Anonymous wrote:Was on a 3-hour flight. Packed books, toys, cards and travel games to engage our preschooler and elementary schooler. Spent the rest of the time talking, reading quietly together, closing our eyes. Walked down the aisle a few times for bathroom trips, and each time, every single other family - kid on iPad, parent scrolling X or Instagram on their phone.

What gives?

(Ready for flames for being holier-than-thou, but seriously, what gives? Travel time is great for talking and engaging)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is being smug and maybe trolling, but it's also secretly judge the parents who rely 100% on iPads for travel. I have also noticed the families where each person has their device and they all just stare at their personal screen for the duration of the trip. I think it's lazy parenting and wonder if that's what their families are like at home too. I am glad my kid can get through a flight, even an international one, without an ipad. I guess I'm smug too.

Do you also judge adults flying alone who are using devices? Should everyone have a hardcover novel or a writing pad to keep them entertained? My family interacts plenty at home, we don't need to interact during a long flight where it's loud and uncomfortable.

PP here and yes -- it's actually the parents being buried in their iphone or tablet for the duration of the flight and not interacting with their kids at all that I think is bad because it sets a poor example and I do assume they are like that all the time. And it's not that I think devices are always bad -- I don't care if people use devices on planes or elsewhere. I'm talking about the families where everyone has a personal device and just interacts with that and not at all with each other. I think it's weird especially with very young kids. But even with tweens and teens I think it's healthier and more normal to have a mix and to (1) actually talk to your kids some and (2) encourage them to do more than just play games or watch content.

I know I'm being judgmental. It's not like I'm going to do anything about it. I just generally think we are pretty screen addicted as a society and that's not great and I do notice when a family is completely focused on separate screens and not interacting and yes I judge. Sue me.

Go ahead and judge, but you’re wrong to make such a huge conclusive jump from watching people in one context for a few short hours.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is being smug and maybe trolling, but it's also secretly judge the parents who rely 100% on iPads for travel. I have also noticed the families where each person has their device and they all just stare at their personal screen for the duration of the trip. I think it's lazy parenting and wonder if that's what their families are like at home too. I am glad my kid can get through a flight, even an international one, without an ipad. I guess I'm smug too.

Do you also judge adults flying alone who are using devices? Should everyone have a hardcover novel or a writing pad to keep them entertained? My family interacts plenty at home, we don't need to interact during a long flight where it's loud and uncomfortable.

PP here and yes -- it's actually the parents being buried in their iphone or tablet for the duration of the flight and not interacting with their kids at all that I think is bad because it sets a poor example and I do assume they are like that all the time. And it's not that I think devices are always bad -- I don't care if people use devices on planes or elsewhere. I'm talking about the families where everyone has a personal device and just interacts with that and not at all with each other. I think it's weird especially with very young kids. But even with tweens and teens I think it's healthier and more normal to have a mix and to (1) actually talk to your kids some and (2) encourage them to do more than just play games or watch content.

I know I'm being judgmental. It's not like I'm going to do anything about it. I just generally think we are pretty screen addicted as a society and that's not great and I do notice when a family is completely focused on separate screens and not interacting and yes I judge. Sue me.

Go ahead and judge, but you’re wrong to make such a huge conclusive jump from watching people in one context for a few short hours.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

NP-So I’m super judgy about the use of devices for kids in restaurants, and grocery stores (of all the places to need to distract your kids??), but I make a huge exception for travel. That’s A-OK in my book.

I also am judgy about screens at restaurants or at home. I’m amazed at the number of people who need to put a screen in front of a kid to have them sit at the table.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is being smug and maybe trolling, but it's also secretly judge the parents who rely 100% on iPads for travel. I have also noticed the families where each person has their device and they all just stare at their personal screen for the duration of the trip. I think it's lazy parenting and wonder if that's what their families are like at home too. I am glad my kid can get through a flight, even an international one, without an ipad. I guess I'm smug too.

Do you also judge adults flying alone who are using devices? Should everyone have a hardcover novel or a writing pad to keep them entertained? My family interacts plenty at home, we don't need to interact during a long flight where it's loud and uncomfortable.

PP here and yes -- it's actually the parents being buried in their iphone or tablet for the duration of the flight and not interacting with their kids at all that I think is bad because it sets a poor example and I do assume they are like that all the time. And it's not that I think devices are always bad -- I don't care if people use devices on planes or elsewhere. I'm talking about the families where everyone has a personal device and just interacts with that and not at all with each other. I think it's weird especially with very young kids. But even with tweens and teens I think it's healthier and more normal to have a mix and to (1) actually talk to your kids some and (2) encourage them to do more than just play games or watch content.

I know I'm being judgmental. It's not like I'm going to do anything about it. I just generally think we are pretty screen addicted as a society and that's not great and I do notice when a family is completely focused on separate screens and not interacting and yes I judge. Sue me.

Anonymous wrote:

NP-So I’m super judgy about the use of devices for kids in restaurants, and grocery stores (of all the places to need to distract your kids??), but I make a huge exception for travel. That’s A-OK in my book.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And I don’t know what time of time she spends with her kids but anyone who spends a lot of time with one another doesn’t need to talk on the plane. It is more people who don’t see one another much would be the ones who want to spend all this quality time together on the plane.

My neighbor is a SAhM to 4 kids. She spends all day everyday with the kids. She is just trying to survive the flight.

I talk to my spouse and kids at home but uh we also talk on planes. Not like nonstop or anything but we'll have a conversation.

I don't get the whole "I'm just trying to survive the flight" thing either. Flying is not that difficult. Sure there are times when it's a huge hassle -- if you are on a flight that got delayed or you wind up with some huge annoyance like getting stuck on the tarmac for an hour before take off or horrible turbulence. But most flights are just... fine. I'm not in crisis and reaching for iPads to shut up kids because otherwise I just won't make it. And that includes on international flights. Kids will watch devices some (on an international flight usually at least one movie and if a very long flight of 10+ at least two). But also we will talk and play games and read.

Travel is not some horrible hardship. And if traveling with kids is so difficult that you simply must placate them with devices the whole time then maybe don't travel so much. It's optional.

Oh, I'll let my friend who just flew her kids down to FL because her mother died unexpectedly that that trip was optional.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was on a 3-hour flight. Packed books, toys, cards and travel games to engage our preschooler and elementary schooler. Spent the rest of the time talking, reading quietly together, closing our eyes. Walked down the aisle a few times for bathroom trips, and each time, every single other family - kid on iPad, parent scrolling X or Instagram on their phone.

What gives?

(Ready for flames for being holier-than-thou, but seriously, what gives? Travel time is great for talking and engaging)

Shrug. I do the same for my 2 year old. Every time we’ve flown I’ve gotten comments from my neighbors how surprised they are I can keep DS quiet and engaged without screens. He’s definitely sitting still - he climbs all over his seat and me but he stays quiet and does not disturb other passengers. But I also don’t judge the other parents for using screens.

Um...no

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And I don’t know what time of time she spends with her kids but anyone who spends a lot of time with one another doesn’t need to talk on the plane. It is more people who don’t see one another much would be the ones who want to spend all this quality time together on the plane.

My neighbor is a SAhM to 4 kids. She spends all day everyday with the kids. She is just trying to survive the flight.

I talk to my spouse and kids at home but uh we also talk on planes. Not like nonstop or anything but we'll have a conversation.

I don't get the whole "I'm just trying to survive the flight" thing either. Flying is not that difficult. Sure there are times when it's a huge hassle -- if you are on a flight that got delayed or you wind up with some huge annoyance like getting stuck on the tarmac for an hour before take off or horrible turbulence. But most flights are just... fine. I'm not in crisis and reaching for iPads to shut up kids because otherwise I just won't make it. And that includes on international flights. Kids will watch devices some (on an international flight usually at least one movie and if a very long flight of 10+ at least two). But also we will talk and play games and read.

Travel is not some horrible hardship. And if traveling with kids is so difficult that you simply must placate them with devices the whole time then maybe don't travel so much. It's optional.

Oh, I'll let my friend who just flew her kids down to FL because her mother died unexpectedly that that trip was optional.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was on a 3-hour flight. Packed books, toys, cards and travel games to engage our preschooler and elementary schooler. Spent the rest of the time talking, reading quietly together, closing our eyes. Walked down the aisle a few times for bathroom trips, and each time, every single other family - kid on iPad, parent scrolling X or Instagram on their phone.

What gives?

(Ready for flames for being holier-than-thou, but seriously, what gives? Travel time is great for talking and engaging)

Shrug. I do the same for my 2 year old. Every time we’ve flown I’ve gotten comments from my neighbors how surprised they are I can keep DS quiet and engaged without screens. He’s definitely sitting still - he climbs all over his seat and me but he stays quiet and does not disturb other passengers. But I also don’t judge the other parents for using screens.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And I don’t know what time of time she spends with her kids but anyone who spends a lot of time with one another doesn’t need to talk on the plane. It is more people who don’t see one another much would be the ones who want to spend all this quality time together on the plane.

My neighbor is a SAhM to 4 kids. She spends all day everyday with the kids. She is just trying to survive the flight.

I talk to my spouse and kids at home but uh we also talk on planes. Not like nonstop or anything but we'll have a conversation.

I don't get the whole "I'm just trying to survive the flight" thing either. Flying is not that difficult. Sure there are times when it's a huge hassle -- if you are on a flight that got delayed or you wind up with some huge annoyance like getting stuck on the tarmac for an hour before take off or horrible turbulence. But most flights are just... fine. I'm not in crisis and reaching for iPads to shut up kids because otherwise I just won't make it. And that includes on international flights. Kids will watch devices some (on an international flight usually at least one movie and if a very long flight of 10+ at least two). But also we will talk and play games and read.

Travel is not some horrible hardship. And if traveling with kids is so difficult that you simply must placate them with devices the whole time then maybe don't travel so much. It's optional.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And I don’t know what time of time she spends with her kids but anyone who spends a lot of time with one another doesn’t need to talk on the plane. It is more people who don’t see one another much would be the ones who want to spend all this quality time together on the plane.

My neighbor is a SAhM to 4 kids. She spends all day everyday with the kids. She is just trying to survive the flight.

I talk to my spouse and kids at home but uh we also talk on planes. Not like nonstop or anything but we'll have a conversation.

I don't get the whole "I'm just trying to survive the flight" thing either. Flying is not that difficult. Sure there are times when it's a huge hassle -- if you are on a flight that got delayed or you wind up with some huge annoyance like getting stuck on the tarmac for an hour before take off or horrible turbulence. But most flights are just... fine. I'm not in crisis and reaching for iPads to shut up kids because otherwise I just won't make it. And that includes on international flights. Kids will watch devices some (on an international flight usually at least one movie and if a very long flight of 10+ at least two). But also we will talk and play games and read.

Travel is not some horrible hardship. And if traveling with kids is so difficult that you simply must placate them with devices the whole time then maybe don't travel so much. It's optional.

Oh, I'll let my friend who just flew her kids down to FL because her mother died unexpectedly that that trip was optional.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planes are not the time for conversation! If you and your spouse fly together someplace are you chatting? No! You’re watching Netflix or plane entertainment.

Yes I chat with my spouse on the plane all the time. We also read and watch movies. Do you think everyone is supposed to be silent the entire time on a plane?

NP. As quiet as possible, yes. You might need to have a hushed conversation with someone, but unnecessary talking is rude. No one wants to hear your conversation, people are trying to read, trying to sleep, and you're jabbering away like a monkey. It's loathsome.

THIS! I hate plane talkers. I bet PP is one of those people who talks to strangers on planes too.

I love a good airport bar chat and am hardly antisocial, but once on the plane, STFU.