Anonymous
03/16/2024 14:59
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Of course
Anonymous
03/16/2024 14:58
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:No, because people are reasonable and when you tell them where you come from, they integrate it.
HOWEVER, I am the author of the thread about a staff member at my child's school who insists on assuming that every vaguely Asian-looking kid is Chinese. She doesn't even ask! She calls my daughter's friend "the Chinese girl", and has kept it up, asking my daughter whether they can talk to a Chinese exchange student under the assumption they share the same native language. She just doesn't seem to be all there, to be honest. After a year of this, the kids are getting irritated (none of them are of Chinese heritage).
This is very common with Asians.
Many Americans are ignorant when it comes to the rest of the world. Our news coverage feeds into that (every situation is presented in light of our interests).
Anonymous
03/16/2024 14:54
Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:A friend of mine has a very ambiguous racially look. And when I'm out with her, it is amazing how many different nationalities of people come up to her and speak in their language to her assuming she can speak it. She just smiles and lets them know she does not speak the language.
This is sweet and seems to be from a place of wanting to include your friend. I don’t really understand though generally why anyone has to guess my ethnicity. Like, why is it a topic of conversation?
Why is it off limits/sensitive?
It is just part of your story . Why take offense?
Anonymous
03/16/2024 12:12
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
My husband is often mistaken for being Jewish. He generally finds it amusing but it has led to some awkward social moments. Like when he got invited by a Jewish senior manager in his company to a Jewish holiday event at his home (who seemed to assume my husband was also Jewish), how do you respond?
Anonymous
03/16/2024 09:19
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
It really depends on who is asking and the context for it to be offensive. A waiter once said namaste to my husband who is not Indian. When he said he’s American the waiter said no way, you don’t look American. My husband is a veteran with two deployments in combat zones and is from New York. That was so hurtful and very offensive and when he told the waiter that, he said geez don’t be so sensitive.
Anonymous
03/16/2024 09:07
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:if they are trying to make a connection, then no. If they are trying to put me in a box then yes. It is of no business of anyone else. My job is not to satisfy your curiosity.
This is it exactly.
Anonymous
03/16/2024 09:05
Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:A friend of mine has a very ambiguous racially look. And when I'm out with her, it is amazing how many different nationalities of people come up to her and speak in their language to her assuming she can speak it. She just smiles and lets them know she does not speak the language.
This is sweet and seems to be from a place of wanting to include your friend. I don’t really understand though generally why anyone has to guess my ethnicity. Like, why is it a topic of conversation?
Anonymous
03/16/2024 09:02
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:Guessing my ethnicity doesn't bother me.
What bothers me is when someone says I look "exotic". Or when I tell them "I'm just Black" and they want specific heritage info. Usually this is a White person who doesn't seem to get that a lot of Black Americans can't trace their heritage for centuries as easily as a White person may be able to.
I mean, yeah, I can do an ancestry DNA test that shows what parts of Africa my ancestors came from, but ultmately, I have no connection to those places. It's not like my grandmother came from there and told me stories about "back home". A lot of Black and Brown people don't have that luxury.
Most white people cannot trace their "heritage" very easily. Why do you think they can?
Anonymous
03/16/2024 08:56
Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:People assume I’m Christian when I am not. They also often guess Irish. Nope, Jew of Ashkenazi / Eastern European extraction. It only bothered me when I was dating, because I wanted to date and marry within my religion. It was never a big deal though.
I have a friend who is blond and pasty white, with the most white bread name you can find, but Muslim. I have always wondered what kind of reactions he gets if people assume he’s Christian and if he corrects them. But I have never asked. And maybe he doesn’t correct them anyway, because in most contexts it wouldn’t matter.
I’m guessing you’re a redhead? My half Ashkenazi redheaded dd gets asked if she’s Irish.
No, brown hair actually, but fair skin and green eyes so I guess that does it.
Red hair is actually not uncommon among Ashkenazim, I guess because of the small gene pool.
I have red hair and people think I'm Irish, but I'm not. The Vikings traveled far!
Anonymous
03/16/2024 08:52
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
I'm American and avoid obese Americans when traveling abroad because there's a high correlation between being big and being loud/rude and or not really knowing how to travel abroad politely. Especially if they look White Texan.
Anonymous
03/16/2024 08:24
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
I know this isn’t the same but I’m easily identified as midwestern and it makes me cringe a little.
Anonymous
03/15/2024 22:48
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
I only get offended when they want to argue with me after I tell them what my ethnicity actually is. Some people seem unable to grasp that they do not actually know what my background is - but that I do.
Anonymous
03/15/2024 19:57
Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:People speak Spanish to me all the time because they assume I'm Hispanic. If I got offended by that would that mean that I consider Hispanics less than me?
Anyway, of course I don't get offended. It is motivating me to want to learn Spanish though.
same here, this happened when i lives in so cali all the time
Anonymous
03/15/2024 14:30
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Guessing my ethnicity doesn't bother me.
What bothers me is when someone says I look "exotic". Or when I tell them "I'm just Black" and they want specific heritage info. Usually this is a White person who doesn't seem to get that a lot of Black Americans can't trace their heritage for centuries as easily as a White person may be able to.
I mean, yeah, I can do an ancestry DNA test that shows what parts of Africa my ancestors came from, but ultmately, I have no connection to those places. It's not like my grandmother came from there and told me stories about "back home". A lot of Black and Brown people don't have that luxury.
What bothers me is when someone says I look "exotic". Or when I tell them "I'm just Black" and they want specific heritage info. Usually this is a White person who doesn't seem to get that a lot of Black Americans can't trace their heritage for centuries as easily as a White person may be able to.
I mean, yeah, I can do an ancestry DNA test that shows what parts of Africa my ancestors came from, but ultmately, I have no connection to those places. It's not like my grandmother came from there and told me stories about "back home". A lot of Black and Brown people don't have that luxury.
Anonymous
03/15/2024 11:21
Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:If that offended me I’d constantly be offended. I’m a mutt, all 4 grandparents (or their parents) were immigrants from different places, and DH is also an immigrant. My kid has 4 citizenships.
I have more important things to worry about. I figure most people are just making conversation.
That is so cool! did you actually acquire the citizenship in all four countries? What # of passports does your child have?
It would be easy for you leave this country if a sh!tstorm erupts.