Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can't the dog be around your family?

You know what the options are: Either find a way to make this work - by letting the dog stay, by paying her enough for her to get her own place, by having the dog go to doggy daycare during the day, etc - or your nanny is going to have to choose between working for you and her dog. She will have to find herself a new job and apartment, or find the dog a new home, or bring the dog to the shelter.

I would choose my dog over a job.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP it seems like the problem is you told the nanny they'd have to find a solution to the dog- but maybe in a wishy washy way?- and now, from what you have said yourself, the nanny is doing no work regarding how to either get the dog trained better, sent to a daycare during her working hours (I mean this is the bare minimum solution here) or rehomed. You've stated you yourself have done all the work and she hasn't really done anything. You need to sit her down and have a come to Jesus, and tell her she has X amount of days/weeks to find somewhere else for the dog to live- and remind her that you never agreed to have the dog live in your home, and outline the different ways it is negatively affecting your husband's work and how it dislikes your children and remind her of the time the smoke alarm went off and she ignored it because she was tending to her dog. And tell her that at the end of X days/weeks, the dog WILL be gone from your home, and if that means the nanny is gone with the dog, so be it, but the dog has an end date and you are sticking to it. You need to be firm because it sounds like she is young and taking advantage of the fact that you are a pushover.

Just stop. We are talking about a young college student with no family to fall back on who is working her a$$ her dealing with OP's three kids WITH the stressed out husband IN the house. She's not "taking advantage" of anyone -- she's overwhelmed and you are all heartless.

The nanny is an employee. My employer does not deal with my personal issues for me or act like a surrogate parent. The nanny is an adult and an irresponsible one at that.

You don't live with your employer.

Anonymous wrote:Why can't the dog be around your family?

You know what the options are: Either find a way to make this work - by letting the dog stay, by paying her enough for her to get her own place, by having the dog go to doggy daycare during the day, etc - or your nanny is going to have to choose between working for you and her dog. She will have to find herself a new job and apartment, or find the dog a new home, or bring the dog to the shelter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like certain posters missed the fact that this ain’t OPs dog here . Why is she cruel for wanting to not have someone else’s dog destroy her house and bark at her all day? It sounds like she has been pretty reasonable for quite a while but does she have to allow someone else’s dog to do this to her life for years or else “bad lesson for your kids”?

Sigh. People really don't listen. I doubt the dog destroyed the BF's house and barked all day there. It happens here BECAUSE the family isn't handling the dog right.

Anonymous wrote:Bark shock collar and training.

Anonymous wrote:I feel like certain posters missed the fact that this ain’t OPs dog here . Why is she cruel for wanting to not have someone else’s dog destroy her house and bark at her all day? It sounds like she has been pretty reasonable for quite a while but does she have to allow someone else’s dog to do this to her life for years or else “bad lesson for your kids”?

Anonymous wrote:Have nanny make dealing with the dog part of the curriculum. She can help your kids understand that when a creature is old, infirm and annoying, it's time to cut them loose or, preferably, euthanize them. That's particularly important placed in the context of a young person in a new country, all alone with no family or friends or resources that might help find a workable alternative.

You can even schedule Laps of Love to come to your house during a convenient non-nap time so they can all watch and learn. They'll never forget this valuable lesson and what kind of person you and your DH are, and how you wish them to treat others.

Anonymous wrote:Have nanny make dealing with the dog part of the curriculum. She can help your kids understand that when a creature is old, infirm and annoying, it's time to cut them loose or, preferably, euthanize them. That's particularly important placed in the context of a young person in a new country, all alone with no family or friends or resources that might help find a workable alternative.

You can even schedule Laps of Love to come to your house during a convenient non-nap time so they can all watch and learn. They'll never forget this valuable lesson and what kind of person you and your DH are, and how you wish them to treat others.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She just brought the dog into your house without asking you? She either needs to find a new permanent home for the dog or board it. I don’t know of many nanny employers who would be okay with having a barking, scratching dog in their home.

She asked us and said it was a very temporary solution
But it’s been a month and she really has no options
She doesn’t want to leave but the dog can’t stay

What about giving her one more month - or three more weeks - to find a solution. Work with a trainer to get the dog to bark less and pee not on the floor, or find the dog a new home. Just realistically, it is going to be hard to find this dog a home. I'm sure your nanny knows that. This has got to be awful for her, as it is for you, too. But maybe she has a friend who will keep the dog - she could even pay a friend to keep the dog. Just, try to work with her so the dog isn't in a shelter. Old pets don't belong in shelters. It's summer, shelters are full. If she is going to euthanize the dog because there is nowhere for him to live, then it would be kinder to have a vet do it and not outsource that to a shelter.

I appreciate your kindness
She’s young and hasn’t done anything to help the situation over the last month
I had to buy the bark collar
This morning as the dog was barking and she was trying to quiet it she walked away from the stove.
The smoke detector went off, we have young kids who need her attention
I was at work but my DH was pissed as he had to jump off a work call to turn off the stove
Then the kids got upset

She’s a student and we all appreciate her so much but she doesn’t seem to be able to think through this
DH wants us to give her until Friday to find a solution
Someone mentioned doggy day care which I didn’t actually know exists!

Anonymous wrote:Given the fact she left the stove to tend to the dog would’ve been cause for me to fire her immediately. Tell her dog has to go today if not she can go with him and find else where to live. You wouldn’t be wrong especially if it’s explicitly stated no animals/pets are allowed in your lease/contract.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP it seems like the problem is you told the nanny they'd have to find a solution to the dog- but maybe in a wishy washy way?- and now, from what you have said yourself, the nanny is doing no work regarding how to either get the dog trained better, sent to a daycare during her working hours (I mean this is the bare minimum solution here) or rehomed. You've stated you yourself have done all the work and she hasn't really done anything. You need to sit her down and have a come to Jesus, and tell her she has X amount of days/weeks to find somewhere else for the dog to live- and remind her that you never agreed to have the dog live in your home, and outline the different ways it is negatively affecting your husband's work and how it dislikes your children and remind her of the time the smoke alarm went off and she ignored it because she was tending to her dog. And tell her that at the end of X days/weeks, the dog WILL be gone from your home, and if that means the nanny is gone with the dog, so be it, but the dog has an end date and you are sticking to it. You need to be firm because it sounds like she is young and taking advantage of the fact that you are a pushover.

Just stop. We are talking about a young college student with no family to fall back on who is working her a$$ her dealing with OP's three kids WITH the stressed out husband IN the house. She's not "taking advantage" of anyone -- she's overwhelmed and you are all heartless.

The nanny is an employee. My employer does not deal with my personal issues for me or act like a surrogate parent. The nanny is an adult and an irresponsible one at that.