Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.

Reviving this thread because I am having this exact issue right now with my almost 14 year old. I'm not going to go as far as came out as transgender because that happened much later in the conversation. She wants to get a chest binder with the reason being she is uncomfortable with her body. I am not surprised the subject has come up. As others have noted, this seems to be a huge topic for this age group. It's certainly not the first time we've heard her mention LGBTQ issues/topics.

I offered support - not for a chest binder, but in general. I told her I'd compromise and get her sports bras, but that I thought the chest binder is a step forward on a path that I'm not convinced we've fully explored whether she should be on. She has a therapist - she tends towards anxiety, and IMO, depression. I admitted that I don't have direct experience with this and we could talk to her therapist and pediatrician.

Look, in the end if she is actually transgender, non-binary, gay, or straight we will support her.

But I don't see this as a fully formed decision and this particular request strikes me as along the lines of exactly what the PP said - " For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty." That is what I heard in what she said.

Looking for resources to deal with this even-handedly and objectively so that she feels heard but also so we are dealing with her real issues. Thanks.

Genderspectrum.org is a great resource for families of transgender people.

https://www.translanguageprimer.org/primer Is a great place to read up on language relating to this topic.

OP, my DS is trans. Even if it’s not a complete surprise, it can still be a shock to hear them say the words. Good for you for being accepting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.

Biological sex is not even just male/female in humans. You know that right? Have you read about intersex? If biology is biology to you then you need read more because your basic information is very incomplete. Gender is a different thing altogether. You are talking about defying any sense of logic but that is because don't have a foundation of facts - only things you think you know that are wrong.

Intersex conditions are a disorder of sexual development. There are children born with one leg, or some other deviation from the standard 2. That doesn't change that humans are bipedal. Disorders happen.

For what it's worth, advocates for people with intersex conditions have been pretty clear on their desire not to be used as a bludgeon for transgender activism. People with intersex conditions have a lot of stuff they have to deal with and deserve to have their own voices heard.

Again, you are looking too narrowly and missing so much by doing so. Gender is its own thing but you are basing your contempt on biological "facts" that are not facts.

I didn't speak to gender at all.

I responded to your comment, which used intersex conditions for transgender activism. If you want to make life better for intersex people, then listen to them and raise their voices about their situations. Don't co-opt them because you think they provide cover. Intersex conditions are different from transgender conditions. Please respect people with intersex conditions, especially if you want people to respect people with transgender identities. That is an area where there is common ground, and doesn't require you putting on anyone else's struggle in order to make your voice seem louder. Using people with intersex conditions is not a good look for the transgender community.

Gender nor sex are binary. Sex is influenced by genitalia, reproductive organs, hormones, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.

Biological sex is not even just male/female in humans. You know that right? Have you read about intersex? If biology is biology to you then you need read more because your basic information is very incomplete. Gender is a different thing altogether. You are talking about defying any sense of logic but that is because don't have a foundation of facts - only things you think you know that are wrong.

Intersex conditions are a disorder of sexual development. There are children born with one leg, or some other deviation from the standard 2. That doesn't change that humans are bipedal. Disorders happen.

For what it's worth, advocates for people with intersex conditions have been pretty clear on their desire not to be used as a bludgeon for transgender activism. People with intersex conditions have a lot of stuff they have to deal with and deserve to have their own voices heard.

Again, you are looking too narrowly and missing so much by doing so. Gender is its own thing but you are basing your contempt on biological "facts" that are not facts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.

Biological sex is not even just male/female in humans. You know that right? Have you read about intersex? If biology is biology to you then you need read more because your basic information is very incomplete. Gender is a different thing altogether. You are talking about defying any sense of logic but that is because don't have a foundation of facts - only things you think you know that are wrong.

Intersex conditions are a disorder of sexual development. There are children born with one leg, or some other deviation from the standard 2. That doesn't change that humans are bipedal. Disorders happen.

For what it's worth, advocates for people with intersex conditions have been pretty clear on their desire not to be used as a bludgeon for transgender activism. People with intersex conditions have a lot of stuff they have to deal with and deserve to have their own voices heard.

I hope you can be supportive of your son.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.

Where exactly did you get your degree in psychology again?

I don't need a psychology degree to use basic logic. I dare to say that many in the medical community think that psychology isn't science at all. These are all excuses to make people feel like rejecting your gender is normal. Come on, we all know "scientific" conclusions can be determined to reach a certain outcome. Happens everyday...

I dare say that a large portion of my patients are MDs, their spouses, and children.

Stop proclaiming things that you know nothing about or at least state: it is my opinion that...

And no, contrary to your belief, scientific conclusions are not just made willy-nilly to fit a scientist's narrative. Do you have any idea how many hours of research and testing goes into proving or disproving a hypothesis?

Sure. One that the funder of the study does or does not want to see.

Yes, that's why we still live in caves and medicine focuses on rectifying the humors, bleeding and fairground patent medicines.

Oh, wait, that's not actually true. We have modern medicine, vaccinations, skyscrapers and all kinds of other good stuff because science works. It's not about "who funded the study."

But clearly education in this country isn't going as well.

NP
not always.
a quick search on google or pubmed will show you many cases of data fraud in scientific research.
Don't forget our latest example, the opioid crisis reached the level that it did thanks to medical professionals being sold on 'scientific data'.

Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.

Biological sex is not even just male/female in humans. You know that right? Have you read about intersex? If biology is biology to you then you need read more because your basic information is very incomplete. Gender is a different thing altogether. You are talking about defying any sense of logic but that is because don't have a foundation of facts - only things you think you know that are wrong.

Anonymous wrote:You parents are sick and so not informed. It isn’t a trend.

It is a trend. I know of kids who have come out and on the other side of it. Lots of kids calling out for help this way. They are not getting the support they need at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.

I agree. Some people are very quick to jump on the transgender bandwagon because they see something virtuous and woke in it, but it's only damaging. Odds are the daughter is just using it as an excuse to seek attention or address some internal frustration.

I would suggest the best approach is to simply back out and see how it plays out. If the daughter genuinely thinks she is transgender it will manifest itself in other ways rather than just declaring herself a transgender. "Real" transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition. If she doesn't do anything beyond calling herself a transgender, then she's just seeking attention for other reasons and it will fade away in due time.

Uhhh, WTF?
Closed minded much?
Did you really just say that transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition??

You do know that neurosis is by definition a mental illness, correct??

God, you narrow minded, small people are what's wrong with the world today.

Science and medical issues, my friend, have nothing to do with whether or not one is "closed minded."

No, but your ignorance of both has a lot to do with your close mindedness. Several physicians on this thread have already explained to you that you totally misunderstand the medical terms that you are trying to use, and to the extent that you believe that gender or even biological sex are binary, you don't know much about science.

Big difference in medical and science research that involves biology, chemistry, anatomy and other real sciences. Psychology, which purports to study things like “gender,” as you nite here, is completely different and a joke in comparison

Could not agree more. Anyone coming on to this website claiming that psychology is like psychiatry or other hard sciences is a joke. I can even tell by the language PP uses that he/she is a transgender advocate and assumes people on this site affirming their close-mindedness are "physicians" giving medical advice.

So, where are the links to studies showing that the wave of transgenderism is not a medical/psychiatric condition?

Or, almost worse, a desperate cry for help and/or attention by deeply troubled kids whose parents, schools, physicians and other authority figures are too out of touch with reality to help them.

This!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.

I agree. Some people are very quick to jump on the transgender bandwagon because they see something virtuous and woke in it, but it's only damaging. Odds are the daughter is just using it as an excuse to seek attention or address some internal frustration.

I would suggest the best approach is to simply back out and see how it plays out. If the daughter genuinely thinks she is transgender it will manifest itself in other ways rather than just declaring herself a transgender. "Real" transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition. If she doesn't do anything beyond calling herself a transgender, then she's just seeking attention for other reasons and it will fade away in due time.

Uhhh, WTF?
Closed minded much?
Did you really just say that transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition??

You do know that neurosis is by definition a mental illness, correct??

God, you narrow minded, small people are what's wrong with the world today.

Science and medical issues, my friend, have nothing to do with whether or not one is "closed minded."

No, but your ignorance of both has a lot to do with your close mindedness. Several physicians on this thread have already explained to you that you totally misunderstand the medical terms that you are trying to use, and to the extent that you believe that gender or even biological sex are binary, you don't know much about science.

Big difference in medical and science research that involves biology, chemistry, anatomy and other real sciences. Psychology, which purports to study things like “gender,” as you nite here, is completely different and a joke in comparison

Could not agree more. Anyone coming on to this website claiming that psychology is like psychiatry or other hard sciences is a joke. I can even tell by the language PP uses that he/she is a transgender advocate and assumes people on this site affirming their close-mindedness are "physicians" giving medical advice.

So, where are the links to studies showing that the wave of transgenderism is not a medical/psychiatric condition?

Or, almost worse, a desperate cry for help and/or attention by deeply troubled kids whose parents, schools, physicians and other authority figures are too out of touch with reality to help them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.

I agree. Some people are very quick to jump on the transgender bandwagon because they see something virtuous and woke in it, but it's only damaging. Odds are the daughter is just using it as an excuse to seek attention or address some internal frustration.

I would suggest the best approach is to simply back out and see how it plays out. If the daughter genuinely thinks she is transgender it will manifest itself in other ways rather than just declaring herself a transgender. "Real" transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition. If she doesn't do anything beyond calling herself a transgender, then she's just seeking attention for other reasons and it will fade away in due time.

Uhhh, WTF?
Closed minded much?
Did you really just say that transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition??

You do know that neurosis is by definition a mental illness, correct??

God, you narrow minded, small people are what's wrong with the world today.

Science and medical issues, my friend, have nothing to do with whether or not one is "closed minded."

No, but your ignorance of both has a lot to do with your close mindedness. Several physicians on this thread have already explained to you that you totally misunderstand the medical terms that you are trying to use, and to the extent that you believe that gender or even biological sex are binary, you don't know much about science.

Big difference in medical and science research that involves biology, chemistry, anatomy and other real sciences. Psychology, which purports to study things like “gender,” as you nite here, is completely different and a joke in comparison

Could not agree more. Anyone coming on to this website claiming that psychology is like psychiatry or other hard sciences is a joke. I can even tell by the language PP uses that he/she is a transgender advocate and assumes people on this site affirming their close-mindedness are "physicians" giving medical advice.

So, where are the links to studies showing that the wave of transgenderism is not a medical/psychiatric condition?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.

I agree. Some people are very quick to jump on the transgender bandwagon because they see something virtuous and woke in it, but it's only damaging. Odds are the daughter is just using it as an excuse to seek attention or address some internal frustration.

I would suggest the best approach is to simply back out and see how it plays out. If the daughter genuinely thinks she is transgender it will manifest itself in other ways rather than just declaring herself a transgender. "Real" transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition. If she doesn't do anything beyond calling herself a transgender, then she's just seeking attention for other reasons and it will fade away in due time.

Uhhh, WTF?
Closed minded much?
Did you really just say that transgenderism is a serious neurosis condition??

You do know that neurosis is by definition a mental illness, correct??

God, you narrow minded, small people are what's wrong with the world today.

Science and medical issues, my friend, have nothing to do with whether or not one is "closed minded."

No, but your ignorance of both has a lot to do with your close mindedness. Several physicians on this thread have already explained to you that you totally misunderstand the medical terms that you are trying to use, and to the extent that you believe that gender or even biological sex are binary, you don't know much about science.

Big difference in medical and science research that involves biology, chemistry, anatomy and other real sciences. Psychology, which purports to study things like “gender,” as you nite here, is completely different and a joke in comparison

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:ROGD theory is absolute garbage.

Except that it's happening more and more, now that being transgendered is acceptable in some circles.

It is the hipster thing in high school and colleges.