Anonymous
Post 06/11/2024 10:46     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Many many jobs require approval for vacation time - you think doctors can just take off whenever they want? Or teachers? Or chefs, store managers, nursing home staff, or the thousands of other jobs that require vacation time is coordinated with the needs of the organization.

Yes OP should have said vacation time needs coordination/ approval, but overall it’s not an unreasonable requirement to have of your nanny and doesn’t make them “a slave”. I don’t think anyone is claiming is abusive to required pediatric surgeons to get approval for their vacation time to make sure the needs of their employer is met
Anonymous
Post 06/11/2024 05:52     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
This was a completely avoidable problem. Just put in your nanny contract that "Nanny X gets X number of days of paid time off to be selected at mutually convenient day with their employer." That means they tell you first and get their feedback. This is standard employment contract language.

And if those 10 weeks are so essential to employment, employer should have communicated that to the nanny too.
Anonymous
Post 06/11/2024 03:46     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP -- maybe change jobs to something part time and try raising your own children for once?


I’m not OP, but it always makes me laugh when nannies talk shit like this here. If all MBs became SAHMs, you’d be unemployed.


The plus is that nannies would get much better jobs and children would profit by having their mothers take care of them as they should.


What stops them getting better jobs now, if that’s an available option?
Anonymous
Post 06/10/2024 22:08     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP -- maybe change jobs to something part time and try raising your own children for once?


I’m not OP, but it always makes me laugh when nannies talk shit like this here. If all MBs became SAHMs, you’d be unemployed.


The plus is that nannies would get much better jobs and children would profit by having their mothers take care of them as they should.
Anonymous
Post 06/10/2024 20:24     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:She gave you two months notice.


Plus 1.

She owes you nothing.
You sound entitled.
Anonymous
Post 06/10/2024 20:23     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
2 months vacation notice is more than plenty of time. You are the one that sounds entitled and unreasonable. I’m surprised she has been with you for this long.
Anonymous
Post 06/10/2024 19:32     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:I think this is a communication issue. She's worked for your family for years and you presume she knows the family's needs, i.e., summer time coverage. From her end she thinks she's giving you plenty of notice with 2 months to go.

This is obviously eating at you. And I would be similarly annoyed since she's not asking for the time off; she's counting on it. I'd have a conversation about it, and point out the disconnect. If you think you want to keep her in the future, make it explicit about no vacation time during the kids' breaks, or that they need prior approval before she books anything.


Do this and be prepared for her to quit. Nannies are not slaves who have to grovel and beg for vacation to r THAT THEY HAVE EARNED! This is OP's fault because she had to have known many months ago that she needed the nanny in August. She did nothing and the nanny cannot read her mind. So tough toodles for OP!

Anonymous
Post 06/10/2024 19:21     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:Nanny of many years mentioned last week shes doing a girls trip for 2 weeks in August.
I’m opening another office for my company same time so not only is it summer break- when my kids are home from school and I need her most- but I’m traveling this time frame.
I’m really pissed she didn’t even mention before she made this trip plan. I feel like she should have discussed this with us. We basically pay her year round to have her for summer when kids home from school.
And this isn’t trip with her kids (I would understand that if she booked a trip when her kids were home from school )—- but this is a girls trip.
Am I fair in thinking she should have discussed with us?
I mean- honestly my boss wouldn’t have looked kindly on me taking off right when I’m opening an office- so I think most people consider their employee when planning trip… at least to some degree.


You knew that you needed her in August and you should have discussed vacation plans months ago. Your bad.
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 21:47     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:OP -- maybe change jobs to something part time and try raising your own children for once?


I’m not OP, but it always makes me laugh when nannies talk shit like this here. If all MBs became SAHMs, you’d be unemployed.
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 19:29     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
OP -- maybe change jobs to something part time and try raising your own children for once?
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 19:13     Subject: Re:Nanny planned vacation without discussing
What kind of girls trip is 2 weeks long? This is odd, especially considering the nanny is a mom herself. Most people cut way back on friend trips when they have a family because they prioritize vacationing with their kids.
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 13:48     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
The nanny knows that summer is the most pressing time of year for childcare. You need to communicate that it’s not a good time for a vacation and start looking for a replacement.

I think the entire point of having a nanny is to have someone who works around your schedule. Leaving during your busiest time of year means you’re paying a premium for a service you’re not getting. I would reconsider the nanny altogether.

If you can get through opening an office without her, you don’t need her.
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 13:25     Subject: Re:Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:It really depends. Do you have it in your contract that she needs to have her vacation approved by you? I don't ask my boss for time off, I tell her when I'm taking it.


This. I have to get my leave days approved before taking them. My nanny has to get hers approved by me. In practice there are always instances when she picks a bad time to take a vacation and we say yes anyway because we value her as an employee, but there isn’t this lack of agency in the decision that the Op has.
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 13:17     Subject: Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:I disagree that its reasonable. She planned to be gone for 2 weeks coincidentally with the time of year her workload as a nanny is highest-summer school break? Girls trips can happen any time of year. She did it on purpose to get out of working.


First you don't know that girls trips can happen anytime.

Second isn't the whole point of vacations is to..not work?
Anonymous
Post 06/06/2024 13:15     Subject: Re:Nanny planned vacation without discussing
Anonymous wrote:I mean, if my kids were in school full time and I was paying for a full time nanny year round, I would discuss in any interview and write in the contract that they could not take time off during the kids' summer break except for X week when my family is on vacation. You basically need her for 10 weeks a year and she is gone for two of them? I'd look for someone new.


Yeah this part strikes me as pretty egregious. I guarantee plenty of other Nannie’s would be happy to take full time year round pay and give up 10 weeks of summer.