Our HHI is 200K with one SAHM. We have 2 kids in private at a cost of 50K. My MIL pays the full tuition directly. She is not a wealthy woman, by any means, but has a paid residence with low expenses, and deeply values education. I am aware my MIL won't be paying the tuition much longer, so my wife wants to get back into the workforce and hopefully make around 70K to pay the tuition for both kids.

Our local public schools and feeders are the best in our area, but still, feel our private school edges them in size of the classroom, rigorous curriculum, foreign language mastery, and amenities. We feel truly blessed my MIL offered to pay because, during Covid times, it was certainly the best decision we made, as the school remained in person and we have elementary-aged kids.

Hope this info helped.

We make 300-400k (depending on year) and have 3 kids. We will be able to do full pay college. But we can’t easily afford private elementary/ high school. We spend on camps, music lessons, savings.

If we had a kid who really needed it, we could pull it off. But I’m grateful we don’t.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

This.

Of the parents that I know in private, about 1/2 either have grandparents pay directly OR were gifted trusts/inheritance/parent gifts earlier in life. I don't think the family money idea is urban legend at all. It is the #1 reason why people get ahead in life.

You have it a bit backwards. I make a high income and haven't needed or received a penny from my parents since I graduated college. This is because I went to private schools my entire life and made incredible connections, most importantly a foot in the door for valuable internship opportunities.

I grew up wealthy and had been surrounded by it my entire life. Wealth opens doors wide and those connections from even high school still serve me today. It would be comical to take money from my parents for tuition.

My children are afforded the same connections and by the mere luck of birth are growing up with peers who's parents and entire social circle are people who will open doors for them. They are many ways to skin a cat. I see a lot of value in private schools and it goes way beyond the education. It's all about the peer group.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

Disagree. I know quite a few people at the top privates in the DC area, where the grandparents pay tuition directly to the school. (There is some tax advantage to paying the school directly, in that it does not count toward the annual gift limit of approximately $18,000 per person per year.)

Or if the grandparents are not paying, often the parents are paying out of investments, and not necessarily out of HHI. So just asking about HHI and tuition makes me realize that the OP perhaps should be cautious. Every year, it seems that there are people who need to leave when the tuition costs become too burdensome.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $800k/year and I don’t feel like we can send our 2 kids to private. We just started making this much, we have no family money, and we won’t inherit anything. Although $800k is a lot, we have to think about kids’ college and our retirement. Spending money on private schools just does not seem like a financially sound move. FWIW, our kids are at a private pre-K now, and we are definitely on the lower end of the income distribution (by quite a bit).

You don’t live in dc I guess

MoCo

This is such a bunch of BS. You are not on the lower end of the income distribution at your preschool with a HHI of $800K.
You need a massive, massive reality check.

Loony tunes

I don't make $800K but if I did I would consider myself to be below anyone whose grandparents were paying. If that is how op is looking at it she may well be below many of the other parents.

I don’t understand this at all… why would you “consider yourself below” anyone living off mom and dad?!?

Because someone dependent on income (that they may have only had for a few years) is inherently less secure than someone with a giant trust fund.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $800k/year and I don’t feel like we can send our 2 kids to private. We just started making this much, we have no family money, and we won’t inherit anything. Although $800k is a lot, we have to think about kids’ college and our retirement. Spending money on private schools just does not seem like a financially sound move. FWIW, our kids are at a private pre-K now, and we are definitely on the lower end of the income distribution (by quite a bit).

You don’t live in dc I guess

MoCo

This is such a bunch of BS. You are not on the lower end of the income distribution at your preschool with a HHI of $800K.
You need a massive, massive reality check.

Loony tunes

I don't make $800K but if I did I would consider myself to be below anyone whose grandparents were paying. If that is how op is looking at it she may well be below many of the other parents.

I don’t understand this at all… why would you “consider yourself below” anyone living off mom and dad?!?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

This.

Of the parents that I know in private, about 1/2 either have grandparents pay directly OR were gifted trusts/inheritance/parent gifts earlier in life. I don't think the family money idea is urban legend at all. It is the #1 reason why people get ahead in life.

In NYC this is definitely true.

As I've gotten only... a realize the family money idea isn't just an idea. It's a reality for a small group of people in this country.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

This.

Of the parents that I know in private, about 1/2 either have grandparents pay directly OR were gifted trusts/inheritance/parent gifts earlier in life. I don't think the family money idea is urban legend at all. It is the #1 reason why people get ahead in life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

I don't know, I work with a lot of people with high incomes with kids in private school who I assume pay for it themselves because I know their payscale and know they make $500K+. I also have a lot of friends through my kids former preschool who send their kids to private schools and who I either know or suspect are getting help with tuition from grandparents. These are people in couples where one parent works for the government and the other stays home and they live in a modest house in Chevy Chase or AU Park and have three kids at a Big 3 school and send them all to fancy sleepaway camps and take nice vacations. When I have talked to them about schools and pros and cons of public vs private they never say anything about being lucky to have gotten financial aid or that paying tuition is a sacrifice but it is worth it (while I hear that all the time that private is a sacrifice but worth it from my friends at work). In some cases these friends have mentioned trust funds, in other cases they haven't but I know they went to private schools themselves and regularly spend the summer at their parents' place in Maine/Nantucket etc. I guess it is possible these people are just good investors or won the lottery - but grandparent help definitely seems like the most likely scenario. I don't think there is anything wrong with it - I hope to be able to do this for my grandchildren - but I do think this definitely isn't uncommon, especially in some circles (I tend to run in the Jewish intellectual non-profit crowd).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HHI north of 600k and we are about to send our special needs DS to private just for the low teacher to student ratio. DS2 just entered public school but we may enroll him in a private in the future but it is because we believe MCPS's curriculum to have degraded in the last decade (especially with Eureka math). DS2 is an incredibly smart 5 year old, who is able to read at a second grade level, do multiplication in his head, and understand concepts such as infinity and resonance frequencies. He is also a very good communicator. However, he is definitely not challenged at MCPS and pretends to count for the simple addition problems they have him do.

This indicates nothing.

NP really? I have a 4.5yo and can’t see her being able to do those things in the next 6-12 months. (Which is fine, she doesn’t have to, she is a delight)

Anonymous wrote:

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.

This is true. My kids have been in private since 3yrs old, now middle school and highschool. Most of their parents pay (some at great sacrifice). Most parents also have high HHI. Of my 4 kids' friends and all the parents I know through them, my guess is less than a handful have any support whatsoever from grandparents.

Perhaps speculating about grandparents bankrolling tuition makes people feel better about themselves or their personal financial situation?

It indicates that public wasn't going to work for her kid. If her kid is advanced as she claims, check back in several years and I will guarantee that her kid is still EG. Intellectual stagnation in public (and lousy privates) is real.

I would caution you about private, because it creates a stressful situation to make those monthly tuition payments out of your HHI. Many student have their tuition funded by grandparents.

Grandparents paying tuition has almost risen to the level of urban myth. Sure, there are some kids at the Big3 my kids attend whose grandparents pay or help, but they are certainly the minority. I say this knowing there are more kids than I know being funded by grandparents; most parents are paying themselves.