Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 12:35     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


This seems pretty exclusive and a relationship. I do not know what else you want.


NP I’d want a sign of commitment.


What kind of commitment? I really don't get it. (mid-40s woman here) And personally, I would not offer any commitment until I know I am sexually compatible with someone. This is truly a confusing post to me.
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 12:31     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


This seems pretty exclusive and a relationship. I do not know what else you want.


NP I’d want a sign of commitment.
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 12:21     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
He’s clearly dating to meet his physical needs only and it looks like he’s ok with where things are with you and doesn’t need or want to escalate things. He seems to be the kind of men who will take what you offer, better than nothing or he just needs something different, especially if her gets a release.

If you last checked in two weeks ago then this is not going to turn into a relationship. Stop wasting your time.


Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 12:02     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


This seems pretty exclusive and a relationship. I do not know what else you want.


I agree. What does OP want to change; what does the guy think he’s being asked to change?
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 11:58     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


Well… in that case instead of badgering him more you should become just a tiny bit more unavailable. Like a tiny bit. Make him miss you or feel jealous and he’ll probably come forward with the kind of declaration you want. You know what I mean?


I think every manipulator knows what you mean.
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 11:53     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:I’ve been dating a guy for 3 months. We’ve been very physically intimate, but have not had intercourse. I want to wait until we decide to be in a relationship. He is wanting to take things slow in that regard, which I’m fine with.

However, the way my mind works, is that- he doesn’t know if he wants me to be his girlfriend, but he wants to have sex with me. If that’s the case, then I’ll wait to have sex with him. Am I thinking about this correctly?


Is this the comedy routine guy? Dump him.

If not,

Of course he's ready for sex, they always are. YOU decide what YOU want.
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 11:51     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


Well… in that case instead of badgering him more you should become just a tiny bit more unavailable. Like a tiny bit. Make him miss you or feel jealous and he’ll probably come forward with the kind of declaration you want. You know what I mean?


OP: Yes, I know exactly what you mean. I agree that I shouldn't bring it up again. He asked me to get together today, and I told him that I'm busy (which I am).
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 11:47     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


Well… in that case instead of badgering him more you should become just a tiny bit more unavailable. Like a tiny bit. Make him miss you or feel jealous and he’ll probably come forward with the kind of declaration you want. You know what I mean?
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 11:35     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.


This seems pretty exclusive and a relationship. I do not know what else you want.
Anonymous
Post 04/25/2022 10:52     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.


OP: we last checked in about 2 weeks ago. At that time, I told him that I'm very attracted to him and would like to sleep with him, but that I would feel more comfortable waiting until we decide we're ready for a relationship. He knows that I am. He told me that he's "smitten" with me and that he has taken down his online dating profile. We left it as we agreed to keep doing what we're doing, no pressure.

I don't want to keep doing the same thing indefinitely, though.
Anonymous
Post 04/24/2022 21:59     Subject: Re:He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:Women consider intercourse different because it has the possibility of pregnancy.


So is OP doing anal during their 3 hours in bed, then?
Anonymous
Post 04/24/2022 21:48     Subject: Re:He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
It's ok to want different things. I am divorced and have no desire to want a serious relationship. There are lots of women who feel similarly

I think the PP has a good suggestion to ask him but be prepared for an answer you don't want
Anonymous
Post 04/24/2022 21:32     Subject: He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
When did you last check in about this? If it was a month or so ago, I’d be honest with him — I’m waiting for a relationship to have sex, I’m very attracted to you, but if you feel like you’re not ready I wonder if maybe this just isn’t the right situation for us? You might get a response you’re not expecting, like a yes I am able to commit. But either way clarity at this point would be good.
Anonymous
Post 04/24/2022 21:22     Subject: Re:He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
Anonymous wrote:WHen did the world become this way? How did we get from women should be virgins before marriage to people are wasting their time if they haven’t had sex in 3 months of dating?

Whatever. You do you. I just have different needs emotionally with people before sex.



It was a process that happened in modernizing nations during the 19th and 20th centuries, involving some combination of

1) Secularization
2) Women’s rights
3) Birth control

In roughly that order.
Anonymous
Post 04/24/2022 21:15     Subject: Re:He’s ready for sex but not a relationship
3 months is more than enough time to know if he wants to be in a relationship with you. Dump him, he's a loser and you're wasting your time.