Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would loose 20lbs. You are a tad overweight and probably attract men that look down on you…and the weight probably affects your self esteem

Overweight? I wear a size small(I'm also multi-racial) and while I was previously more athletic(and stopped due to injury), I was so bony and skinny! I'm happy with my weight now.

Well, maybe you are happy with your weight but 150lbs with hight 5.5 is not "bony and skinny" by any standard. I am 5.9 at 141lbs, and my husband thinks I should loose a little bit to pre-birth 134lbs.

Men like woman in such a weight they can make love against the wall.

Not OP, but You and your husband have issues.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would loose 20lbs. You are a tad overweight and probably attract men that look down on you…and the weight probably affects your self esteem

Overweight? I wear a size small(I'm also multi-racial) and while I was previously more athletic(and stopped due to injury), I was so bony and skinny! I'm happy with my weight now.

Well, maybe you are happy with your weight but 150lbs with hight 5.5 is not "bony and skinny" by any standard. I am 5.9 at 141lbs, and my husband thinks I should loose a little bit to pre-birth 134lbs.

Men like woman in such a weight they can make love against the wall.

Not OP, but…yikes, sorry about your shitty husband.

OP, may I ask, what do you wear on these first dates?

Men are pretty simple creatures and usually aren't too discerning until maybe the third date so I'm wondering if your love of comfort over cute may be sending the wrong signal if you are mostly going on first dates. We can definitely help!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

Wait, you’re mostly going on first dates??? Changes everything. You can’t judge too much off of a single date! Do you feel a spark or even want to see these dudes again?? Perhaps be a bit more discerning yourself and take the pressure off both of you (your dates may feel it…..) for the first SEVERAL dates so you can feel things out.

Do you read what she says ? She’s not landing 2 or 3 dates which is why she does 1st only

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

Wait, you’re mostly going on first dates??? Changes everything. You can’t judge too much off of a single date! Do you feel a spark or even want to see these dudes again?? Perhaps be a bit more discerning yourself and take the pressure off both of you (your dates may feel it…..) for the first SEVERAL dates so you can feel things out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would loose 20lbs. You are a tad overweight and probably attract men that look down on you…and the weight probably affects your self esteem

Overweight? I wear a size small(I'm also multi-racial) and while I was previously more athletic(and stopped due to injury), I was so bony and skinny! I'm happy with my weight now.

Well, maybe you are happy with your weight but 150lbs with hight 5.5 is not "bony and skinny" by any standard. I am 5.9 at 141lbs, and my husband thinks I should loose a little bit to pre-birth 134lbs.

Men like woman in such a weight they can make love against the wall.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

DP. How much are you dating, how are you meeting these men? What are they like? Have you liked any of them? You are either picking the wrong guys or you are really closed off and not making an effort.

I meet guys through Bumble and Hinge. I rarely get approached in public.

OP, you attract who you are.

If you want someone better, better yourself as a woman.

That starts with asking yourself what a man wants from a relationship beyond sex. Who are you the rest of the time?

Start there, fix that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

DP. How much are you dating, how are you meeting these men? What are they like? Have you liked any of them? You are either picking the wrong guys or you are really closed off and not making an effort.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

I usually get rejected before I can mention the 2nd or 3rd date. It usually, not feeling a connection. We didn't have any chemistry. Best of luck. My last 3 dates ended up this way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are trying fight above your weight class.

Op here, I'm honestly not even sure what guys are my type at this point.

Maybe the opposite you go for. If date is dull, book 2nd and 3rd with him.

Comfy over cute may not work to attract a guy ; they are visual so try to emphasize the cute

Why are people assuming OP is a woman?

Anonymous wrote:OP, I dated someone who sounds like you. Nice woman, attractive, dressed well. But what is nice? She was polite to wait staff and kind to animals?

What she didn't have was real hobbies, curiosities, and a life plan. Nothing to make me think she had strong opinions about anything. Looked her up a few years ago and her life did not wind up being so great and that's sad. What are you doing to make yourself an interesting person so that someone wants to know you better?

Anyone who brings up life plans during a date is … not someone worth dating again.

Here’s a different take as a guy: why not have a nurturing vibe. As someone above mentioned to sell yourself and have hobbies. I think these can be overrated. Why not “sell” that you are stable and focused on pleasing your man. Not in an offensive anti feminist way. Rather in a “I’m a good partner and when I’m given the same respect back I’m all in” kind of way. I had a girlfriend like this once but I moved away and it was too soon to marry her. I looked her up later and she appears to be married with kids and works in an interesting field.