Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"13th grade/year" is an expression used by people who want to disparage state schools that are popular among students. They usually use that term because their kids didn't get in and they have a huge chip on their shoulder that they just can't shake. No matter that these schools are all large and there is next to zero chance of randomly running into someone from high school.

In other words, it's a form of face-saving. Disparaging the school(s) that didn't accept your kids. Very typical for DCUM.

Maybe this but it could also be a way to poke at those that seem to remain within the same bubble that they grew up in. All this talk about diversity but there is something to geographic diversity as well.

Posts keep commenting on friend groups when it really is not that at all. It is about experiencing different areas of the country beyond the immediate one grew up in and how those new experiences shape you as you grow.

That's all nice, but for the large majority of the college-going minority, spending an extra $30,000+ to go OOS versus in-state just to get "new experiences" is not affordable. Few people can afford to send their kids somewhere significantly more expensive "to broaden their horizons."

Cost is the number one determinant for most people when picking a college to attend. So, not surprisingly, there's a tendency for similarly-situation high school seniors to end up at similar schools.

Anyway, what stigma was the OP talking about? Who actually cares about this?

+1
Exactly. Plus, the student population/area of the country is not going to be markedly different at any college in the US. It's kind of amusing how certain posters make it seem like their kid is experiencing a different "culture" merely by going to a different state for school. Uh, no.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Arizona State, as did about half my high school, never saw any of them on campus. 😃

Was it in your hometown? No?

Then I think this is probably the norm

Yes it was. I went to high school in Scottsdale.

well, good - glad you had that experience.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Arizona State, as did about half my high school, never saw any of them on campus. 😃

Was it in your hometown? No?

Then I think this is probably the norm

Yes it was. I went to high school in Scottsdale.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"13th grade/year" is an expression used by people who want to disparage state schools that are popular among students. They usually use that term because their kids didn't get in and they have a huge chip on their shoulder that they just can't shake. No matter that these schools are all large and there is next to zero chance of randomly running into someone from high school.

In other words, it's a form of face-saving. Disparaging the school(s) that didn't accept your kids. Very typical for DCUM.

Maybe this but it could also be a way to poke at those that seem to remain within the same bubble that they grew up in. All this talk about diversity but there is something to geographic diversity as well.

Posts keep commenting on friend groups when it really is not that at all. It is about experiencing different areas of the country beyond the immediate one grew up in and how those new experiences shape you as you grow.

That's all nice, but for the large majority of the college-going minority, spending an extra $30,000+ to go OOS versus in-state just to get "new experiences" is not affordable. Few people can afford to send their kids somewhere significantly more expensive "to broaden their horizons."

Cost is the number one determinant for most people when picking a college to attend. So, not surprisingly, there's a tendency for similarly-situation high school seniors to end up at similar schools.

Anyway, what stigma was the OP talking about? Who actually cares about this?

Staying nearby because of financial constraints? Of course.

Staying nearby because your codependent mother forced you? Probably not healthy.

Sure. But there's a whole host of school options between going to a school on the opposite coast, and attending school as a commuter student because your mom won't let you go anywhere. 2-4 hours away gives your kid plenty of space.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"13th grade/year" is an expression used by people who want to disparage state schools that are popular among students. They usually use that term because their kids didn't get in and they have a huge chip on their shoulder that they just can't shake. No matter that these schools are all large and there is next to zero chance of randomly running into someone from high school.

In other words, it's a form of face-saving. Disparaging the school(s) that didn't accept your kids. Very typical for DCUM.

Maybe this but it could also be a way to poke at those that seem to remain within the same bubble that they grew up in. All this talk about diversity but there is something to geographic diversity as well.

Posts keep commenting on friend groups when it really is not that at all. It is about experiencing different areas of the country beyond the immediate one grew up in and how those new experiences shape you as you grow.

That's all nice, but for the large majority of the college-going minority, spending an extra $30,000+ to go OOS versus in-state just to get "new experiences" is not affordable. Few people can afford to send their kids somewhere significantly more expensive "to broaden their horizons."

Cost is the number one determinant for most people when picking a college to attend. So, not surprisingly, there's a tendency for similarly-situation high school seniors to end up at similar schools.

Anyway, what stigma was the OP talking about? Who actually cares about this?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids often go to school OOS when they can’t wait to get away from family.

Bingo.

I agree, but I've also heard of parents sending their kids OOS because they can't wait for them to leave the house.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"13th grade/year" is an expression used by people who want to disparage state schools that are popular among students. They usually use that term because their kids didn't get in and they have a huge chip on their shoulder that they just can't shake. No matter that these schools are all large and there is next to zero chance of randomly running into someone from high school.

In other words, it's a form of face-saving. Disparaging the school(s) that didn't accept your kids. Very typical for DCUM.

Maybe this but it could also be a way to poke at those that seem to remain within the same bubble that they grew up in. All this talk about diversity but there is something to geographic diversity as well.

Posts keep commenting on friend groups when it really is not that at all. It is about experiencing different areas of the country beyond the immediate one grew up in and how those new experiences shape you as you grow.

Exactly. It’s a great opportunity to expand your mind.

Aside from financial constraints, I don’t know why parents would force their kids to stay within a certain distance from home.

Anonymous wrote:I went to Arizona State, as did about half my high school, never saw any of them on campus. 😃

Was it in your hometown? No?

Then I think this is probably the norm

I went to Arizona State, as did about half my high school, never saw any of them on campus. 😃

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"13th grade/year" is an expression used by people who want to disparage state schools that are popular among students. They usually use that term because their kids didn't get in and they have a huge chip on their shoulder that they just can't shake. No matter that these schools are all large and there is next to zero chance of randomly running into someone from high school.

In other words, it's a form of face-saving. Disparaging the school(s) that didn't accept your kids. Very typical for DCUM.

Maybe this but it could also be a way to poke at those that seem to remain within the same bubble that they grew up in. All this talk about diversity but there is something to geographic diversity as well.

Posts keep commenting on friend groups when it really is not that at all. It is about experiencing different areas of the country beyond the immediate one grew up in and how those new experiences shape you as you grow.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids often go to school OOS when they can’t wait to get away from family.

No, it's because they have a fully funded 529 or trusts from the rich grandparents and your jealous broke small-minded behind can't afford to send your kid anywhere but a local state school.

Bingo for us. Thanks Grandpa!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids often go to school OOS when they can’t wait to get away from family.

yea, I know of a few kids who are looking to go as far away as possible to get away from their parents.

The kids I know who are close to their family want to be at least within 3 hours.

Also, coming home for the holidays will be a major PITA for those kids who go really far away. Could be why they go that far, though, so they have an excuse to not come home for the holidays.

My college roommate and I were very close with our families.

I wound up 8 hour drive from home and she was a 4 hour flight.

Granted, she was quite well off and I was more middle to upper middle class.

I just wound up there. My mom had wanted me to go away to college because she was not allowed to in the 60s.

I enjoyed being able to have a little freedom during those years. I grew as a person while remaining tight with my family.

And this was before cell phones and zoom and all that tech that connects us even more

Why couldn't you have that freedom going to a college three hours away? If your parents wanted you to have some freedom, you could have that living an hour away just as easily as 8 hours away. It just depends on how much *you* were wiling to use how close your parents are as a crutch.

My kid is going to instate close by, but they are on their own. We have zero expectations of them coming home on the weekends or us visiting them often.

I of course could have gone to a school closer. It just happened that the best school for me was the one that was 8 hours away. I also had options 1, 2, 3 and 4 hours from home. The actual distance wasn’t the point of my post, anyway. Just that you can be close to your family and go farther than 3 hours away, which the poster above (could be you, don’t know) seemed to use as some yardstick of a kid’s love for their family.

The only school I didn’t have any intention of going to and my parents didn’t want me to go either was the state university 15 minutes from home. There was nothing wrong with the school - it just really wouldn’t have felt like “going away” to me or them. Many of my friends who went there lived at home. 1/3 of my high school class went there. Just too easy to NOT branch out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids often go to school OOS when they can’t wait to get away from family.

No, it's because they have a fully funded 529 or trusts from the rich grandparents and your jealous broke small-minded behind can't afford to send your kid anywhere but a local state school.

I think I touched a nerve!

+1
The PP is triggered - no doubt because his spawn couldn’t get into their preferred state school - and I am here for it! Enjoy overpaying for your kid’s college experience, PP!