Anonymous wrote:I appreciate that this can be a real problem but the suggestion that siblings need to be completely banned from public settings is unhinged.

Can you quote who said siblings should be banned? Pretty much universally this is people taking a "siblings only" invite then RSVPing for 4 people. Weird that people are so incredulous that this has ever happened and arguing that the host must have forgotten to say "no siblings".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

But are you writing NO SIBLINGS on the invitation?

Just stop. Its ok to to say you have no experience with the topic.

I have- we receive invitations that specifically tell people ONLY the named child is invited. They are spelling it out for a reason. It works.

You still haven't said whether you do this.

I have, yet people ignore and bring extra people. People are also known to bring gifts to "no gifts necessary" parties too. Shocking, right?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve brought siblings to Chuck E Cheese style parties a couple of times BUT I would never dream of asking the host family to have siblings join the party, let alone pay for them! I always pay for their entry and food and goodies and entertain them away from the actual party (and yes, it’s in cases where I do not have alternate childcare).

What does this have to do w you deciding to take your other (non invited) kids to a bday party venue? Why not just drop the invited kid off and go home w your other kids? Why do you need childcare at all? Wouldn’t you be taking care of your kids regardless of whether one is attending a party or not?

If it’s a public space, she’s got every right to bring her other kid and pay for their admission and entertain them away from the party (ie not expect food or goodie bags). How is this possibly construed as rude?

I appreciate that this can be a real problem but the suggestion that siblings need to be completely banned from public settings is unhinged.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

But are you writing NO SIBLINGS on the invitation?

Just stop. Its ok to to say you have no experience with the topic.

I have- we receive invitations that specifically tell people ONLY the named child is invited. They are spelling it out for a reason. It works.

You still haven't said whether you do this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

But are you writing NO SIBLINGS on the invitation?

Just stop. Its ok to to say you have no experience with the topic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

But are you writing NO SIBLINGS on the invitation?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

People who would actually drop off a sibling at your door do not care if it’s an imposition? So make a scene and tell them to come get their effing kid!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One particular party was at a venue. It's a knock off version of sky zone in my town. You rent the whole place for the party and provide your own food. I assume parents know you're not paying per person so they assume it's ok to bring siblings or something. We had a party there several years ago and so many siblings came. AND their parents allowed them to take goodie bags. I didn't plan on twice the number of freaking goodie bags. Invited kids didn't even get one because parents let their 3 year old siblings take them.


That really chapped my hide.

Chapped your hide? Gtfoh

You gtfoh and take your toddler with you please.

[quote=Anonymous]I had this happen ten years ago when our kids were young. It used to confuse me, as well.

Maybe it's because I'm an older mom, but I think it's an important life lesson for kids to learn that they are not invited to everything, and that their sibling is allowed to have their own friends, and their own events, where they are not included. It's about teaching your child a little bit of humility (how to deal with occasional rejection or non-inclusion), and boundaries, as a future adult.

When one of my kids had a birthday party to attend, I dropped them off. Then younger sibling and I went to do something in the meantime. These are important life lessons.[/quote]

I have an only child so I don't have any experience with this. But my sibling never came to my friends bday parties. Ever.

One family we were really close with (until recently) has a son same age as mine. I always found it frustrating for play dates, that if little sister was sick or something, big brother had to stay home too (even when I'd offer to come get him). Sister would be too upset to miss out. Once the boy didn't come to his own soccer game because he wanted to attend the birthday party of his little sister's friend. We offered to bring him to the game. The dad said he would have brought the boy to the game. But His mom said "he chose the bday party."

This is not normal. I know twin families who aren't like that.

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

It's clear you don't always know how this works. When kids are dropped at the door then what? Nobody wants a scene at their party. Just know that doing this is an imposition to others and they don't always appreciate it.

Anonymous wrote:Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

Exactly!

Use your words, people. Just say NO if you want to say no. Don’t give the siblings goodie bags, just say NO! Don’t pay admission for siblings, tell the venue people which kids you’re paying for and that’s it! Don’t let parents drop off siblings, tell them you will NOT be responsible for them!

This isn’t a problem unless you let it be a problem! Stop letting people walk all over you and then complaining about it. JFC.

Anonymous wrote:I had a party for one of my DC at a venue where you're allotted a certain number of kids for a set price (I did 15). I wrote the invitations to the names of the invited children only, and still three families dropped off younger siblings.

Dropping off siblings is a whole different level of rude.

I had a party for one of my DC at a venue where you're allotted a certain number of kids for a set price (I did 15). I wrote the invitations to the names of the invited children only, and still three families dropped off younger siblings.