Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:57     Subject: Re:How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you can ask her to wear a uniform but you have to provide it. And be prepared for her to say no and find another cleaning lady.



This seems kind of extreme. I think OP just wants her to wear a t-shirt and jeans.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:46     Subject: Re:How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
OP, I think you can ask her to wear a uniform but you have to provide it. And be prepared for her to say no and find another cleaning lady.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:45     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


Why do people keep saying that OP is the employer? It sounds like this is a cleaning lady, not a full-time housekeeper. So OP is not the employer.


Ok. OP is the client. It’s still a reasonable request.


Would it be reasonable for your employer to ask you to start wearing a headscarf to work, now that they've been bought by a Saudi conglomerate? After all, it's part of their religion.


I’m a therapist and own my own practice. It would be reasonable for a client to tell me that they would prefer that I wear a headscarf while I am with them. And it would also be completely reasonable for me to say that I am not comfortable with that and to work it out or refer them elsewhere.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:41     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
You can certainly ask, but I would phrase it very politely, and be prepared for her to decline and to have to find another cleaning lady.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:38     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


Why do people keep saying that OP is the employer? It sounds like this is a cleaning lady, not a full-time housekeeper. So OP is not the employer.


Ok. OP is the client. It’s still a reasonable request.


Would it be reasonable for your employer to ask you to start wearing a headscarf to work, now that they've been bought by a Saudi conglomerate? After all, it's part of their religion.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:35     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm really not trying to body shame. For example, I don't care if someone is wearing a two piece bikini at the pool. But its a little weird for someone to wear something you would wear to the club while cleaning a house. I'm not talking about her wearing yoga pants and sleeveless tops, I'm talking about leather pants and such.


How are leather pants more revealing than yoga pants?


Real leather pants are over $400. They're not leather pants, for pete's sake.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:34     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


Why do people keep saying that OP is the employer? It sounds like this is a cleaning lady, not a full-time housekeeper. So OP is not the employer.


Because mediocre people like to shriek "I pay your salary" whenever someone says "no" to them.

Unpopular opinion: "the customer is always right" culture has really damaged a lot of people.


No one is shrieking, and no one has said “no.” Most posters are saying that the OP is out of bounds to say anything at all, that she should be a good little woman, clean her home herself, keep silent, and suck it up. If she expresses an opinion, she might accidentally offend someone!
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:31     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:For example, a cross between these two things, both marketed as workout wear by Old Navy:

https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=646824122&vid=1&tid=onpl000017&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIg9fDjcGC7gIVxqeGCh1ngwkfEAQYAiABEgKlcfD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=552837112&vid=2&tid=onpl000028&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIje7ew8GC7gIVpeiGCh0nDANYEAQYASABEgI59vD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content


OT, but so cute! Thanks, I just ordered some.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:28     Subject: Re:How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
And this is why people hate on religious people. You want everyone to conform to you.

Fire her or deal with how she dresses. Low cut with yoga pants vs midriff tops and daisy dukes. The latter seem a little out of place, the former are comfortable to clean in.

You could always provide a uniform and let her know ahead of time if she wants to decline and give 2 weeks but you will need to make all "help" wear such a uniform.

Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:25     Subject: Re:How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Sexism.

You would never ask a man to change his clothes. If a plumber came to unclog your toilet you would not ask him to wear a non-offensive t-shirt.

Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:24     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Can I request that my cleaning lady wear more revealing clothing? See how insane that sounds?
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:23     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


Why do people keep saying that OP is the employer? It sounds like this is a cleaning lady, not a full-time housekeeper. So OP is not the employer.


Because mediocre people like to shriek "I pay your salary" whenever someone says "no" to them.

Unpopular opinion: "the customer is always right" culture has really damaged a lot of people.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:23     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


Why do people keep saying that OP is the employer? It sounds like this is a cleaning lady, not a full-time housekeeper. So OP is not the employer.


Ok. OP is the client. It’s still a reasonable request.


No it's really not. She's scrubbing your toilet, not teaching your child morality. Jesus.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:22     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Anonymous wrote:On one hand, you are the employer, so it seems like your employee should abide by your comfort zone (as long as it is legal). BUT, what if you wanted her to wear a veil in your home, that would be going too far in my opinion.

How about your hire a cleaning person through an agency (which usually protects them and you more anyway, in terms of benefits/being bonded, etc). When you first put in the request, explain that due to your cultural/religious beliefs/customs, you would appreciate it if the person they send does not wear X, Y, Z (don't label it as modest, be specific, since "modest" is subjective). That way you are describing a work requirement, not insulting an individual.


AGAIN OP IS NOT AN EMPLOYER.

You Bs need to get over yourself.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2021 11:19     Subject: How can I request cleaning help wear something more... modest?
Those faux leather leggings might be her nicer leggings. She might be trying to look better for clients while also being comfortable cleaning up after you.

If you can't stand the sight of someone who doesn't conform to your style of dress, fire her and do it yourself. Or, call around to the different companies and see if anyone is willing to entertain your style.