Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Things have gotten worse at my school. Kids have gotten comfortable and spring is here. That means, there has been an uptick in outrageous behaviors. Today, I had to half drag a kindergarten student upstairs to the office because he started hitting/hicking us. This afternoon, the entire downstairs at my school had to listen to screaming from a pre-k kid who has been running laps around the school for the last few weeks. I also have a student who eats everything and anything under the sun. Thankfully her classmates tell me when this happens so I can fish it out of her mouth (today it was a twist tie and a cap eraser). My student with the huge behavior issues was absent today so it was a pretty calm day.
I've heard awful stories from the middle school. The admin is always busy with them so they rarely have time to help us out. We are exhausted and we still have two weeks left before spring break. Teachers call in sick so much due to the stress and exhaustion and there are no subs (who can blame them with these behavior issues?) And our school isn't even that bad compared to others I've heard about.
Parents need to be called to pick up their kids or to sit with them in class if they cannot behave.
So they should just leave work every day to come to school? How realistic is that?
Perhaps that will motivate them to actually parent their out of control kids and/or get them psychiatrist help so that they won’t have to keep missing work. Shrug.
Wow you really hit the low end of DCUM. Shrug.
Gross.
Its gross to do nothing and just send your kids to school pretending its nothing. Some kids have real mental health issues and the schools should focus on helping them. Not the made up mental health issues that parents use to handle their kids poor behavior.
No. That is not a school's job. That is a parent's job. Do your job, parent. Get help for your kids. Schools should focus on teaching and learning. Parents are supposed to focus on everything else. Stop making schools responsible for doing something for your kid because of your inability to do your job as a parent.
I am a parent writing this.
Well current federal law disagrees with you, but I guess you could take it up with your senator and rep.
You write as if it were so easy for any parent to just pick up the phone and schedule free weekly sessions with a qualified therapist within walking distance. There are MAJOR barriers for many parents in this process. None the least of which is understanding mental health, the utility of therapy in it, and trust in a largely white pool of therapists. - a white teacher
I’m sorry to hear that. Your kids’ mental health is still *your* responsibility, not the school’s. Figure it out.
So let’s say that your child comes to me as his/her/they’re teacher to confide that they’ve been sexually assaulted, are suicidal, etc. You would prefer that I shrug and tell them it’s not my responsibility? I guarantee you that many will harm themselves before confiding in a parent. Be careful- it could be YOUR child in a dangerous mental health crisis one day. And, in my experience, the “ tough luck” parents are not particularly approachable for their children.
I would expect you to call and inform the parent of the minor child so they can handle it. If the parent is the abuser, I would expect you to fulfill your duties as a mandated reporter to CPS.
Next question?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Things have gotten worse at my school. Kids have gotten comfortable and spring is here. That means, there has been an uptick in outrageous behaviors. Today, I had to half drag a kindergarten student upstairs to the office because he started hitting/hicking us. This afternoon, the entire downstairs at my school had to listen to screaming from a pre-k kid who has been running laps around the school for the last few weeks. I also have a student who eats everything and anything under the sun. Thankfully her classmates tell me when this happens so I can fish it out of her mouth (today it was a twist tie and a cap eraser). My student with the huge behavior issues was absent today so it was a pretty calm day.
I've heard awful stories from the middle school. The admin is always busy with them so they rarely have time to help us out. We are exhausted and we still have two weeks left before spring break. Teachers call in sick so much due to the stress and exhaustion and there are no subs (who can blame them with these behavior issues?) And our school isn't even that bad compared to others I've heard about.
Parents need to be called to pick up their kids or to sit with them in class if they cannot behave.
So they should just leave work every day to come to school? How realistic is that?
Perhaps that will motivate them to actually parent their out of control kids and/or get them psychiatrist help so that they won’t have to keep missing work. Shrug.
Wow you really hit the low end of DCUM. Shrug.
Gross.
Its gross to do nothing and just send your kids to school pretending its nothing. Some kids have real mental health issues and the schools should focus on helping them. Not the made up mental health issues that parents use to handle their kids poor behavior.
No. That is not a school's job. That is a parent's job. Do your job, parent. Get help for your kids. Schools should focus on teaching and learning. Parents are supposed to focus on everything else. Stop making schools responsible for doing something for your kid because of your inability to do your job as a parent.
I am a parent writing this.
There are huge barriers to accessing mental health services for kids right now. We tried for months to get a therapist for my child. Almost none were taking new patients or insurance. Each place we contacted referred us somewhere else and those places were booked too. The need is huge but availability is low. Hence why schools were supposed to get funding to hire more child psychologists and counselors because there is so much demand.
I have a friend whose son boarded in the ER for a month because there were no peds in-patient psych beds available.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
A few months into the Pandemic, I talked to a school counselor at my kid's school. My child (9) was freaking out at any request, throwing tantrums, hiding out in her room for 23 hours a day because anytime we interacted she was ending up with a consequence. The counselor was really helpful. On her recommendation, I focused on positive parenting, reduced my expectations, focused on a few key things that I required. None of us had parented through a pandemic, or been a kid through a pandemic, or taught through a pandemic.
I'm glad you were able to use the help you were given. Most parents weren't interested in help. The pandemic didn't bring up new issues with their parenting. They needed parenting help from the beginning. The teachers all wish we could hire a bilingual parenting coach. This full-time person would hold mandatory meetings with parents about their roles and responsibilities as parents as well as the school's/teacher's roles and responsibilities. They could also have one-on-one family sessions to coach parents on how to parent. They just don't know how and it creates a lot of issues in the classroom. None of this is pandemic-related.
Can you give some more examples of the parents who don’t know how to parent? You mean they don’t send them to bed on time or make them do their homework?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
A few months into the Pandemic, I talked to a school counselor at my kid's school. My child (9) was freaking out at any request, throwing tantrums, hiding out in her room for 23 hours a day because anytime we interacted she was ending up with a consequence. The counselor was really helpful. On her recommendation, I focused on positive parenting, reduced my expectations, focused on a few key things that I required. None of us had parented through a pandemic, or been a kid through a pandemic, or taught through a pandemic.
I'm glad you were able to use the help you were given. Most parents weren't interested in help. The pandemic didn't bring up new issues with their parenting. They needed parenting help from the beginning. The teachers all wish we could hire a bilingual parenting coach. This full-time person would hold mandatory meetings with parents about their roles and responsibilities as parents as well as the school's/teacher's roles and responsibilities. They could also have one-on-one family sessions to coach parents on how to parent. They just don't know how and it creates a lot of issues in the classroom. None of this is pandemic-related.
Can you give some more examples of the parents who don’t know how to parent? You mean they don’t send them to bed on time or make them do their homework?
DP but I have many students whose parents allow them to play video games all night, send them to school with exclusively junk food, and don’t enforce any sort of homework/independent reading at home. They come to school and have no motivation to do work, because they’re exhausted and have no stamina for completing tasks. They have no responsibilities or boundaries. I also have students who are 8, 9, and 10 who expect teachers to blow their noses for them. Their parents do everything for them and have taught them no independence. We have kindergarten parents requesting we potty train their kids. None of them know how to tie their shoes. It’s really clear that the parents need support.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
A few months into the Pandemic, I talked to a school counselor at my kid's school. My child (9) was freaking out at any request, throwing tantrums, hiding out in her room for 23 hours a day because anytime we interacted she was ending up with a consequence. The counselor was really helpful. On her recommendation, I focused on positive parenting, reduced my expectations, focused on a few key things that I required. None of us had parented through a pandemic, or been a kid through a pandemic, or taught through a pandemic.
I'm glad you were able to use the help you were given. Most parents weren't interested in help. The pandemic didn't bring up new issues with their parenting. They needed parenting help from the beginning. The teachers all wish we could hire a bilingual parenting coach. This full-time person would hold mandatory meetings with parents about their roles and responsibilities as parents as well as the school's/teacher's roles and responsibilities. They could also have one-on-one family sessions to coach parents on how to parent. They just don't know how and it creates a lot of issues in the classroom. None of this is pandemic-related.
Can you give some more examples of the parents who don’t know how to parent? You mean they don’t send them to bed on time or make them do their homework?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
A few months into the Pandemic, I talked to a school counselor at my kid's school. My child (9) was freaking out at any request, throwing tantrums, hiding out in her room for 23 hours a day because anytime we interacted she was ending up with a consequence. The counselor was really helpful. On her recommendation, I focused on positive parenting, reduced my expectations, focused on a few key things that I required. None of us had parented through a pandemic, or been a kid through a pandemic, or taught through a pandemic.
I'm glad you were able to use the help you were given. Most parents weren't interested in help. The pandemic didn't bring up new issues with their parenting. They needed parenting help from the beginning. The teachers all wish we could hire a bilingual parenting coach. This full-time person would hold mandatory meetings with parents about their roles and responsibilities as parents as well as the school's/teacher's roles and responsibilities. They could also have one-on-one family sessions to coach parents on how to parent. They just don't know how and it creates a lot of issues in the classroom. None of this is pandemic-related.
Plenty of people from middle and higher income levels sacrificed almost all social interaction, family gatherings, travel, and visits with grandparents because they thought that doing so was in the best interest of the community and would lead to schools reopening for in-person learning. They thought they were doing the right thing, but the isolation and continuous messaging that their concerns didn't matter left these parents depleted and less able to foster a positive environment for their kids' learning. There's no shame in that, but it is shameful to suggest that kids who are struggling now come from households where their parents were checked out.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
A few months into the Pandemic, I talked to a school counselor at my kid's school. My child (9) was freaking out at any request, throwing tantrums, hiding out in her room for 23 hours a day because anytime we interacted she was ending up with a consequence. The counselor was really helpful. On her recommendation, I focused on positive parenting, reduced my expectations, focused on a few key things that I required. None of us had parented through a pandemic, or been a kid through a pandemic, or taught through a pandemic.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:School closures were the most anti-equity thing to happen in the last 50 years at least. The rich kids were largely fine, while the poor kids were largely not. You can do equity initiatives continuously for the next 10 years and still not be able to completely reverse what happened in the last 2.
At least in my neck of the woods, these was painted as "the poor (and where I am this means Black) families don't want to send their kids to in-person school". So it's this lovely thing where the people most hurt by the policy had the most support for the policy.
Was this because of Covid concern or because their kids weren’t being treated well in school or because virtual learning was so much easier logistically?
Covid concern. The narrative was "Black families are experiencing more illness and death from covid and therefore perceive more risk from sending kids to in-person school." My personal belief is that communicators failed miserably in showing that in-person school did not contribute to a higher likelihood of exposure than what those kids were experiencing alternatively.
Not just Black families but the families of low income workers who were not able to work from home. First, many of those workers who kept their jobs were at a higher risk for exposure to COVID and less likely to have health care that allowed them to go to the Doctor or hospital until they were really sick or sick leave that allowed them to not go to work when they were not feeling well. So there were higher rates of hospitalization and death among low income workers.
Second, many low income workers who have kids were not able to afford child care coverage for their kids who were not in school. So the older kids were expected to keep and eye on and help their younger siblings. You can guess how this influenced those kids ability to attend and complete virtual school. You can also guess how this influenced those kids ability to learn how to socialize and behave in a classroom.
Third, many low income families took advantage of the virtual learning so that their older kids were able to get jobs that helped the family pays its bills. It wasn't just lower income families, I read families of MC and UMC whose kids got jobs because they could. Many of the kids who found jobs did not return to in person school because they wanted to keep their jobs and staying in DL let them do that.
Fourth, even when schools returned to in-person (first 2 days then 4 days in FCPS) low income families who had younger kids at home and who could not find child care coverage, kept their older kids at home to watch their siblings while the parents worked. So while MC and UMC kids were able to return to class, if they wanted to, lower income kids were less likely to return because they were needed at home to watch siblings.
Overall, the pandemic took an exiting educational gap that was already widening and created a gulf. Lower income families bore the brunt of the pandemic in terms of health issues, hospitalizations, and deaths. The kids of these families were less likely to have the resources needed to have a solid chance of making distance learning work (reliable internet, good computers, parents who might be able to help with distance learning) I would fully expect that schools with a higher percentage of low income families are really struggling this year and will continue to struggle for a while.
The MC and UMC kids who are struggling probably is more attributable to parents who decided it wasn't worth the effort and just let their kids do whatever at home for the year. We saw plenty of posts stating that was happening and now those parents are complaining about their kids being behind. A bunch of those families posted that they were not making their kids go back to in-person when their kids really needed to be in-person. And I saw families who looked for ways to help their kids and make the best of the situation with varying degrees of success.
Anonymous wrote:I teach in a Title 1 school. Most families in our school live with extended family so childcare was not an issue for most of them. They all got laptops and hot spots and kits of supplies for each child. We reached out to every parent to ask what else they needed. Most of the absences were due to parenting issues. “Larla doesn’t like to _________.” Go to bed, wake up on time, do Zoom school, do class work, participate in class, etc. so our phone calls basically ended up as parenting sessions.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:School closures were the most anti-equity thing to happen in the last 50 years at least. The rich kids were largely fine, while the poor kids were largely not. You can do equity initiatives continuously for the next 10 years and still not be able to completely reverse what happened in the last 2.
At least in my neck of the woods, these was painted as "the poor (and where I am this means Black) families don't want to send their kids to in-person school". So it's this lovely thing where the people most hurt by the policy had the most support for the policy.
Was this because of Covid concern or because their kids weren’t being treated well in school or because virtual learning was so much easier logistically?
Covid concern. The narrative was "Black families are experiencing more illness and death from covid and therefore perceive more risk from sending kids to in-person school." My personal belief is that communicators failed miserably in showing that in-person school did not contribute to a higher likelihood of exposure than what those kids were experiencing alternatively.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:School closures were the most anti-equity thing to happen in the last 50 years at least. The rich kids were largely fine, while the poor kids were largely not. You can do equity initiatives continuously for the next 10 years and still not be able to completely reverse what happened in the last 2.
See, there’s these events called pandemics. You can’t just pretend they’re not going on.
This is totally false. I switched from a “poor” largely minority district to a “rich” homogenous white district mid year. The kids in the lower SES school were much better behaved than the kids I work with now. The attitude toward authority in my new district is really poor. Think kids who say things like, “I don’t have to listen to you, my parents pay your salary.” They are ten or eleven at most, this is elementary school. Students verbally refuse to do their work or follow directions. They mock their classmates when they’re speaking, which is disgusting and unkind. I’m considering returning to my old job. I never had this problem in the lower SES school, before, during, or “after” COVID (the pandemic hasn’t ended, we’re just ignoring it). The idea that rich kids are doing better is patently untrue. While they have more advantages, they aren’t better behaved or more academically advanced. Let’s do away with that stereotype.
??? I was talking about why schools why closed.
The internet ate the post you were responding to, which was about how rich kids are cool and school closures were anti equity.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:School closures were the most anti-equity thing to happen in the last 50 years at least. The rich kids were largely fine, while the poor kids were largely not. You can do equity initiatives continuously for the next 10 years and still not be able to completely reverse what happened in the last 2.
At least in my neck of the woods, these was painted as "the poor (and where I am this means Black) families don't want to send their kids to in-person school". So it's this lovely thing where the people most hurt by the policy had the most support for the policy.
Was this because of Covid concern or because their kids weren’t being treated well in school or because virtual learning was so much easier logistically?