Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 17:01     Subject: Disappointment
W&M is the top choice of her choices. Great school.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 16:17     Subject: Disappointment
Would love to know what OP's kid decided. OP, did any admitted student day visits win your kid over? Any waitlists open up? How did things shake out in the end?
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 15:01     Subject: Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:Anyone else facing a lot of disappointment during this cycle? DD got into a couple target schools + most of her safeties... Rejected or WL from the rest. She was (imo and told to us by many others) a great applicant - High stats, great ECs + essays, LORs... Her interviews all went very well, especially JHU. She applied to JHU EA and the rest RD, and we're from NOVA. Intended major is BME (biomed engineering).

Stats:
4.0 UW/4.7 W GPA
1570 SAT (800 M, 770 R&W)
14 APs, all 5s

ECs:
- A few regional awards (STEM)
- 200+ volunteer hours @ local hospital
- Founder of non-profit
- Research w/ prof at T30
- Competitive summer program for BME
- Lots of community service

Results:
JHU EA - Deferred -> Rejected
Princeton - Rejected
Brown - Rejected
Dartmouth - Rejected
Columbia - Rejected
Duke - Rejected
UVA - WL
Cornell - WL
CMU - WL
UNC CH - WL
VT - Accepted
W&M - Accepted
Lehigh - Accepted
UPitt - Accepted

DD is incredibly upset and so are we... JHU was her dream school but she relied on UVA + CMU as well. Anyone here confused and facing a similar situation?We all were convinced that DD had it in the bag - Worst of all is that many of her classmates w/ lower stats and worse ECs have gotten into a few of these schools.


Work her a$$ off in the fall and apply to transfer.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 12:41     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Be very, very excited about state schools most kids can get into. Talk up the amazing things their graduates are doing. Look around and point out the kind and well-functioning adults in your neighborhood and family who have gone to all sorts of colleges. Emphasize no college is a magic pill for success. Teach your child that their success lies in their ability to work hard and push through difficulties and that success can be won at any college (or no college at all!) in America. Do not even tour hard to get into colleges or talk about them until you have a foundation of safety and target schools that are a good fit academically and financially and where your child will be excited to go to and where they have a vision of what they will do and try while they are there. This process of discernment will also help your child figure out which reach schools are a good fit and what they are looking for at them, which will also make them a stronger candidate if they do apply to a highly rejective college.


In some states it’s more or just as competitive to get into the state flagship and others as a top private. With the price of college so high and merit/aid so unpredictable, state schools are getting apps from everyone that meets the base requirements. This includes all the high stat kids. State schools often distribute admission across zip codes , counties, and schools. So even if your state school has a 40% acceptance and your kid is well above the bar, if your kid is from a high performing school, zip code, or county they could be rejected.

I spent years telling my kid that it’s a lottery, great stats buy you a lottery ticket nothing more. If your kid is high performing, they will likely be in a group that sweeps them into the frenzy. It still didn’t blunt his sadness about being rejected from his top choice especially when they see classmates who were lower stats or lied on their apps get in. The one solace is that they won’t be alone. For every cheering, I can’t believe I got in, there are twenty with higher stats who did not get in.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 11:40     Subject: Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:I really think it was the major. BME is just very tough. For example, Hopkins is number the number one ranked program. And 215 kids are pursuing it at CMU.

Pitt is 28th. So, that is a great consolation prize.


Yes, major matters a LOT at some of these schools.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 11:39     Subject: Disappointment
I really think it was the major. BME is just very tough. For example, Hopkins is number the number one ranked program. And 215 kids are pursuing it at CMU.

Pitt is 28th. So, that is a great consolation prize.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 11:38     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.


What stood out to me in that reddit thread"
Teacher recommendations and essays matter way more than you think. A lot of Ivies and top schools use something called a "personality score." (EDIT: not necessarily a personality score, but how well you would bond in their specific community as a person). I even know someone with a 1300 SAT and basically zero extracurriculars who got waitlisted at Harvard purely because of his teacher recs and essays. For more info, he didn’t even get into our state flagship either. State schools are much more stats based so it shows that academically, this person wasn't your traditional Harvard candidate, but still was put into the pool of potential candidates.
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 11:25     Subject: Disappointment
Outcome seems about right. Nothing unique about OPs child so not sure why they were shooting for the stars
Anonymous
Post 06/16/2025 10:56     Subject: Disappointment
OP, congrats to your DD. She sounds amazing. How she is feeling about everything now?
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 15:07     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.


This is why you hear about a URM who gets in to all Ivies.


Funnily enough at my kid’s DMV private, the girl who swept the ivies is Asian!


Indian boy (!!!) at our non-DMV private!!
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 14:43     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.


This is why you hear about a URM who gets in to all Ivies.


Funnily enough at my kid’s DMV private, the girl who swept the ivies is Asian!
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 11:49     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.


The kids who get into many T10/T20 have a lot in common (From a diff reddit post):

:I’ve worked with plenty of students admitted to multiple T10s. In my experience, my cross-admit students usually have:

stats that immediately put them in the top half of the incoming freshman class — 1550+ SAT, 4.0 GPA, ranked top 1% or their high school class, tons of APs and dual-enrollment (lots of 5s) [NOTE: this is public high school kids]

thoughtful, self-reflective Personal Statements that took many months to write and 10+ drafts

lots of care in every supplemental essay to show great fit with each college and the specific opportunities they’ll take advantage of on campus

at least one EC with significant community impact, OR student has significant family responsibilities

lots of care writing and editing the Activities List to really capture the impact of every EC

genuinely interested in their field (reading books, watching documentaries), not just obsessed with prestige

well-spoken and articulate — so likely to interview well

close relationships with multiple teachers and a standout student in their school community, so probably strong LORs

generally they seem nice and kind ☺️"
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 11:43     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.


This is why you hear about a URM who gets in to all Ivies.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 11:37     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Grades. It's all about grades. Little room for error. The rest is window dressing.


Tell that to my DC who has a 4.0 in the most rigorous class (plus near-perfect SATs and all 5s in AP exams).

If you really want to avoid disappointment, see it as a lottery and be sure to stress the wonderful aspects of schools outside the T20.


If your kid is that smart, they should understand that all T20 schools are highly rejective, that most who apply "meet the academic standard needed" so most will be rejected. It is simple statistics. So yes it's like the lottery, even if you get a ticket (high stats), 90%+ are rejected.


How do we explain situations where one kid gets into multiple T20, though, and another only gets into one? Is it luck? Is it that those schools are looking for the same thing? Or is it something else in the application?

Thought this recent Reddit post was really interesting:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/1k98ye2/reflection_as_i_see_26_freaking_out_on_here/


The overlap on the Venn diagram is huge. Schools select according to their institutional priorities which are mostly the same priorities of other institutions so an application attractive to one is likely attractive to many.

There was a wild thread not too long ago the demonstrated the fundamental lack of understanding of Probability among the highly educated.
Anonymous
Post 04/28/2025 11:06     Subject: Re:Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:as a parent of a current 9th grader hoping to avoid disappointment, is there anything OP's child should have done differently? Be more "spikey"? Pick a less competitive major? Or is it just a lottery? Get more excited about "lower ranked" schools? TIA!


Be very, very excited about state schools most kids can get into. Talk up the amazing things their graduates are doing. Look around and point out the kind and well-functioning adults in your neighborhood and family who have gone to all sorts of colleges. Emphasize no college is a magic pill for success. Teach your child that their success lies in their ability to work hard and push through difficulties and that success can be won at any college (or no college at all!) in America. Do not even tour hard to get into colleges or talk about them until you have a foundation of safety and target schools that are a good fit academically and financially and where your child will be excited to go to and where they have a vision of what they will do and try while they are there. This process of discernment will also help your child figure out which reach schools are a good fit and what they are looking for at them, which will also make them a stronger candidate if they do apply to a highly rejective college.