Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:38     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:No need for an excuse note, just tell them outright that she won't be taking the swim test.


Wouldn’t a better approach be to tell them that she would take a swim test and opt out of the swim class???
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:36     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Im surprised by these answers! OP I would have done what you did. It’s not like she’s asking for excuses to get out of things all the time and not is swimming in front of a group of your colleagues and classmates a necessary life skill.


No, but grit and resilience sure are.


What do grit and resilience do with not getting into a pool? At my Child's school if kids wanted to opt out of the swim unit they would run laps or do cardio which takes plenty of grit and resilience. This is ridiculous and I'm doubting whether you should be a parent yourself if you are.


You've missed the point. It's not which exercise they're doing. It's the fact that op's daughter feels uncomfortable. And instead of figuring out ways to help her survive this weeks long unit with tools to help her (rash guard, swim cap), instead op's mom is letting her not do the required unit and getting a DOCTOR to lie about it (yes I know that the doc didn't write something specific, but it's still a doctors note, so it implies a medical issue). Maybe those of us who had to do uncomfortable things and move on learned from it, maybe we are stronger for it. Parents these days are taking all obstacles from their children in a misguided attempt to keep them happy and mentally healthy. If the op's kid were getting bullied over a swimsuit it would be one thing. But her reasons are not enough to pull her, imo.

When this kid can't handle college and real life with any sort of resilience, this is the type of thing that op will forget had anything to do with it. Isn't there a post here about a 30 year old man who is MAD at his parents for giving him too much and now his credit score isn't great? So people are suggesting to help him even more. Let's get serious here...we are creating a generation of entitled kids if we do things like this.


lol

Don't want to get in a bathing suit in front of your middle school peers? Enjoy failing at life, loser!


Seriously? Is this really the only way in which she'll be able to overcome obstacles and learn resilience?


Not PP but - of course it’s not the only way, but it’s one of them. If she gets the message she can just opt out of a graduation requirement because she doesn’t feel like it, then what’s next? In real life, you can’t always just say you don’t feel like doing things. Sometimes you just have to suck it up.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:22     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Im surprised by these answers! OP I would have done what you did. It’s not like she’s asking for excuses to get out of things all the time and not is swimming in front of a group of your colleagues and classmates a necessary life skill.


No, but grit and resilience sure are.


What do grit and resilience do with not getting into a pool? At my Child's school if kids wanted to opt out of the swim unit they would run laps or do cardio which takes plenty of grit and resilience. This is ridiculous and I'm doubting whether you should be a parent yourself if you are.


You've missed the point. It's not which exercise they're doing. It's the fact that op's daughter feels uncomfortable. And instead of figuring out ways to help her survive this weeks long unit with tools to help her (rash guard, swim cap), instead op's mom is letting her not do the required unit and getting a DOCTOR to lie about it (yes I know that the doc didn't write something specific, but it's still a doctors note, so it implies a medical issue). Maybe those of us who had to do uncomfortable things and move on learned from it, maybe we are stronger for it. Parents these days are taking all obstacles from their children in a misguided attempt to keep them happy and mentally healthy. If the op's kid were getting bullied over a swimsuit it would be one thing. But her reasons are not enough to pull her, imo.

When this kid can't handle college and real life with any sort of resilience, this is the type of thing that op will forget had anything to do with it. Isn't there a post here about a 30 year old man who is MAD at his parents for giving him too much and now his credit score isn't great? So people are suggesting to help him even more. Let's get serious here...we are creating a generation of entitled kids if we do things like this.


lol

Don't want to get in a bathing suit in front of your middle school peers? Enjoy failing at life, loser!


Seriously? Is this really the only way in which she'll be able to overcome obstacles and learn resilience?
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:20     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

We used to have to take showers in MS and I refused. My gym teacher let me know it was part of my grade. My mom told me I didn't have to and wrote a note to the teacher indicating that I wouldn't be taking showers and to not force me.

All three of us were on the same page that the decision had consequences but that my parent was willing to accept them. She never would have dreamed of trying to finagle a note from a doctor to try and avoid accountability for the choice.

It just amazes me the lengths people will go to when trying to avoid accepting the consequences of their actions.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:20     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I'm a mean mom I guess. I'd tell her to get her sorry a$$ in the pool and learn to deal with not looking perfect all the time.
Some of you just want to protect your kids from being uncomfortable. As a teacher, I see you and think you're not doing your kid any favors.


Yep, I guess you are.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 08:02     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Im surprised by these answers! OP I would have done what you did. It’s not like she’s asking for excuses to get out of things all the time and not is swimming in front of a group of your colleagues and classmates a necessary life skill.


No, but grit and resilience sure are.


What do grit and resilience do with not getting into a pool? At my Child's school if kids wanted to opt out of the swim unit they would run laps or do cardio which takes plenty of grit and resilience. This is ridiculous and I'm doubting whether you should be a parent yourself if you are.


You've missed the point. It's not which exercise they're doing. It's the fact that op's daughter feels uncomfortable. And instead of figuring out ways to help her survive this weeks long unit with tools to help her (rash guard, swim cap), instead op's mom is letting her not do the required unit and getting a DOCTOR to lie about it (yes I know that the doc didn't write something specific, but it's still a doctors note, so it implies a medical issue). Maybe those of us who had to do uncomfortable things and move on learned from it, maybe we are stronger for it. Parents these days are taking all obstacles from their children in a misguided attempt to keep them happy and mentally healthy. If the op's kid were getting bullied over a swimsuit it would be one thing. But her reasons are not enough to pull her, imo.

When this kid can't handle college and real life with any sort of resilience, this is the type of thing that op will forget had anything to do with it. Isn't there a post here about a 30 year old man who is MAD at his parents for giving him too much and now his credit score isn't great? So people are suggesting to help him even more. Let's get serious here...we are creating a generation of entitled kids if we do things like this.


EXACTLY!!
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 07:39     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Im surprised by these answers! OP I would have done what you did. It’s not like she’s asking for excuses to get out of things all the time and not is swimming in front of a group of your colleagues and classmates a necessary life skill.


No, but grit and resilience sure are.


What do grit and resilience do with not getting into a pool? At my Child's school if kids wanted to opt out of the swim unit they would run laps or do cardio which takes plenty of grit and resilience. This is ridiculous and I'm doubting whether you should be a parent yourself if you are.


You've missed the point. It's not which exercise they're doing. It's the fact that op's daughter feels uncomfortable. And instead of figuring out ways to help her survive this weeks long unit with tools to help her (rash guard, swim cap), instead op's mom is letting her not do the required unit and getting a DOCTOR to lie about it (yes I know that the doc didn't write something specific, but it's still a doctors note, so it implies a medical issue). Maybe those of us who had to do uncomfortable things and move on learned from it, maybe we are stronger for it. Parents these days are taking all obstacles from their children in a misguided attempt to keep them happy and mentally healthy. If the op's kid were getting bullied over a swimsuit it would be one thing. But her reasons are not enough to pull her, imo.

When this kid can't handle college and real life with any sort of resilience, this is the type of thing that op will forget had anything to do with it. Isn't there a post here about a 30 year old man who is MAD at his parents for giving him too much and now his credit score isn't great? So people are suggesting to help him even more. Let's get serious here...we are creating a generation of entitled kids if we do things like this.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 07:13     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

I think it makes sense in this situation, OP. I was on swim team and took a swimming elective at school in HS but I chose to do those things.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 06:58     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

My high school in the early 90’s had swim class, and we had to use the school-provided swimsuits, which were color-coded by size. Seems kind of crazy when I think back on it!
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 06:55     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

I see no reason for a kid to be in a swimsuit in school.

I'm typically a "sorry but you gotta do it, kid" parent, but I'd have zero issue with getting a doctor's note to excuse her from this if she's uncomfortable.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 06:44     Subject: Re:Swim Excuse Note

OMG. I'm a mean mom I guess. I'd tell her to get her sorry a$$ in the pool and learn to deal with not looking perfect all the time.
Some of you just want to protect your kids from being uncomfortable. As a teacher, I see you and think you're not doing your kid any favors.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 04:23     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Get her women’s swim shorts and a rash guard if she is uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

I had to swim in PE in the late 80s. I was overweight and had the big 80s Aquanet hair. Swimming in school was pure hell for teen girls back then. But we did it because no parent would get us a doctors note.

I went in with a big tee over my suit and had my hair in a scrunchie. I didn’t get it wet for any reason. Swimming in PE wasn’t real swimming with hour head going under. I doubt it is now either.


OP here. Actually it's diving unit so hair will get wet. I have the decency to get my child a doctors note. Wearing a big tee and a scrunch would look even more ridiculous than just a swim suit.


Diving? Seriously, WTF? Not a necessary life skill whatsoever. The teacher can give her an alternate form of exercise to do. Good job, OP.

(and no, I’m not OP. Ask Jeff - or, you know, get a life)
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 04:21     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Nope. She’s facing the exact same insecurities and issues that many other girls of her age face. Get her a swim cap and her hair will be fine.


"I suffered! Others suffer! Therefore you will suffer!"

And for what?


Exactly. And all these angry PPs demanding OP’s kid be forced to swim in school because THEY were also walked to school, in the deep snow, uphill both ways.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 04:19     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Good for you, OP, for listening to your daughter. I say YAY to you! There's no reason for her to have to go through swim class just because those of us in the older generation had to tolerate it.


Okay but who SHOULD do the swim classes? Only girls who want to? And who should do math? What if my kid doesn't feel like doing calculus. It's not required for success in life, but it's part of the curriculum.
If you feel like swim shouldn't be part of the curriculum to make girls suffer; then join the pta, attend board meetings, make a difference. But getting an unnecessary doctors note is just coddling.


No one.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2023 04:18     Subject: Swim Excuse Note

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You're sending her these messages:

Your backne is embarrassing.

Your insecurities are more important than other's' insecurities.

When life is unpleasant, you should avoid it.


Exactly.

OP, this sends a terrible message to your kid.


Oh yes, like the message that:

“It is your body and no one has a right to compel you to display it, particularly under circumstances where the display is likely to result in malicious, targeted, anti-woman bullying.”

Yup, terrible message.


WTF are you talking about? She can wear a wetsuit that covers up everything and more.


A wetsuit is tight fitting. Do you know what you are talking about?


A wetsuit covers basically everything. No swimwear is anything but tight. Doesn’t mean the kid should be able to just not go to swim class. That’s ridiculous.


HAVING “swim class” in public school is ridiculous.