H and have hundreds of pieces of lingerie. That are very comfortable, cute/sexy, functional. People that say they can't find in are not looking.

+1 I'm the same size. There's a lot of cute and comfortable stuff out there.

Post some links ladies

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Anonymous wrote:Hmm so I’m in my mid-30s and noticing, socially and professionally, more and more women are not wearing heels or more noticeable makeup (except for weddings and “nice” events). Or increasing women choosing not to color their hair.

It’s a real change even to about ten years ago. I don’t know if the pandemic sped it up or what but it’s interesting.

I haven’t seen a woman wearing makeup at work in years. When I run into a person with a full face of makeup, she sticks out in a bad way. Like she’s insecure and probably fake.

Are you male?

Dp. obviously!!