Anonymous wrote:To me, there is a big difference between having sexual encounters as a couple with another couple in a private setting vs going to a sex club where there are lots of people. The former seems to be more of sexual exploration. I would imagine the latter is more for people who have exhibitionist tendencies?

both scenarios are immoral

I also date only attractive men, but it takes 6 moths to sift through the plevel to find what I want on a combination of looks and being an interesting person to date. I cannot imagine seeing a random man and wanting sex with him on a spot, never happened to me in entire life!

It takes six whole "moths", huh? You should use some of this time to buy a spellchecking app.

80% of US population at any age group is just unattractive, and DMV area is full of boring ugly paperpushers of both genders. And no, it's not true that your DH can easily find a beautiful chick on a side. The market is vast, but it's full of subpar product.

We need to see a site for this "80% of the population" statistic. How do you know it is not easy for someone's DH to find a beautiful chick, either on the side or right out in front?

How do you know you are not the "subpar product"? Do not say it is because men hit on you. We have all established that multiple men hitting on a woman does not ensure she is even decent, let alone attractive.

Anonymous wrote:What might make this more appealing / possible for many married women would be a one-time tryst with another person/couple at a vacation resort.

This scenario would remove nearly any possibility of “being found out.”

It would also reduce the chance of continued attachment to someone outside the marriage. Safer-sex would, of course, be a prerequisite.

That’s why women do it all the time on “girls trips.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tried it with a previous serious bf. He was mostly pushing it. It ended up backfiring completely.

What happened? Is that what ended the relationship?

DP and based on several years worth of reading free online erotica, what happens in these situations is that the woman has a fabulous time with a fabulous new partner and her old partner feels jealous, insecure, and also pathetically turned on. Usually the story ends with the old partner sitting outside the room alone listening as he hears his wife/girlfriend having the time of her life.

Anonymous wrote:I tried it with a previous serious bf. He was mostly pushing it. It ended up backfiring completely.

What happened? Is that what ended the relationship?

What might make this more appealing / possible for many married women would be a one-time tryst with another person/couple at a vacation resort.

This scenario would remove nearly any possibility of “being found out.”

It would also reduce the chance of continued attachment to someone outside the marriage. Safer-sex would, of course, be a prerequisite.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My first husband was into sex clubs and I was aiming to please so I went along. He really got into it but all I felt like was a piece of meat. I’m not a prude but multiple partners of both sexes was just not my thing. I remarried 20 years ago and I’m happy to live a monogamous lifestyle.

I honestly cannot do it with multiple partners one after the other.
And I know this can be interpreted in a bad way, but if I am going to have sex with another person, I don't want my DH to be there.

Wt chain bangs w your hubby watching?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am that weird man in the modern era. I will never be able to have sex with my wife again if she lets another man fu**k her. And for the swingy women out there, it doesn't bother you seeing your man giving it the another woman on all 4s. Ya'll are a bunch of sexually liberated people let me tell ya lol

You are Not weird, you are Normal. These are not sexually liberated people, these are people without morals

Ok, grandma, you spoke your piece but, now will you PLEASE GO TO BED?!?

What a clumsy retort. Swinging is generally something the olds do.
It's not a young person's activity.

Grandma, sigh. STILL awake??

You might want to stop digging that hole, love. You look and sound ridiculous.

I tried it with a previous serious bf. He was mostly pushing it. It ended up backfiring completely.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course she wasn't enthused. This means the end of a normal relationship. A family therapist once told my husband that in his experience, absolutely all couples who did that ended up divorcing.

Your wife now knows that you are cheating.

That’s dumb. My husband and I have been non-monogamous for 15 years and are still happily married.

You are fringe and completely abnormal.

And that isn’t a virtue.

Oh, you’d be surprised. I’ve met people of every profession, class, race, and religion in the lifestyle. Doctors, lawyers, professors, diplomats, finance, tech, media, etc. it’s going on right under your nose and you’ve no idea. You couldn’t pick us out of a crowd.

NP

I believe this is probably closer to reality. It’s logical; “what happens in swinging, stays in swinging.”

In a puritanical culture, like say, Iran, I would imagine they would make a public example of someone caught doing this, as a deterrent.

But the USA? Society does not much care what consenting adults do with other consenting adults in private.

Everyone knows it would blow up your world if close friends and family knew. So people keep quiet.

I’d bet it’s not uncommon.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am that weird man in the modern era. I will never be able to have sex with my wife again if she lets another man fu**k her. And for the swingy women out there, it doesn't bother you seeing your man giving it the another woman on all 4s. Ya'll are a bunch of sexually liberated people let me tell ya lol

You are Not weird, you are Normal. These are not sexually liberated people, these are people without morals

Ok, grandma, you spoke your piece but, now will you PLEASE GO TO BED?!?

What a clumsy retort. Swinging is generally something the olds do.
It's not a young person's activity.

Grandma, sigh. STILL awake??

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you or your partner ever brought this up as an idea? I casually brought it up to mine and she wasn’t too enthused…

Unless you look like a Calvin Klein model, asking to swing is stupid. Your partner will get countless opportunities while you will have a difficult time finding anyone.

Yes, it would be much easier for women to find men who desire them than other way around. I rarely see any attractive men in their 40-50s I would want to f..k, leaving alone in such circumstances. And I'm not attracted to other women. So a hard no for me

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am that weird man in the modern era. I will never be able to have sex with my wife again if she lets another man fu**k her. And for the swingy women out there, it doesn't bother you seeing your man giving it the another woman on all 4s. Ya'll are a bunch of sexually liberated people let me tell ya lol

You are Not weird, you are Normal. These are not sexually liberated people, these are people without morals

Ok, grandma, you spoke your piece but, now will you PLEASE GO TO BED?!?

What a clumsy retort. Swinging is generally something the olds do. It's not a young person's activity.

Anonymous wrote:Don't. We tried. We were currently waiting for divorce paperwork to be finalized.

I imagine if you're at a point in your marriage where this gets floated as a hail mary, it's not the swinging that caused the divorce.

Anonymous wrote:Have you or your partner ever brought this up as an idea? I casually brought it up to mine and she wasn’t too enthused…

Unless you look like a Calvin Klein model, asking to swing is stupid. Your partner will get countless opportunities while you will have a difficult time finding anyone.