Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Anonymous wrote:For all you saying that having kids is selfish, that is only true on a social levels, perhaps, if you are obsessed about global warming. On a personal level, in terms of personal growth and development, having kids is absolutely a lesson in humility and self sacrifice. I can't think of anything else more selfless than everything we parents do for our kids on a daily basis.

Anonymous wrote:
Parenting is an experience that some people would like to have and other people would not. No judgment either way.

Anonymous wrote:You can throw money at people like they do in many countries and they still won't have kids.
I have 5 childless family members (mid to late 30s) who all have good jobs and houses. One of them is unable to find a partner due to ASD and ridiculously high standards. The others have given the following reasons:
1. "We're not done having adventures yet. Maybe someday when we feel like we've traveled enough"
2. "I still feel like a kid myself and that's just way too much responsibility. We love going out and then sleeping in every weekend"
3. "Global warming, plus none of our friends have any and it would be weird to be the first. We couldn't hang out anymore"
4. "We definitely want to maybe 5 years from now after we've done our bucket list trips"
So in my family no amount of money can top the allure of global travel and FOMO. I have no idea what could be done politically about that.

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids and cost of living are too expensive if you have a job in a top 15 metro area. About 100m Americans live in the top 15 metro areas, or about 30% of the country.

At current interest rates, a 31 year-old Millennial couple (peak baby birthing time) need a household income of $250K to buy a decent home an acceptable school district, two cars, daycare, student loan payment, retirement contribution, plus weekly expenses (food, diapers, medical costs, utilities, etc.) AND not feel completely on edge of losing it.

At a $250K HHI, you're already at the 92nd percentile of American households. But 30% of Americans live in a top 15 metro area and are dealing with a huge run up in RE prices and now interest rates.

How is a 31 year-old Millennial couple supposed to buy their first home and have a baby? It's literally not possible unless they are pulling in $250K or have family $$$$.

The math doesn't math. I'd skip kids too. We got lucky in that we are elder Millennials who bought in 2017.

We make $500K today and there's no way we could afford our current house at the current prices and interest rate without a lot of pain and skimpy budgets by the end of the month.

Meh, I think the anxiety of this upcoming generation is really strong and leads to the idea that they need everything in its place. It's just not reasonable. Probably access to too much information has led to this.

You don't need to own a home at 31. Used cars work great. I think people' priorities are a bit focused on things rather than family. And thats ok; it's just different.

But you can raise kids just fine on 100-150k starting out while you work towards making that 250k HHI.

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids and cost of living are too expensive if you have a job in a top 15 metro area. About 100m Americans live in the top 15 metro areas, or about 30% of the country.

At current interest rates, a 31 year-old Millennial couple (peak baby birthing time) need a household income of $250K to buy a decent home an acceptable school district, two cars, daycare, student loan payment, retirement contribution, plus weekly expenses (food, diapers, medical costs, utilities, etc.) AND not feel completely on edge of losing it.

At a $250K HHI, you're already at the 92nd percentile of American households. But 30% of Americans live in a top 15 metro area and are dealing with a huge run up in RE prices and now interest rates.

How is a 31 year-old Millennial couple supposed to buy their first home and have a baby? It's literally not possible unless they are pulling in $250K or have family $$$$.

The math doesn't math. I'd skip kids too. We got lucky in that we are elder Millennials who bought in 2017.

We make $500K today and there's no way we could afford our current house at the current prices and interest rate without a lot of pain and skimpy budgets by the end of the month.

Meh, I think the anxiety of this upcoming generation is really strong and leads to the idea that they need everything in its place. It's just not reasonable. Probably access to too much information has led to this.

You don't need to own a home at 31. Used cars work great. I think people' priorities are a bit focused on things rather than family. And thats ok; it's just different.

But you can raise kids just fine on 100-150k starting out while you work towards making that 250k HHI.

Sorry, but you SHOULD have settled housing when you start a family. That means housing you will be able to afford for the next 5-7 years while you are in the toughest early years for child rearing. Moving homes or living at the whim of a landlord is incredibly difficult when you have young kids. I know people do it....but it's not how most Americans envision starting a family.

People who actively plan for children want a stable home and job situation. The current economic environment is way too unstable, hence why you see the drop in fertility.

Older Americans have no one to blame but themselves for this predicament. They have been in power and setting economic policies for the last 3-4 decades. This is not a country that values the things that matter to families - affordable safe housing, decent public schools, affordable childcare, and a robust healthcare safety net.

The message projected to young Americans is "why should we pay for your kid?".....then don't expect them to have kids. The social contract in the U.S. is broken.

Anonymous wrote:I was an only child and there wasn't really enough money for just a 1 kid family.

I was sick of doing without and so after college I focused on travel. NO WAY was I going to be trapped with kids in my 20s.

I had 1 kid at 40. In many ways I felt my life ended then.