OP here. I am not talking about 4 kid families. To qualify for this discussion, you must have at least 8-10 children (and ideally born within a 10 year time span; ie you are popping out child after child).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im fascinated by big families! I only have one child, and I dont have instagram, but if I did im sure I would watch this content! Its just such an odd concept to me to have more than say 5 kids. How do they feed them? Where do they live? What type of activities do they do? Are the kids happy? I have so many questions. I dont know any of these families in real life, so I can understand that their might be a market to view from afar (and judge).

Here: I have six so I'll answer some of your questions. Two are step kids that live with us full time, and two are adults and out of the house so we have four at home. Our table seats ten and the kids take turns having to set the table and play sous chef, and we live in an apartment. Three share a room, and one has a (small-ish) room to themselves. They do the activities they like - one does a lot of plays, one does dance and school newspaper, etc. They are overall happy, and like all kids get upset sometimes. I am not on Instagram and can't imagine putting my kids on there publicly for strangers to see/judge, or to make money off my kids.

So, the kids are crammed in one room and have to do everything themselves like cook. They only get basic school activities. I think you just proved the concerns.

NP here. I hope I never meet you IRL, PP. you are truly awful.

+1

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Anonymous wrote:The time to take a bow would be after all those kids are launched, after everyone gets into college or gets a good paying job after some kind of training program, or after they are all married and have a home, etc.

What makes you think they all launch well? DH is from a family of four and only half of them are well off financially. The other two struggled with bankruptcies, bills, etc.

Four isn't "huge" so clearly it's not only large families that fail to launch. I think you just demonstrated that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im fascinated by big families! I only have one child, and I dont have instagram, but if I did im sure I would watch this content! Its just such an odd concept to me to have more than say 5 kids. How do they feed them? Where do they live? What type of activities do they do? Are the kids happy? I have so many questions. I dont know any of these families in real life, so I can understand that their might be a market to view from afar (and judge).

My friend has three and has to go to the grocery store every other day to feed them.

The horror of feeding your family fresh food

Oh, it’s not fresh food. It’s usually processed, because it’s hard to cook from scratch for such a large group, and not the best quality because it’s expensive.

There’s nothing fun having to haul bags of groceries every other day and one can’t even stock up for a week of vacation because of sheer quantity.

plus the natural resources are getting depleted at alarming rate.

Stop just yapping. Just like small families, some large families place a priority on cooking and eating fresh food, and some don't. I find it's actually more motivating to cook from scratch for a larger group because the alternative (like takeout or buying school lunches) is very expensive for more kids and it's easier to invest time in cooking a fresh meal when lots of people are going to enjoy it versus two empty nesters. I have 6 kids and cook 4-5 full family dinners a week, usually making a double batch so my kids can take leftovers for lunch. I cook more than most parents with two kids that I know. If you can't figure out the grocery store and have invested so much thought in having to "haul bags of groceries every other day and one can’t even stock up for a week of vacation because of sheer quantity" and you think that's what makes a large family hard, it is 100% definitely out of your abilities.
The only thing you said that makes any sense is regarding the environmental impact, but that's not the topic at hand. It's just an additional jab you've thrown in.
Maybe try being a little more open minded? You clearly have no clue what it's like to manage groceries if you think it's impossible to shop at one time for a week, nor do you have any intention to listen to people who actually do have experience. I may not be a perfect parent, but at least my kids are kind and open minded to other family dynamics.

Anonymous wrote:The time to take a bow would be after all those kids are launched, after everyone gets into college or gets a good paying job after some kind of training program, or after they are all married and have a home, etc.

What makes you think they all launch well? DH is from a family of four and only half of them are well off financially. The other two struggled with bankruptcies, bills, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im fascinated by big families! I only have one child, and I dont have instagram, but if I did im sure I would watch this content! Its just such an odd concept to me to have more than say 5 kids. How do they feed them? Where do they live? What type of activities do they do? Are the kids happy? I have so many questions. I dont know any of these families in real life, so I can understand that their might be a market to view from afar (and judge).

My friend has three and has to go to the grocery store every other day to feed them.

The horror of feeding your family fresh food

Oh, it’s not fresh food. It’s usually processed, because it’s hard to cook from scratch for such a large group, and not the best quality because it’s expensive.

There’s nothing fun having to haul bags of groceries every other day and one can’t even stock up for a week of vacation because of sheer quantity.

plus the natural resources are getting depleted at alarming rate.

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Anonymous wrote:My child psych professor in college said that more than 3 kids make it a daycare, not a family. She came from a big family.

I’m one of four and had an idyllic childhood. I think it depends on resources. My parents are also highly educated. We all went to private school, did private music and sports lessons and whatever activities we wanted. We are all three years apart and my mon stayed home until youngest went to school so that probably helped.

I must run in jaded circles but I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone call their own childhood idyllic.

Maybe? I had a great childhood. I have great parents and I loved growing up in a big family. It was fun and exciting. Somebody always had a friend over and there was always someone to play with. Our grandparents lived nearby and we were close to them. My mom was very dedicated to our academics and spent a lot of time with us to ensure we thrived at school, got us tutors when needed. She also made it a priority that we participated in good extracurriculars/lessons from a young age and went to great sleepaway camps in the summer. We really enjoyed our family vacations together. We laughed a lot. A huge part of this lifestyle is one spouse being a high earner. That unlocks a lot of flexibility and resources. My husband and I both work and aren’t ultra high income, so I’m not able to replicate the experience I had for my own kids- and I don’t have 4 of them. But with the right parental attention, resources, and spacing, a reasonably large family can thrive.

\

You had a great childhood but, how about your mom?

Did she have a good life? Get to experience fun stuff that she wanted to enjoy? have time for friends?

My mom went back to work when I was 5 years old. Her career was flexible but she worked very hard and recently retired. It was a meaningful job to her. She generally loves to work, so she loved raising us and having her career. She has tons of friends and is really beloved in the community I grew up. She’s a very special person. If you ask her, she would say she wishes she’d had two more kids (but my dad was DONE after four.)

Your mom seems like a high achiever! Good for her.

Also,to the PP above, it’s silly to ask whether she had a good life . She chose to have 4 kids, obviously her idea of a good life is life spent surrounded by kids. I have the same idea though I am not a high achiever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im fascinated by big families! I only have one child, and I dont have instagram, but if I did im sure I would watch this content! Its just such an odd concept to me to have more than say 5 kids. How do they feed them? Where do they live? What type of activities do they do? Are the kids happy? I have so many questions. I dont know any of these families in real life, so I can understand that their might be a market to view from afar (and judge).

Here: I have six so I'll answer some of your questions. Two are step kids that live with us full time, and two are adults and out of the house so we have four at home. Our table seats ten and the kids take turns having to set the table and play sous chef, and we live in an apartment. Three share a room, and one has a (small-ish) room to themselves. They do the activities they like - one does a lot of plays, one does dance and school newspaper, etc. They are overall happy, and like all kids get upset sometimes. I am not on Instagram and can't imagine putting my kids on there publicly for strangers to see/judge, or to make money off my kids.

So, the kids are crammed in one room and have to do everything themselves like cook. They only get basic school activities. I think you just proved the concerns.

NP here. I hope I never meet you IRL, PP. you are truly awful.