At 20 my parents never, ever knew what I was doing. Nor I them.

Adulthood.

Op, I think your husband is being naive to think that with money/status comes safety. And no way would I think "well gee, as long as my daughter is with high profile people, I don't need to know where she is." That's weird.

I agree with this. The "high profile" thing would make me less, not more, comfortable. People make very weird assumptions and excuse all kinds of odd things when money and status are involved. No one wants to offend or inconvenience VIPs. Basic safety issues can get ignored, sometimes one member of the "high profile" family is a weirdo (oh that's just "Uncle Joe"), etc. Uber-wealthy folks are used to not being questioned. For me, that wouldn't extend to taking my kid somewhere out of the country. I'm the parent of a young adult in their group, not their household staff. If there was an issue with me reaching out to confirm plans and exchange contact info for an intl trip, that's a red flag I wouldn't ignore and DD wouldn't go. I'm struck that this isn't common sense for this parenting crowd. Money isn't everything, folks.

Op - love your post! This is very juicy and entertaining.

Your dd is clearly in for a good time time.

Anonymous wrote:It’s MEC; BB; Lyford

Necker?

Just track her on her phone like everyone else does.

Kris Jenner's kids are all older than yours OP and much more high profile than whoever your DD's friend is, and I guarantee you when they leave the country Kris knows exactly where each of her adult kids is staying.

In OP's defense, she has reason to mention that these people are "high profile" in that for one, he husband thinks their status will keep their daughter safe and second, as a way to explain the odd secrecy/no social media issue.

Op, I think your husband is being naive to think that with money/status comes safety. And no way would I think "well gee, as long as my daughter is with high profile people, I don't need to know where she is." That's weird.

Yes she's an adult. But also parents usually (usually) know where their 20 year olds are going to be in the world, so the friend's family will most likely be totally fine with giving you the details.

I'd ask for the number of one of the parents and send them a text that goes along the lines of "just wanted to reach out and thank you for taking DD on your vacation this summer, she is really looking forward to it. I wanted to share my number in the event you need to reach me.
Not a big deal to do a quick reach.

Anonymous wrote:You’re exhausting, OP. What does the fact that your daughter and this friend attending a “highly selective” college and doing well there have to do with this situation? Something tells me you would make your way into your kid’s high school just to decorate her locker. Get a life.

+1

Jeez….the bragging on DCUM just seems to get worse by the day.

My adult son also attends an elite private university in the Boston area and has lots of friends who come from very rich families. He’s gone on vacation with them and he tells me the location just in case something happens. Also his cell phone has international service so no big deal.

Anonymous wrote:You could have asked this question without all the high-profile family details. Reasonable to ask your adult child for some itinerary basics.

+1

OP comes across like one big humble brag. But then again this is DCUM and humble brags are par for the course. Does your daughter have a mobile phone with international service?

So did you reach out to J’s parents when she came to your beach house?

The funny thing is that if she was a child, of course she would ask where they're staying because she'd need to tell you. And if she was an adult, of course she would ask where they're staying because adults don't go blindly on vacations without knowing where. But she's 20. So...Free vacay!

But yeah, most parents of young adults would want to know where their kids are and the other parents understand that. There's seriously no reason for your dd to feel weird about asking.

Anonymous wrote:It’s MEC; BB; Lyford

Lyford isn’t the kind of place that has controls on what you put on social media. That means it’s more likely to be the much more exclusive Bahamas community which has lots of celebrities in it. Don’t worry OP, it’s very nice and very safe.

Take a breath OP and release. Agree your DH is kind of gross for seeing this as networking