Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:16
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Outside of private school tuition, vacations, donations, and routine savings (401K, HSA, 529s, brokerage, etc), we spend 18K a month. Although we can "afford" it, I sometimes feel like we are just bleeding money, and I'm not quite sure what our worst offender is. So here's the breakdown of our monthly "budget" (which really is a snapshot of how we spend money more than dollar limits). What strikes you as the most absurd category? Or is it just that everything is a bit bloated? We are a family of five, two adults and three kids.
Auto and Transport - 1,000
(includes 750 for a super low interest car loan and 250 for gas, ubers, misc. repairs, car washes)
Children - 2,000
(includes 500 a month for regular babysitter, 500 a month on clothing for 3 young kids, and about 1000 a month on activities, music lessons, etc)
Entertainment - 500
(includes TV services, digital subscriptions, amazon prime, tickets to events, etc)
Food and Dining - 3000
(about 1K a month eating out, 2K on groceries for family of 5)
Gifts - 500
(for extended family at Christmas, plus weddings, birthdays, etc)
Health and Fitness - 100
(Peloton, yoga classes, etc - used to be more before covid)
Home and Property - 7400
(electricity and gas is 300, yard care is around 250, twice weekly housekeeper is 1250, mortgage and tax is 5500)
Insurance - 150
(life and auto)
Personal care - 500
(hair, nails, dry cleaning, etc)
Shopping - 2500
(clothes for both adults, not children, plus home goods, like vacuums or decor items, plus small random things like paper towels or advil)
Utilities - 400
(phone and internet)
I know this budget is far from "normal" (except maybe on dcum) but I'm really curious if any one category seems unusually high. Thoughts?
That is in no way normal.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:14
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
See, the cool thing about having a high income like OP (and me) is you don't have to do time-consuming, low return stuff like clip coupons, have a 150/mo entertainment budget, or constantly haggle with service providers to save a few bucks a month on cable. Time is more valuable than that, especially when there's so much obvious fluff in the budget if OP really wants to cut back. Instead of wasting time on coupons, you get to come be snarky on DCUM.
I am a very cheap person but I spend approximately 0 minutes per year on clipping coupons or haggling. The amount of time OP appears to spend on buying and curating her possessions seems overwhelming to me.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:13
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
See, the cool thing about having a high income like OP (and me) is you don't have to do time-consuming, low return stuff like clip coupons, have a 150/mo entertainment budget, or constantly haggle with service providers to save a few bucks a month on cable. Time is more valuable than that, especially when there's so much obvious fluff in the budget if OP really wants to cut back. Instead of wasting time on coupons, you get to come be snarky on DCUM.
IDK. It seems very odd. What itch is this thread scratching?
Maybe making herself feel better about whatever sacrifices led to this end- lots of money and material possessions and yet not feeling better or more satisfied about life. OP is reaching for a dopamine hit- bragging about her lifestyle, having everyone tell her she has a lavish lifestyle and too much money.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:12
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:We make good money and I can see how you end up at these numbers:
Children - I know people think $500/month for 3 kids clothing is high, and I agree you can definitely do it cheaper with Target/Old Navy, but that's $160/month per kid. At Nordstrom, a girls dress can be $40-$50. Jeans- $30-$40. A pair of sneakers- $40-50. A winter coat- $50-80. No, my kid doesn't need new shoes or a coat every month, but 4-5 pieces of clothing/shoes can add up quickly. I regularly go through the kids clothing and discard stained/ripped/worn clothes and replace them- 4-5 items a month is a lot, but not ridiculous.
Food and Dining - I would bet the $2k on groceries includes a lot of pre-prepared foods. I usually grocery shop on Tuesdays and pick up dinner from the Whole Foods prepared options that night. One Whole Foods prepared dinner for 5 people can be $50. Do that a few nights a week, plus other food, and it adds up quickly.
Home and Property- $300/week for a housekeeper does seem high, but if she does two 8 hour days, that's $18.75/hour, which seems in line with the market.
Shopping - $2500 does seem like a lot without a more detailed breakdown, but heck, if a weekly trip to Target is $100-$150 per shot (paper towels, laundry detergent, pharmacy supplies, poster board and markers for a school project, and yes, a few ridiculous things that seemed like a good idea at the time) that's $400-600/month right there.
Add in a medium size household purchase or two (maybe you only buy a vacuum every 5 years, but there's always something breaking/looking worn out- a new iPad or iPhone, blenders, frying pans, toasters, deck chairs, storm doors, dishwashers, etc)- say $300-500/month.
For adult clothes- a sweater or dress from a nice brand at Nordstrom, plus tailoring- $300. A pair of leggings at Lululemon- $90. DH tends to shop twice a year, but spend $2-3k a shot (nice suit, a couple of new dress shirts, maybe a new pair of shoes), so say that averages $400/month.
So right there, I'm up to $1500-1900 a month, and it doesn't feel like excessive overconsumption. Yes, we could buy "lower quality" stuff (and yes, I recognize that sometimes we are just paying for the recognizable brand name), and yes, I could make do with less, but I'm not buying bags and bags of clothing a month.
Holy storm door....how many iPads and frying pans and toasters are you all destroying every month? It sounds like you barely use the kitchen so what are you doing with that toaster anyway?
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:08
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
See, the cool thing about having a high income like OP (and me) is you don't have to do time-consuming, low return stuff like clip coupons, have a 150/mo entertainment budget, or constantly haggle with service providers to save a few bucks a month on cable. Time is more valuable than that, especially when there's so much obvious fluff in the budget if OP really wants to cut back. Instead of wasting time on coupons, you get to come be snarky on DCUM.
IDK. It seems very odd. What itch is this thread scratching?
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:06
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
We make good money and I can see how you end up at these numbers:
Children - I know people think $500/month for 3 kids clothing is high, and I agree you can definitely do it cheaper with Target/Old Navy, but that's $160/month per kid. At Nordstrom, a girls dress can be $40-$50. Jeans- $30-$40. A pair of sneakers- $40-50. A winter coat- $50-80. No, my kid doesn't need new shoes or a coat every month, but 4-5 pieces of clothing/shoes can add up quickly. I regularly go through the kids clothing and discard stained/ripped/worn clothes and replace them- 4-5 items a month is a lot, but not ridiculous.
Food and Dining - I would bet the $2k on groceries includes a lot of pre-prepared foods. I usually grocery shop on Tuesdays and pick up dinner from the Whole Foods prepared options that night. One Whole Foods prepared dinner for 5 people can be $50. Do that a few nights a week, plus other food, and it adds up quickly.
Home and Property- $300/week for a housekeeper does seem high, but if she does two 8 hour days, that's $18.75/hour, which seems in line with the market.
Shopping - $2500 does seem like a lot without a more detailed breakdown, but heck, if a weekly trip to Target is $100-$150 per shot (paper towels, laundry detergent, pharmacy supplies, poster board and markers for a school project, and yes, a few ridiculous things that seemed like a good idea at the time) that's $400-600/month right there.
Add in a medium size household purchase or two (maybe you only buy a vacuum every 5 years, but there's always something breaking/looking worn out- a new iPad or iPhone, blenders, frying pans, toasters, deck chairs, storm doors, dishwashers, etc)- say $300-500/month.
For adult clothes- a sweater or dress from a nice brand at Nordstrom, plus tailoring- $300. A pair of leggings at Lululemon- $90. DH tends to shop twice a year, but spend $2-3k a shot (nice suit, a couple of new dress shirts, maybe a new pair of shoes), so say that averages $400/month.
So right there, I'm up to $1500-1900 a month, and it doesn't feel like excessive overconsumption. Yes, we could buy "lower quality" stuff (and yes, I recognize that sometimes we are just paying for the recognizable brand name), and yes, I could make do with less, but I'm not buying bags and bags of clothing a month.
Children - I know people think $500/month for 3 kids clothing is high, and I agree you can definitely do it cheaper with Target/Old Navy, but that's $160/month per kid. At Nordstrom, a girls dress can be $40-$50. Jeans- $30-$40. A pair of sneakers- $40-50. A winter coat- $50-80. No, my kid doesn't need new shoes or a coat every month, but 4-5 pieces of clothing/shoes can add up quickly. I regularly go through the kids clothing and discard stained/ripped/worn clothes and replace them- 4-5 items a month is a lot, but not ridiculous.
Food and Dining - I would bet the $2k on groceries includes a lot of pre-prepared foods. I usually grocery shop on Tuesdays and pick up dinner from the Whole Foods prepared options that night. One Whole Foods prepared dinner for 5 people can be $50. Do that a few nights a week, plus other food, and it adds up quickly.
Home and Property- $300/week for a housekeeper does seem high, but if she does two 8 hour days, that's $18.75/hour, which seems in line with the market.
Shopping - $2500 does seem like a lot without a more detailed breakdown, but heck, if a weekly trip to Target is $100-$150 per shot (paper towels, laundry detergent, pharmacy supplies, poster board and markers for a school project, and yes, a few ridiculous things that seemed like a good idea at the time) that's $400-600/month right there.
Add in a medium size household purchase or two (maybe you only buy a vacuum every 5 years, but there's always something breaking/looking worn out- a new iPad or iPhone, blenders, frying pans, toasters, deck chairs, storm doors, dishwashers, etc)- say $300-500/month.
For adult clothes- a sweater or dress from a nice brand at Nordstrom, plus tailoring- $300. A pair of leggings at Lululemon- $90. DH tends to shop twice a year, but spend $2-3k a shot (nice suit, a couple of new dress shirts, maybe a new pair of shoes), so say that averages $400/month.
So right there, I'm up to $1500-1900 a month, and it doesn't feel like excessive overconsumption. Yes, we could buy "lower quality" stuff (and yes, I recognize that sometimes we are just paying for the recognizable brand name), and yes, I could make do with less, but I'm not buying bags and bags of clothing a month.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:05
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Op here. Thanks to those with helpful replies!
It’s clear that my indulgence is clothing (I have a lot but not as much as you’d think, I just buy high end) and my DHs is food. I might try, just as an exercise, reigning in our spending in those categories, as well as in general “stuff”, just to see where that gets us / confirm that we still know how.
We spend a lot but we save a lot too and as another PP suggested might be the case, my DH has considerable life and disability insurance from work.
It sounds like spending 12-15K a month is not out of the ordinary for those with very high incomes and we might just be a little loose with the spending in certain categories.
It is, as someone suggested, an existential question more than a practical one about how much is too much.
I appreciate the replies and appreciate especially hearing from those with similar spending!
It’s clear that my indulgence is clothing (I have a lot but not as much as you’d think, I just buy high end) and my DHs is food. I might try, just as an exercise, reigning in our spending in those categories, as well as in general “stuff”, just to see where that gets us / confirm that we still know how.
We spend a lot but we save a lot too and as another PP suggested might be the case, my DH has considerable life and disability insurance from work.
It sounds like spending 12-15K a month is not out of the ordinary for those with very high incomes and we might just be a little loose with the spending in certain categories.
It is, as someone suggested, an existential question more than a practical one about how much is too much.
I appreciate the replies and appreciate especially hearing from those with similar spending!
Anonymous
04/02/2021 16:01
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:another humble bragging thread?
That’s what I thought, too. “Dear DCUM, I burn at least 10K per month in my custom backyard fire pit hand built by Icelandic Elves with bespoke stones quarried by Italian children of aristocratic descent... we can afford it, of course, but does it seem like an unusually high amount?”
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:59
Subject: Re:We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My 2 cents - personal care is low; my highlights are $300/month add botox, fillers, skincare etc. Clothes $ super high; food about right. House cleaning about right. Cars high but I HATE spending $ on cars and cars in general.
I had the same thought. They spend a lot on clothing but very little relative to that on personal care. Me, I'd rather wear cheap clothes but have an expensive face and hair lol.
Good Lord why?
To look good, of course.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:57
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
See, the cool thing about having a high income like OP (and me) is you don't have to do time-consuming, low return stuff like clip coupons, have a 150/mo entertainment budget, or constantly haggle with service providers to save a few bucks a month on cable. Time is more valuable than that, especially when there's so much obvious fluff in the budget if OP really wants to cut back. Instead of wasting time on coupons, you get to come be snarky on DCUM.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:56
Subject: Re:We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
The clothes budgets immediately jumped out at me. Bonkers.
I live a nice lifestyle and don’t come close to spending that. Spending that on kids clothes is just bad judgment. Why?
I live a nice lifestyle and don’t come close to spending that. Spending that on kids clothes is just bad judgment. Why?
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:52
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
This is silly advice. OP isn’t broke, just wondering if her spending is way out of whack. If OP uses the Peloton for exercise, then that spending is serving a good purpose and there’s no reason to cut it. And why should OP spend hours of time hunting for virtual coupons if shes not struggling financially? Not everyone aspires to an austerity budget for the self-perceived virtue of it.
0P knows exactly why the spending is what it is...it was all written down in detail. What is this about? OP wants to have the same budget as some random poster on DCUM? Why?
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:49
Subject: Re:We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My 2 cents - personal care is low; my highlights are $300/month add botox, fillers, skincare etc. Clothes $ super high; food about right. House cleaning about right. Cars high but I HATE spending $ on cars and cars in general.
I had the same thought. They spend a lot on clothing but very little relative to that on personal care. Me, I'd rather wear cheap clothes but have an expensive face and hair lol.
Good Lord why?
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:49
Subject: We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.
Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.
Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.
Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.
Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.
I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.
This is silly advice. OP isn’t broke, just wondering if her spending is way out of whack. If OP uses the Peloton for exercise, then that spending is serving a good purpose and there’s no reason to cut it. And why should OP spend hours of time hunting for virtual coupons if shes not struggling financially? Not everyone aspires to an austerity budget for the self-perceived virtue of it.
Anonymous
04/02/2021 15:48
Subject: Re:We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My 2 cents - personal care is low; my highlights are $300/month add botox, fillers, skincare etc. Clothes $ super high; food about right. House cleaning about right. Cars high but I HATE spending $ on cars and cars in general.
I had the same thought. They spend a lot on clothing but very little relative to that on personal care. Me, I'd rather wear cheap clothes but have an expensive face and hair lol.