Anonymous wrote:DS1 is attending a classmate's 6th birthday at a play place this weekend. Theres no "siblings welcome" note on the invitation, so assume they arent included....totally fine. Because of timing and logistics, I need to bring DS2 (2.5 yo) and will pay for his entry fee and snacks separately. Do I let the host parent know or just show up and do our own thing?

Yes, I know this is a small issue and I don't care about the cost but am curious what the etiquette is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

My venue is public but the party room is for 24 kids. My child has 22 kids in her class and I have 3 children. Party venue does not allow outside food or drinks. That is why I have a space problem. I invited everyone because I didn’t want to leave 5-6 kids out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You all are ridiculous. Are you really telling someone she shouldn’t bring her 2.5 year old to a PUBLIC PLACE?

OP - if your six year does not require you to be in their sight at all times, take and pay for your toddler, and do not give this a second thought. Do not take your younger child into the party room.

Because what will happen is the host will see mom and 2.5 year old and not want to be rude and will reluctantly invite them to join in. Or maybe enthusiastically, it all depends. Are you saying you would ignore a birthday party guests mom and sibling if you knew full well they were there? The invited kid will probably be interacting with his mom at some point and a host overseeing the kids will likely notice. It sets up a potentially awkward situation. Even in a public place.

Join in what? Pizza and cake? OP can just say “no thank you”. And no, I would not ignore OP, but I also do not order pizza and cake to the slice.

I think the venue matters - hand wringing over a venue that will have hundreds of kids running throughout is ridiculous. If this were a small private party at a bakery to decorate cakes or something my answer would be different.

Well, just like the party favor hater can say "no thank you" neither she nor her kids do. We all know that someone would jump at the offer if it were made. And it's not just one family but multiple families might do this. Which is why people can't make it a free for all "siblings welcome!"

Again, it’s a place with 100s of kids running around. Who cares if people pay for and entertain their own kids in a public place? You all are ridiculous and controlling telling people not to being their other kids somewhere like this.

It’s clear you have little experience with kid parties and how this actually plays out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm probably the outlier on this - I have an only child, but if someone didn't expect a sibling to eat food that I provided, be paid for by me at a venue, or get a loot bag, I would not feel the need for them to tell me anything about the sibling. They can pay for them, feed them, and entertain them themselves without notice to me.

100% this. Why are you ladies freaking out? There will probably be 100 other kids there.

ITA. No one is going to tell me I can't bring my kid to a public venue that I pay for myself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

NP. I never bring uninvited siblings and YES, it's irritable when people do without asking, I get it. If it's a space issue you need to be upfront on the invitation- "unfortunately we cannot accommodate siblings." I don't get the handwringing over food and goody bags though. If you have siblings show up that weren't accounted for in the RSVP, just don't hand them a goody bag. If they ask say sorry, we only have enough for the number of kids on the RSVP. And frankly what I'd put in bags for a 6yo may not be appropriate for a toddler anyway. But I always seem to have extra cupcakes and pizza after these things because I typically account for parents when I order and then half of them don't eat anything. So I'd be happy to have someone take more food so I don't have to bring home.

People don’t care about no siblings on an invite. Otherwise we wouldn’t have tons of posts on this common phenomenon. I find disingenuous the people acting like this never happens or that parents don’t take advantage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

NP. I never bring uninvited siblings and YES, it's irritable when people do without asking, I get it. If it's a space issue you need to be upfront on the invitation- "unfortunately we cannot accommodate siblings." I don't get the handwringing over food and goody bags though. If you have siblings show up that weren't accounted for in the RSVP, just don't hand them a goody bag. If they ask say sorry, we only have enough for the number of kids on the RSVP. And frankly what I'd put in bags for a 6yo may not be appropriate for a toddler anyway. But I always seem to have extra cupcakes and pizza after these things because I typically account for parents when I order and then half of them don't eat anything. So I'd be happy to have someone take more food so I don't have to bring home.

People don’t care about no siblings on an invite. Otherwise we wouldn’t have tons of posts on this common phenomenon. I find disingenuous the people acting like this never happens or that parents don’t take advantage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

NP. I never bring uninvited siblings and YES, it's irritable when people do without asking, I get it. If it's a space issue you need to be upfront on the invitation- "unfortunately we cannot accommodate siblings." I don't get the handwringing over food and goody bags though. If you have siblings show up that weren't accounted for in the RSVP, just don't hand them a goody bag. If they ask say sorry, we only have enough for the number of kids on the RSVP. And frankly what I'd put in bags for a 6yo may not be appropriate for a toddler anyway. But I always seem to have extra cupcakes and pizza after these things because I typically account for parents when I order and then half of them don't eat anything. So I'd be happy to have someone take more food so I don't have to bring home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

My venue is public but the party room is for 24 kids. My child has 22 kids in her class and I have 3 children. Party venue does not allow outside food or drinks. That is why I have a space problem. I invited everyone because I didn’t want to leave 5-6 kids out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

Mom cant watch her kid in the party room if she drops off. Why would having the sibling in the open play mean that she needs to be in the party room? How is it any different?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

Because it isnt an appropriate drop off venue.....
I just went to a birthday party at this type of place and there were 3 siblings present. None of them got food or a goody bag. Cake was offered as it was to parents and other adults. The siblings were paid for by the parents for open play.

This is not hard. Just communicate your expectations ahead of time. No siblings to me means we arent paying for siblings to attend. No siblings does not mean you either drop off or come alone- unless it is communicated explicitly. And to blow your mind further, do you only expect 1 parent to show up? Would you be taken aback if BOTH parents showed up?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.

Because they don't stay away from the party. The play part is about 75 minutes then they are in the private party space for the last 45. Who comes wandering in looking for food and favors? The uninvited siblings. Because mom is there to watch her kid and she can't do it when she's not in the party room. I swear some of you have never been to a kid party if you've never seen this. I've never seen the parent insist on staying and then pretending to be in the public area out of sight the entire time. Why stay at all then? The whole reason OP said she needs to stay is because she doesn't want to just drop off.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 kids. For my 2 older kids, we had small parties and not one person brought a sibling. Some dropped off. Many stayed.

I’m having an all class party for my kindergarten child at a public place. I would rather you not come than bring a sibling. I have a space problem as is. Unless you are a close friend, I don’t want your toddler.

If you’re in a public place, what are you going to do with all the randos who also happen to be in your public space that day? I don’t understand what sort of space issue you are concerned about in a public venue (unless you paid to rent the whole place in which case it’s no longer open to the public). Presumably you are paying for X number of kids and have a party room for pizza/cake for X number of kids. If Y kids show up and don’t eat your food or otherwise require you to pay for them or count toward your package total, then you don’t need to worry about those Y number of kids whether they are a sibling or not.

I’ve never brought an uninvited sibling to a party before (aside from a non mobile infant in carrier back in the day). But I don’t see why anyone would care if a sibling happens to be in the same venue, but kept separate from the party. Please explain why you give a crap if a toddler runs around a public play place that happens to be related to one of your party guests?

I swear some of you just make up stuff to get upset about.