Anonymous
10/11/2023 13:56
Subject: Re:How often are you having sex lately?
Together 25+ years. I'm now menopausal but still have more drive than spouse. I miss it. We probably last had sex several months ago. There is some kissing and otherwise things are good. I try to be thankful for what I have.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 13:44
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
No, we’re still about the same weight and stay fit.
We've been married 20 years. My wife has gained 60+ pounds and is now 200+. I've gained 10 and am now 190.
My interest in having sex with her has declined. Used to be 3x per week, now 1x per week (with much less enthusiasm.)
Anonymous
10/11/2023 13:10
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
Yes. I’ve gained about 30lbs.
Unless you gained so much weight that you aren’t able to physically do certain things, I don’t really see how this matters.
I would say that going through difficult emotional or health crises and fighting/feeling like the other person doesn’t care matters a lot more.
Really? My DH's big stomach is a huge turnoff for me. I have to do it in the dark and not touch him there for it to happen.
I understand what you are saying, but I really don’t feel this at all.
I mean, if you are relaxed and happy and in love with your husband, and he loves you, and you both want to have sex, and his stomach isn’t limiting anything you do with him in any way, why would looking at his stomach make you want to limit your own pleasure and satisfaction in that moment?
On the other hand, if you are in pain, exhausted and stressed, and you are angry with your husband because he is calling you lazy and refusing to help you out. You don’t feel love, and you don’t feel loved. What could looking at a thinner stomach possibly do to make you interested in sex?
NP - thinnner stomachs don't necessarily turn me on. But beer guts turn me off. They are a representation of my husband's choices: to eat trash, to not exercise, to not care enough about his family enough to stay in shape. Also, it is squishy (men should not be squishy). Yes, his stomach does limit my pleasure - it does get in the way, and adds 20-40 pounds that if I'm on the bottom I'm (somewhat) supporting.
Well, I guess that I see it as my husband’s choices to work hard to support our family, to play basketball in the driveway with the kids after school instead of going to the gym, to eat meals with us as a family instead of having his own thing, and go out to parties and date nights together.
But if your husband is overweight because he is isolating from your family and eating trash by himself, and he has told you that he doesn’t love or care about you or your children, isn’t is possible that this is the actual turn off? I mean, I don’t see why you are having sex with this man at all.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 13:10
Subject: Re:How often are you having sex lately?
DW 50, DH 43. Once a day and often more than once if we have time. We had great chemistry from day one and have never looked back. Sex has always been a good, simple thing for us and a very important part of our relationship.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 12:42
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
Yes. I’ve gained about 30lbs.
Unless you gained so much weight that you aren’t able to physically do certain things, I don’t really see how this matters.
I would say that going through difficult emotional or health crises and fighting/feeling like the other person doesn’t care matters a lot more.
Really? My DH's big stomach is a huge turnoff for me. I have to do it in the dark and not touch him there for it to happen.
I understand what you are saying, but I really don’t feel this at all.
I mean, if you are relaxed and happy and in love with your husband, and he loves you, and you both want to have sex, and his stomach isn’t limiting anything you do with him in any way, why would looking at his stomach make you want to limit your own pleasure and satisfaction in that moment?
On the other hand, if you are in pain, exhausted and stressed, and you are angry with your husband because he is calling you lazy and refusing to help you out. You don’t feel love, and you don’t feel loved. What could looking at a thinner stomach possibly do to make you interested in sex?
NP - thinnner stomachs don't necessarily turn me on. But beer guts turn me off. They are a representation of my husband's choices: to eat trash, to not exercise, to not care enough about his family enough to stay in shape. Also, it is squishy (men should not be squishy). Yes, his stomach does limit my pleasure - it does get in the way, and adds 20-40 pounds that if I'm on the bottom I'm (somewhat) supporting.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 12:33
Subject: Re:How often are you having sex lately?
I was just looking at a man with a huge beer belly the other day and noticing how unhealthy and unattractive it is. I understand PP being turned off.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 12:06
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
Yes. I’ve gained about 30lbs.
Unless you gained so much weight that you aren’t able to physically do certain things, I don’t really see how this matters.
I would say that going through difficult emotional or health crises and fighting/feeling like the other person doesn’t care matters a lot more.
Really? My DH's big stomach is a huge turnoff for me. I have to do it in the dark and not touch him there for it to happen.
I understand what you are saying, but I really don’t feel this at all.
I mean, if you are relaxed and happy and in love with your husband, and he loves you, and you both want to have sex, and his stomach isn’t limiting anything you do with him in any way, why would looking at his stomach make you want to limit your own pleasure and satisfaction in that moment?
On the other hand, if you are in pain, exhausted and stressed, and you are angry with your husband because he is calling you lazy and refusing to help you out. You don’t feel love, and you don’t feel loved. What could looking at a thinner stomach possibly do to make you interested in sex?
Anonymous
10/11/2023 11:04
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
Yes. I’ve gained about 30lbs.
Unless you gained so much weight that you aren’t able to physically do certain things, I don’t really see how this matters.
I would say that going through difficult emotional or health crises and fighting/feeling like the other person doesn’t care matters a lot more.
Really? My DH's big stomach is a huge turnoff for me. I have to do it in the dark and not touch him there for it to happen.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 09:46
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
I have gained a lot more than 10lbs and DW weighs a lot less than when we married. He is still very attracted to me.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 09:41
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
He weighed 135 when we met and weighs 150 now....I weighed 110 and weigh 120 now. So yes
I’ve gained about 15lbs but my husband says he likes my love handles but I think he really likes my bigger boobs.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 09:28
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
He weighed 135 when we met and weighs 150 now....I weighed 110 and weigh 120 now. So yes
Anonymous
10/11/2023 09:28
Subject: Re:How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Once every couple of years. Last time was in 2021, I think, because we didn't have sex this year or last. Wife has no drive, or she is lying that it is painful for her. 48 and 49, 10 years, two elementary school brats.
Wow. You've accused your wife of lying about having pain and called your own kids brats.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 09:00
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
Yes on the more than 10lbs but that hasn’t stopped us. We are far from obese. We are not as athletic in bed as we once were but I think that’s more age related.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 08:55
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:For people who have been together over a decade and still do it 2x/week or more: have either of you gained more than 10lbs?
No, we’re still about the same weight and stay fit.
Anonymous
10/11/2023 08:33
Subject: How often are you having sex lately?
Anonymous wrote:Married 27 years. DW 52 DH 57. 1 adult child. I have sex 2-3x per week with my AP. She’s 54.
This site is mostly women, but here we have the correct answer which applies to all husbands with an uninterested wife.