Simply accused? Yes, I know two.

Convicted? No, I do not know any.

Our good family friend was accused of DV by his now ex-wife. She claimed he intimidated her, hit her regularly, and held her at gunpoint (even though there were no guns in the home and he'd never even held a gun). None of the accusations were founded, and her story kept changing repeatedly. In the end, SHE received a citation for filing a false police report.

My former co-worker was accused by his now ex-girlfriend of punching her in the face while they were in a bar. He was arrested immediately. There were apparently no witnesses,, which is weird, but upon review of the security footage, it was 100% clear that he had done no such thing and that she had, in her drunken state, run into the wall, which is what caused her facial injury.

Anonymous wrote:Anyone else wondering if OP is the wife trying to get a sense of how her circle will react?

Thought the same.

Anonymous wrote:My BIL caught his wife cheating. He decided to go to counseling and forgave her.

He caught her a 2nd time in a parking lot banging some dude at work,

She is a very successful CPA, CFO.

He drove up knocked on the window then drove home.

She came home and he open hand slapped her across the face.

He was charged with DV.

Yes, I think he can he reformed but truthfully I don’t think he is a domestic abuser.

This is J1, J2, J3 guy based on the writing style and the extraneous mention of wife being a CPA, CFO. Wish he wouldn't troll serious threads.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unfathomable to me that this happened to a couple you know and your concern is... him. WTF. He was arrested for domestic violence!! How about his poor wife and children, ie the victims??

With so many people like you out there I'm sure his reputation will be fine in no time. Ugh.

Exactly. Women were bringing my abusive ex dinners after he showed back up after a three week drinking binge where no one knew where he was.

No one offered to help me write my resume when he took all of our money and I became the breadwinner after a decade long career gap- ironically. But dang did he get fed. It was like women knew he was hapless so helped him. I was apparently considered capable and left to fend for myself while I recovered from his abuse and the years of post separation abuse that followed.

I’m so sorry. I am shocked at some people’s behaviour. It’s like men that marry literally months after their wives pass away. What is wrong with these men and the women they subsequently marry

DP. It's the same mentality, in some women (not all, some), as those who correspond with criminals who are in prison and insist the criminals are just misunderstood and/or are reforming. A craving to rescue someone. Unfortunately they wear rose-colored glasses they cannot take off and don't see that the reformed, misunderstood men are highly likely to repeat the same types of offenses.

For those posting about men who beat wives and children and then got their criminal records or charges expunged -- WTF? How? In the case of the woman whose face was black and blue, how did the man get off that charge? I'm asking seriously. What a lawyer he must have had.

You do realize a husband will be arrested and booked for a mere push or grabbing a wife's wrists or anything along those lines if she calls the 911, right? "Black and blue" is very, very rare and on the extreme end of typical domestic violence calls.

“a mere push” is the prelude to black & blue.

Bullshit.

Not bullshit at all. A man who feels entitled to push his wife has no boundaries against physical violence, and escalation can happen. If you’re the man and you feel unjustly accused here, grow up. The moment you decide to use physical force against the wife is the moment that you begin to deserve everything the legal system has to throw at you.

You are off your rocker.

DP. No, she's not. You, clearly, have a conditioned view of DV and an apologist.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure I will get slammed, but I grew up in the 1970s and my parents spanked us, and I occasionally received slaps in the face for mouthing off. To my knowledge my parents never hit one another (they never really fought even), but I would not have viewed a slap as DV.

Slapping a child in the face is horrible parenting. Slapping your wife in the face was DV then and DV now.

+1 If it's assault to slap a stranger why wouldn't it be assault to slap your wife or child? Do you also believe a husband can't rape his wife?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unfathomable to me that this happened to a couple you know and your concern is... him. WTF. He was arrested for domestic violence!! How about his poor wife and children, ie the victims??

With so many people like you out there I'm sure his reputation will be fine in no time. Ugh.

Exactly. Women were bringing my abusive ex dinners after he showed back up after a three week drinking binge where no one knew where he was.

No one offered to help me write my resume when he took all of our money and I became the breadwinner after a decade long career gap- ironically. But dang did he get fed. It was like women knew he was hapless so helped him. I was apparently considered capable and left to fend for myself while I recovered from his abuse and the years of post separation abuse that followed.

I’m so sorry. I am shocked at some people’s behaviour. It’s like men that marry literally months after their wives pass away. What is wrong with these men and the women they subsequently marry

DP. It's the same mentality, in some women (not all, some), as those who correspond with criminals who are in prison and insist the criminals are just misunderstood and/or are reforming. A craving to rescue someone. Unfortunately they wear rose-colored glasses they cannot take off and don't see that the reformed, misunderstood men are highly likely to repeat the same types of offenses.

For those posting about men who beat wives and children and then got their criminal records or charges expunged -- WTF? How? In the case of the woman whose face was black and blue, how did the man get off that charge? I'm asking seriously. What a lawyer he must have had.

You do realize a husband will be arrested and booked for a mere push or grabbing a wife's wrists or anything along those lines if she calls the 911, right? "Black and blue" is very, very rare and on the extreme end of typical domestic violence calls.

“a mere push” is the prelude to black & blue.

Bullshit.

Not bullshit at all. A man who feels entitled to push his wife has no boundaries against physical violence, and escalation can happen. If you’re the man and you feel unjustly accused here, grow up. The moment you decide to use physical force against the wife is the moment that you begin to deserve everything the legal system has to throw at you.

You are off your rocker.

Anonymous wrote:My dad is very successful, you would never guess he has a violent streak. But he does.

The older I get and experience DV in my own life and learn about friend’s experiences, the more I realize many men truly are violent and believe it’s OK to use violence to get their way. i

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure I will get slammed, but I grew up in the 1970s and my parents spanked us, and I occasionally received slaps in the face for mouthing off. To my knowledge my parents never hit one another (they never really fought even), but I would not have viewed a slap as DV.

Slapping a child in the face is horrible parenting. Slapping your wife in the face was DV then and DV now.

My dad is very successful, you would never guess he has a violent streak. But he does.

I’m sure I will get slammed, but I grew up in the 1970s and my parents spanked us, and I occasionally received slaps in the face for mouthing off. To my knowledge my parents never hit one another (they never really fought even), but I would not have viewed a slap as DV.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unfathomable to me that this happened to a couple you know and your concern is... him. WTF. He was arrested for domestic violence!! How about his poor wife and children, ie the victims??

With so many people like you out there I'm sure his reputation will be fine in no time. Ugh.

Exactly. Women were bringing my abusive ex dinners after he showed back up after a three week drinking binge where no one knew where he was.

No one offered to help me write my resume when he took all of our money and I became the breadwinner after a decade long career gap- ironically. But dang did he get fed. It was like women knew he was hapless so helped him. I was apparently considered capable and left to fend for myself while I recovered from his abuse and the years of post separation abuse that followed.

I’m so sorry. I am shocked at some people’s behaviour. It’s like men that marry literally months after their wives pass away. What is wrong with these men and the women they subsequently marry

DP. It's the same mentality, in some women (not all, some), as those who correspond with criminals who are in prison and insist the criminals are just misunderstood and/or are reforming. A craving to rescue someone. Unfortunately they wear rose-colored glasses they cannot take off and don't see that the reformed, misunderstood men are highly likely to repeat the same types of offenses.

For those posting about men who beat wives and children and then got their criminal records or charges expunged -- WTF? How? In the case of the woman whose face was black and blue, how did the man get off that charge? I'm asking seriously. What a lawyer he must have had.

You do realize a husband will be arrested and booked for a mere push or grabbing a wife's wrists or anything along those lines if she calls the 911, right? "Black and blue" is very, very rare and on the extreme end of typical domestic violence calls.

“a mere push” is the prelude to black & blue.

Bullshit.

I didn't write the above but I got pushed by former spouse and ended up falling, and having bruises on my knee. It was a hard push with both hands. I think PP was trying to imply violence can escalate.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unfathomable to me that this happened to a couple you know and your concern is... him. WTF. He was arrested for domestic violence!! How about his poor wife and children, ie the victims??

With so many people like you out there I'm sure his reputation will be fine in no time. Ugh.

Exactly. Women were bringing my abusive ex dinners after he showed back up after a three week drinking binge where no one knew where he was.

No one offered to help me write my resume when he took all of our money and I became the breadwinner after a decade long career gap- ironically. But dang did he get fed. It was like women knew he was hapless so helped him. I was apparently considered capable and left to fend for myself while I recovered from his abuse and the years of post separation abuse that followed.

I’m so sorry. I am shocked at some people’s behaviour. It’s like men that marry literally months after their wives pass away. What is wrong with these men and the women they subsequently marry

DP. It's the same mentality, in some women (not all, some), as those who correspond with criminals who are in prison and insist the criminals are just misunderstood and/or are reforming. A craving to rescue someone. Unfortunately they wear rose-colored glasses they cannot take off and don't see that the reformed, misunderstood men are highly likely to repeat the same types of offenses.

For those posting about men who beat wives and children and then got their criminal records or charges expunged -- WTF? How? In the case of the woman whose face was black and blue, how did the man get off that charge? I'm asking seriously. What a lawyer he must have had.

You do realize a husband will be arrested and booked for a mere push or grabbing a wife's wrists or anything along those lines if she calls the 911, right? "Black and blue" is very, very rare and on the extreme end of typical domestic violence calls.

“a mere push” is the prelude to black & blue.

Bullshit.

Not bullshit at all. A man who feels entitled to push his wife has no boundaries against physical violence, and escalation can happen. If you’re the man and you feel unjustly accused here, grow up. The moment you decide to use physical force against the wife is the moment that you begin to deserve everything the legal system has to throw at you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's unfathomable to me that this happened to a couple you know and your concern is... him. WTF. He was arrested for domestic violence!! How about his poor wife and children, ie the victims??

With so many people like you out there I'm sure his reputation will be fine in no time. Ugh.

Exactly. Women were bringing my abusive ex dinners after he showed back up after a three week drinking binge where no one knew where he was.

No one offered to help me write my resume when he took all of our money and I became the breadwinner after a decade long career gap- ironically. But dang did he get fed. It was like women knew he was hapless so helped him. I was apparently considered capable and left to fend for myself while I recovered from his abuse and the years of post separation abuse that followed.

I’m so sorry. I am shocked at some people’s behaviour. It’s like men that marry literally months after their wives pass away. What is wrong with these men and the women they subsequently marry

DP. It's the same mentality, in some women (not all, some), as those who correspond with criminals who are in prison and insist the criminals are just misunderstood and/or are reforming. A craving to rescue someone. Unfortunately they wear rose-colored glasses they cannot take off and don't see that the reformed, misunderstood men are highly likely to repeat the same types of offenses.

For those posting about men who beat wives and children and then got their criminal records or charges expunged -- WTF? How? In the case of the woman whose face was black and blue, how did the man get off that charge? I'm asking seriously. What a lawyer he must have had.

You do realize a husband will be arrested and booked for a mere push or grabbing a wife's wrists or anything along those lines if she calls the 911, right? "Black and blue" is very, very rare and on the extreme end of typical domestic violence calls.

“a mere push” is the prelude to black & blue.

Bullshit.

Anonymous wrote:My BIL caught his wife cheating. He decided to go to counseling and forgave her.

He caught her a 2nd time in a parking lot banging some dude at work,

She is a very successful CPA, CFO.

He drove up knocked on the window then drove home.

She came home and he open hand slapped her across the face.

He was charged with DV.

Yes, I think he can he reformed but truthfully I don’t think he is a domestic abuser.

He should have just locked her out—told her not to come home. There needs to be a cooling off period because the anger over betrayal is really like none other. I made my spouse leave so my kids wouldn’t see or hear anything and honestly I wanted to beat the crap out of spouse.

Cheating/infidelity causes people to snap. People who have never been violent or angry can throw things and lash out. “Crime of passion”.

It’s a dangerous time—discovery of an affair and quite unpredictable.

Anonymous wrote:My BIL caught his wife cheating. He decided to go to counseling and forgave her.

He caught her a 2nd time in a parking lot banging some dude at work,

She is a very successful CPA, CFO.

He drove up knocked on the window then drove home.

She came home and he open hand slapped her across the face.

He was charged with DV.

Yes, I think he can he reformed but truthfully I don’t think he is a domestic abuser.

BIL??? So he slapped your sister? Your sister is the cheating Ho?