Anonymous wrote:I'm just completely baffled - HOW good does a nanny have to be at her job, in order to all of the following be worth it: 1. have family of 3 or 5 people live in your basement, including an unemployed adult and a baby, 2. spend resources to help nanny's husband and children immigrate to US, 3. nanny obviously had to cut back a bit before and after giving birth.

Also curious about the nanny's husband's mentality who allegedly has much better life here - unemployed for years (based on kids' attending both HS and college in US), living in another family's basement, just so that the wife can be someone's nanny.

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Anonymous wrote:My husband is traveling and won’t be home until Friday. I also just started a new job in January and my main project (since I started) is due on Monday. This is suck bad timing for me

So you find a backup nanny on Nextdoor or through White House Nannies or pull a favor from a friend or you let the nanny bring her mom. Life happens and the nanny is not your personal slave.

This is so offensive. Nanny is part of the family. We helped her and her family in so many ways. We brought her whole family (husband and kids) to the uS. Gave them all a place to live, helped with college applications, fees, etc. You have no clue

Oooooh, so you have a slave nanny.

Stop responding to the “slave” troll. She says this all the time and the rest of us ignore her.

This was the first time I've ever said it, and if you read what OP did -- brought her nanny with her from overseas, then brought her husband and children, has them live with her, etc., and if you know people who are expats that have done this, or if you know people who have had nannies overseas and seen how they are treated, then you would know why I posted it. But if you don't, then carry on,

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Nanny thinks her mom should stay at the hospital and then go to a rehab facility where there are nurses, physical therapists, machines, etc., but she won’t go against her sisters desires.

OP, you should not allow nanny's mom to come to live with you in this case. You can be the big meanie here, and she can tell her sisters that her boss will not allow it. You take the blame.

That’s what I suggested, but the sisters want their dad to take care of the mom then (and my nanny thinks she can care for her mom better). I fear whether my husband and I could be liable if something were to happen to the mom too. Since the visa of our nanny is issued through my husband work, I worry he could get fired if we break the rules... I am not sure we would be breaking any rule, but it feels like a lot of responsibility to have someone so sick and frail in our home... maybe I am just being too anxious and she will not be released from the hospital if too sick (though she was being released today... nanny went to pick her up and doctors changed their mind at the last minute).

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is traveling and won’t be home until Friday. I also just started a new job in January and my main project (since I started) is due on Monday. This is suck bad timing for me

So you find a backup nanny on Nextdoor or through White House Nannies or pull a favor from a friend or you let the nanny bring her mom. Life happens and the nanny is not your personal slave.

This is so offensive. Nanny is part of the family. We helped her and her family in so many ways. We brought her whole family (husband and kids) to the uS. Gave them all a place to live, helped with college applications, fees, etc. You have no clue

Oooooh, so you have a slave nanny.

Stop responding to the “slave” troll. She says this all the time and the rest of us ignore her.

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Anonymous wrote:OP here. Nanny’s mom ended up staying at the hospital because apparently she had a stroke and none realized it until a nurse (who speak their language) realized that the mom cannot be released yet. Also, doctors recommended a rehabilitation facility because mom needs to learn how to walk and be self sufficient (she was perfectly healthy and normal before Covid).

Apparently nanny’s sisters disagree with the doctor and want my nanny and her husband to take care of mom instead. It’s a really bad situation. I also just found out that of the 4 guests of the nursing home, 3 died in a matter of days from each other, but apparently it was not Covid. The only one that was spared lived on a different floor.

Nanny thinks her mom should stay at the hospital and then go to a rehab facility where there are nurses, physical therapists, machines, etc., but she won’t go against her sisters desires.

Now I worry that when mom is discharged, she will come and stay with us and she won’t get the care she needs and will never recover... I worry that she might die and then we will all be responsible. As of now, she can’t walk, talk, or use the restroom on her own. My nanny is crying and I don’t know what to do or what to say.

My nanny says her mom is abandoned in the hospital and nobody is fighting for her... I can’t believe doctors wanted to release her in this condition...

This sounds beyond stressful, OP. Once mom is discharged from tho hospital, the hospital will no longer be involved. Someone from the family should ask for a social worker from the hospital to discuss short and long range discharge plans and to make sure that she gets admitted to a real rehab hospital. (Real meaning something closer to NRH vs a private assisted living facility that offers rehab). The family should NOT agree to any discharge until they are comfortable with the specific discharge plans, and a hospital social worker can help them understand the various options.
I’m assuming that mom’s next of kin for decision making purposes would be her husband. I hope that he is also involved. The family is also entitled to translators within the hospital if they need them.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Nanny’s mom ended up staying at the hospital because apparently she had a stroke and none realized it until a nurse (who speak their language) realized that the mom cannot be released yet. Also, doctors recommended a rehabilitation facility because mom needs to learn how to walk and be self sufficient (she was perfectly healthy and normal before Covid).

Apparently nanny’s sisters disagree with the doctor and want my nanny and her husband to take care of mom instead. It’s a really bad situation. I also just found out that of the 4 guests of the nursing home, 3 died in a matter of days from each other, but apparently it was not Covid. The only one that was spared lived on a different floor.

Nanny thinks her mom should stay at the hospital and then go to a rehab facility where there are nurses, physical therapists, machines, etc., but she won’t go against her sisters desires.

Now I worry that when mom is discharged, she will come and stay with us and she won’t get the care she needs and will never recover... I worry that she might die and then we will all be responsible. As of now, she can’t walk, talk, or use the restroom on her own. My nanny is crying and I don’t know what to do or what to say.

My nanny says her mom is abandoned in the hospital and nobody is fighting for her... I can’t believe doctors wanted to release her in this condition...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Nanny thinks her mom should stay at the hospital and then go to a rehab facility where there are nurses, physical therapists, machines, etc., but she won’t go against her sisters desires.

OP, you should not allow nanny's mom to come to live with you in this case. You can be the big meanie here, and she can tell her sisters that her boss will not allow it. You take the blame.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is traveling and won’t be home until Friday. I also just started a new job in January and my main project (since I started) is due on Monday. This is suck bad timing for me

So you find a backup nanny on Nextdoor or through White House Nannies or pull a favor from a friend or you let the nanny bring her mom. Life happens and the nanny is not your personal slave.

This is so offensive. Nanny is part of the family. We helped her and her family in so many ways. We brought her whole family (husband and kids) to the uS. Gave them all a place to live, helped with college applications, fees, etc. You have no clue

Oooooh, so you have a slave nanny.

Anonymous wrote:

Nanny thinks her mom should stay at the hospital and then go to a rehab facility where there are nurses, physical therapists, machines, etc., but she won’t go against her sisters desires.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is traveling and won’t be home until Friday. I also just started a new job in January and my main project (since I started) is due on Monday. This is suck bad timing for me

So you find a backup nanny on Nextdoor or through White House Nannies or pull a favor from a friend or you let the nanny bring her mom. Life happens and the nanny is not your personal slave.

This is so offensive. Nanny is part of the family. We helped her and her family in so many ways. We brought her whole family (husband and kids) to the uS. Gave them all a place to live, helped with college applications, fees, etc. You have no clue

Oooooh, so you have a slave nanny.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is traveling and won’t be home until Friday. I also just started a new job in January and my main project (since I started) is due on Monday. This is suck bad timing for me

So you find a backup nanny on Nextdoor or through White House Nannies or pull a favor from a friend or you let the nanny bring her mom. Life happens and the nanny is not your personal slave.

This is so offensive. Nanny is part of the family. We helped her and her family in so many ways. We brought her whole family (husband and kids) to the uS. Gave them all a place to live, helped with college applications, fees, etc. You have no clue