Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

If I zoom out and re-write this from the brother with the dog perspective, I would say "board your dog". Find a nice place or a pet sitter and choose the PEOPLE in your life over your animal. Because the dog will be dead in 10 years, but the rifts from forcing the animal on your human relationships when they have made their stance clear will remain.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s a small pool house why does it have a bed in it set up for guests??
What are your allergy symptoms and do allergy meds help? Do you sleep in the pool house?

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! It does not matter. She does not want dogs at the house OR at the pool. Back off.

People with dogs are really crazy in this country.

We all put up with annoying stuff for family. My brother's son refuses to put on clothes at our house, and sits on everything buck naked. We encourage him to cover himself - esp when other people are there! - and he refuses, and my brother doesn't care. His kids embed food in every surface of the house, they touch everything, they move everything, they make a huge mess, they stick their snotty hands into every food container they find, they make a huge amount of noise, I'm always having to look out for things they are about to break - and you know what? You deal with it because it's family and you want to see them and make them feel welcome more than you want to maintain your usual sense of order.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s a small pool house why does it have a bed in it set up for guests??
What are your allergy symptoms and do allergy meds help? Do you sleep in the pool house?

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! It does not matter. She does not want dogs at the house OR at the pool. Back off.

People with dogs are really crazy in this country.

We all put up with annoying stuff for family. My brother's son refuses to put on clothes at our house, and sits on everything buck naked. We encourage him to cover himself - esp when other people are there! - and he refuses, and my brother doesn't care. His kids embed food in every surface of the house, they touch everything, they move everything, they make a huge mess, they stick their snotty hands into every food container they find, they make a huge amount of noise, I'm always having to look out for things they are about to break - and you know what? You deal with it because it's family and you want to see them and make them feel welcome more than you want to maintain your usual sense of order.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s a small pool house why does it have a bed in it set up for guests??
What are your allergy symptoms and do allergy meds help? Do you sleep in the pool house?

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! It does not matter. She does not want dogs at the house OR at the pool. Back off.

People with dogs are really crazy in this country.

Anonymous wrote:If it’s a small pool house why does it have a bed in it set up for guests??
What are your allergy symptoms and do allergy meds help? Do you sleep in the pool house?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

I have never in my entire adult life had a dog and I agree with you. OP can do whatever she wants but really, is this the thing to dig in your heels about?

Yes. They can board the dog or they can stay in a pet friendly hotel (as they have done in the past). The options are NOT host the dog or brother doesn't see elderly mother.

I wonder what you would be saying if it was your sibling instead of your husbands

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

If I zoom out and re-write this from the brother with the dog perspective, I would say "board your dog". Find a nice place or a pet sitter and choose the PEOPLE in your life over your animal. Because the dog will be dead in 10 years, but the rifts from forcing the animal on your human relationships when they have made their stance clear will remain.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

I have never in my entire adult life had a dog and I agree with you. OP can do whatever she wants but really, is this the thing to dig in your heels about?

Yes. They can board the dog or they can stay in a pet friendly hotel (as they have done in the past). The options are NOT host the dog or brother doesn't see elderly mother.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

I have never in my entire adult life had a dog and I agree with you. OP can do whatever she wants but really, is this the thing to dig in your heels about?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

Do dog owners ever offer rto pay to deep clean your home after they visit? Run laundry, anything? No.

Completely nonresponsive to PP’s post.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

Do dog owners ever offer rto pay to deep clean your home after they visit? Run laundry, anything? No.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think visiting elderly mother - you could accommodate your husband's brother and sister in law in a pool house. If it were not family I would feel differently or if the purpose of the visit was more oriented to the visitors

+1

How often are they visiting? If they come this once, does that mean they're coming every other week from now on - or is this a couple times a year? For your husband's brother. For gd's sake I can't imagine telling my own brother he can't stay with me, to go see our mom.

No one is telling him he can't come, he just needs to board the dog.

Come on. Be reasonable here. Think like an actual person, not like a DCUM robot. It's such an unfriendly thing to do - especially now that there's a pool house.

OP can do what she wants. She's certainly getting a lot of encouragement to stand her ground here. But I would just recommend taking a step back and thinking about whether this is the hill you want to die on with your husband's brother and his wife - coming to visit your husband's elderly mother in a nursing home. Just take a step back and think about the right way to treat this situation.