Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
This thread and all the others on here. Financial predators.
Then don’t. Don’t have kids, don’t get married, go play XBox. No one needs you.
Interesting how some grown women think that they should be taken care of financially. Be a feminist and get a job.
This is because you don't see work outside of the house as work. It's actual work. More work most of the time. It never ends. And yes stay at home parents have more time to shop and cook for you, take care of your kids (a nanny alone charges $15 an hour per kid around here), and pets, clean your room and do your laundry. Handle finances and pay taxes, and handle appointments and vacation planning. Buy gifts. Coordinate friend get-togethers. This is also why men want another women right after. They know they don't want to handle this work. But it's actual work. There are actually ways you can outsource this stuff and you can see how it all adds up financially.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
This thread and all the others on here. Financial predators.
Then don’t. Don’t have kids, don’t get married, go play XBox. No one needs you.
Interesting how some grown women think that they should be taken care of financially. Be a feminist and get a job.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
This thread and all the others on here. Financial predators.
Then don’t. Don’t have kids, don’t get married, go play XBox. No one needs you.
Interesting how some grown women think that they should be taken care of financially. Be a feminist and get a job.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Men are all too happy to have a SAHM during the hard years, letting their wives do the overnights and chasing tantruming toddlers while he hangs around the office “working late.” But then the revisionist history comes out, oh actually I was fine with sharing the burden but she INSISTED… whatever you say bud. The data and my lived experience shows that men who have SAHWs see their careers take off. The idea is to not divorce and enjoy the fruit of the mutually beneficial arrangement together. There is risk on both side if that doesn’t work out, but don’t pretend you weren’t getting something out of it too. After a long career in biglaw I see right through that.
Exactly: that's what mine did with me: we started when he was at $150K /year and I was at $85K/year. I went SAHM as he needed to travel and develop business. Just before he acquired major stock options package he decides that now it's time to divorce, after 15 years of marriage. Divorces. Starts making $1mm/year and now tells me I didn't earn any of it and it's none of my business
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
This is what I think VA and MD should do at a minimum. It really is unfair that the child is now at college and can't pay for their own living expenses and one parent has to foot that bill entirely even just for food and other basics.
Living expenses are way above $7k/year. My ex is spending high on his girlfriend (Caribbean vacations, jewelry etc_) and on his house (a custom gym, added pool etc). But he told son to go take loans or work flipping burgers.
That same father told son a few years ago to drop a sport because he didn't want to drive him to practices on 50/50 custody schedule. My son is 6'3 and very athletic, he could have had his room &board completely free as a college athlete.
My exH is bitter I got 50% assets and am relatively ok. He wants ME to pay for the son's college living expenses, out of a spite
I don't really mind a child having to pay for a degree or college, but it just seems unfair that they also have to pay for their room and board if instead they could be working but are doing this so they will be more self sufficient in the future. And often that becomes a parent's job to finance. I just think if we are basically requiring kids to go to school longer for most jobs in the US that their clothing and food and basics should be covered just like medical and insurance also covers through this time. DC obviously agrees.
When I was in college I worked to pay room & board. My rent (circa 2005) was $225/mo for my share in a weird 1BR apartment where we turned a dining room into a sleeping nook. I paid for it working $10/hr part time. Today in my college town a 1BR runs more like $1500 and all the weird crappy buildings were long ago torn down and replaced with more expensive housing. And good luck finding anyone willing to do a weird housing share with you.
Childcare expenses in Virgina are max. $1000 per child per month. They probably max out before this amount. It doesn't even cover food and clothing and toiletries.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
This thread and all the others on here. Financial predators.
Then don’t. Don’t have kids, don’t get married, go play XBox. No one needs you.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
This thread and all the others on here. Financial predators.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
You don't need to go to college. Everyone does not go to college. No child is entitled to go to college, not even the children of DCUM parents.
Anonymous wrote:Yikes at this thread. Never get married fellas!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
This is what I think VA and MD should do at a minimum. It really is unfair that the child is now at college and can't pay for their own living expenses and one parent has to foot that bill entirely even just for food and other basics.
Living expenses are way above $7k/year. My ex is spending high on his girlfriend (Caribbean vacations, jewelry etc_) and on his house (a custom gym, added pool etc). But he told son to go take loans or work flipping burgers.
That same father told son a few years ago to drop a sport because he didn't want to drive him to practices on 50/50 custody schedule. My son is 6'3 and very athletic, he could have had his room &board completely free as a college athlete.
My exH is bitter I got 50% assets and am relatively ok. He wants ME to pay for the son's college living expenses, out of a spite
I don't really mind a child having to pay for a degree or college, but it just seems unfair that they also have to pay for their room and board if instead they could be working but are doing this so they will be more self sufficient in the future. And often that becomes a parent's job to finance. I just think if we are basically requiring kids to go to school longer for most jobs in the US that their clothing and food and basics should be covered just like medical and insurance also covers through this time. DC obviously agrees.
When I was in college I worked to pay room & board. My rent (circa 2005) was $225/mo for my share in a weird 1BR apartment where we turned a dining room into a sleeping nook. I paid for it working $10/hr part time. Today in my college town a 1BR runs more like $1500 and all the weird crappy buildings were long ago torn down and replaced with more expensive housing. And good luck finding anyone willing to do a weird housing share with you.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
You don't need to go to college. Everyone does not go to college. No child is entitled to go to college, not even the children of DCUM parents.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
This is what I think VA and MD should do at a minimum. It really is unfair that the child is now at college and can't pay for their own living expenses and one parent has to foot that bill entirely even just for food and other basics.
Living expenses are way above $7k/year. My ex is spending high on his girlfriend (Caribbean vacations, jewelry etc_) and on his house (a custom gym, added pool etc). But he told son to go take loans or work flipping burgers.
That same father told son a few years ago to drop a sport because he didn't want to drive him to practices on 50/50 custody schedule. My son is 6'3 and very athletic, he could have had his room &board completely free as a college athlete.
My exH is bitter I got 50% assets and am relatively ok. He wants ME to pay for the son's college living expenses, out of a spite
I don't really mind a child having to pay for a degree or college, but it just seems unfair that they also have to pay for their room and board if instead they could be working but are doing this so they will be more self sufficient in the future. And often that becomes a parent's job to finance. I just think if we are basically requiring kids to go to school longer for most jobs in the US that their clothing and food and basics should be covered just like medical and insurance also covers through this time. DC obviously agrees.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It depends. I got alimony for life. I was married for 24 years. I was a SAHM. My ex is a doctor with a high salary.
Which state and percentage of his salary were you awarded, age at the time of divorce?
Age, 48. I get $120,00 a year tax free for the first 8 years. My alimony goes down every year till I reach the age of 65. After that I get $36,000 a year tax free.
He makes $650,000 a year.
My a..hole exH was "fired" just as I filed for divorce. Then went back to the same company as a "consultant", right after signing the settlement agreement.
How do you plan for your retirement? It's a nice alimony but without assets or savings after 65 y.o. it will be tight..
You need to work. There’s no reason an able bodied 48 year old can’t get a job.
I work and happy without his alimony. But I was just lucky to secure a job after 10 years SAHM. This doesn't change the fact that he's a a-hole. Who "fires" himself and gets severance at 54, just so he didn't have to pay alimony and higher CS? He basically ripped off his own child.
His income 1st year after divorce was settled is $2mm/year. I am taking him back to court for a different child support in the fall. If I make 150K and he makes $2mm, there is something wrong with him paying only $1300/month in CS!
Most judges would not have called him out on the timing of his "firing." Also, most lawyers would have hired a professional to determine his earning potential. I'd go back to court on this one.
Meant: Most judges would have called him out
My salary is higher than what his alimony would have been, and I am building my resume. Going to court back than trying to call him out meant missing another 2 years of my life, work history and health, in addition to $200K in legal fees. He also could had forced sale of marital assets causing me even higher financial harm vs me just loosing his alimony. So I settled and got marital assets I wanted intact.
I know that alimony cannot be changed after I signed MSA, but I am taking him back to court for the child support. He's incredibly cheap with our son, and refuses to pay his college expenses.
What state did you divorce in?
DC
Oh I thought DC covers college? Or is it just that CS continues through 21?
No DC doesn't cover college, only CS through 21. But as everyone goes to college and CS is based on the child's needs, the college becomes a need. That's what I am going to argue when I take my ex back to court this fall. Son is finishing HS next year
You don't need to go to college. Everyone does not go to college. No child is entitled to go to college, not even the children of DCUM parents.