I think I understand why one pp is going off on OP. I think we can all agree that many adults that are trying to lose weight should not eat 10 bananas a day. However, restricting your elementary age child's intake of fruits because of some fad diet you are observing or that you read about online is not something most people would do. I am guessing OP did this as she thought fruit was contributing to her dd's weight gain, and that her intention was good, but misplaced and may have caused more trouble. All that fiber in fruits and veggies is good for our gut, so Dr. really did the right thing by saying what was the right way to eat in front of OP's dd who now realized that she can eat a lot of food that is healthy and was not "forbidden" from eating fruit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is probably the most helpful and common-sense post I’ve ever seen about childhood obesity. I come from a family of eating disorder sufferers and your post doesn’t have that tone to me at all. Hope the backlash you’re getting isn’t stinging too bad. OPs get attacked on virtually any topic on this site for some reason. Best wishes to you and your child. Great work.

Can you share a bit more regarding how long it took, how you explained it to your child, etc? This is such great info about a problem that is really common.

It took about 2 years to get outside the “obese” range. The goal was not for DD to lose weight, just to maintain while growing taller. As for telling DD, the MD didn’t pull us aside to discuss it. Basically everything in the OP, MD said in front of DD. So we have told her that the MD felt she wasn’t getting enough fruit and veg (and we still pull that out as needed, “remember Dr. Larlo said you need to eat all your veggies”). But always a focus on health. The sport part, I told her she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to, but does have to do something, again, because Dr. Larlo said she needs it for her health. And that was a difficult and expensive process. But now that she has her preferred sports it’s a breeze. She totally sees herself as an athlete and supplements at home without being prompted to (eg stretching or doing a yoga video). That’s also been naturally reinforcing. DD gets external praise for her athletic improvement so she wants to keep investing in it.

Honestly this still seems like an eating disorder in progress. Hopefully not, but keep an eye out for it.

To eat more fruits and veggies is an eating disorder? To move more? She is adopting a healthy lifestyle.

"adopting a healthy lifestyle" is fine. telling a girl child she is fat and needs to diet and exercise 1.5 hrs/day to stay societally acceptable is a recipe for an eating disorder and/or permanent obesity.

Nowhere did OP say anything about weight being about social acceptability. You are reading something into OP's posts that is not there. You are the one who is preoccupied with that, not OP or her daughter. I think you need to reread OP and your own posts with a fresh eye.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP—So what were the sports and activities that were a match for your kid?

I don’t want to say because they’re a little obscure and she’s getting very involved with them, but we tried a few before finding one that clicked (dance, swimming, gymnastics, ice and roller skating, tennis).

Would love other sports and activity ideas if anyone has them - not just from OP.

Rock climbing is a great one. Bring your kids out to that rock climbing place is laurel, MD. They will love it! Climbzone I think it is called.

Do they have a class? If not, it’s not a good fit. No one is going to start going to a drop in activity 3-4x a week.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP—So what were the sports and activities that were a match for your kid?

I don’t want to say because they’re a little obscure and she’s getting very involved with them, but we tried a few before finding one that clicked (dance, swimming, gymnastics, ice and roller skating, tennis).

Would love other sports and activity ideas if anyone has them - not just from OP.

I’ll give you some: field hockey, ice hockey, lacrosse, volleyball, crew, speed skating, martial arts, kickboxing, Tough Mudders

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP—So what were the sports and activities that were a match for your kid?

I don’t want to say because they’re a little obscure and she’s getting very involved with them, but we tried a few before finding one that clicked (dance, swimming, gymnastics, ice and roller skating, tennis).

Would love other sports and activity ideas if anyone has them - not just from OP.

Rock climbing is a great one. Bring your kids out to that rock climbing place is laurel, MD. They will love it! Climbzone I think it is called.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP—So what were the sports and activities that were a match for your kid?

I don’t want to say because they’re a little obscure and she’s getting very involved with them, but we tried a few before finding one that clicked (dance, swimming, gymnastics, ice and roller skating, tennis).

Would love other sports and activity ideas if anyone has them - not just from OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cured????

Your poor child.

OP took action to address her child's obesity. That's better than denial. Right?

No not really when she thinks she "cured" her child.

She's obsessed with how much her child weighs, how she looks to others. 90 minutes of exercise every day? Seriously something wrong with her thought process. Of course we all want our children at a healthy weight. Of course we all want our children to be healthy eaters. Who starts out thinking an apple or grape is bad? Sorry not buying her post as being healthy for her child. This will backfire later for sure.

No way is 90 minutes of exercise too much. It was not too long ago that kids had hours of exercise each day from riding their bikes all over town and also doing physical yard work
for their families and/or working on the farm.

Good job good post.

DS is 7 and plays a sport each season, he has an hour practice once a week. Yes, they are not running the entire time but there is a good amount of activity during those practices and the games. He does Ninja Warrior once a week because he loves it. He walks to school and plays at the park most days. Toss in PE and recess and he gets at least 90 minutes of exercise a day, if not more. There is an entire movement to get kids to play 60 minutes a day because the movement is great for their development and to decrease the chance of kids becoming obese. As kids get older, they are going to have more practices that are 1 hour or longer if they continue to play sports. If they are not playing something organized, they still need to find something that will keep them active and physically healthy.

I am a bit confused that people think that encouraging a kid to play something for an extended period of time in a day is a bad thing.

It sounds like the OP has taken a good approach to the issue. I don't see how following the doctors advice and being honest with the kid is problematic. I think as long as it is coached in the terms of being healthy and changing a lifestyle I think it is a fine change.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is probably the most helpful and common-sense post I’ve ever seen about childhood obesity. I come from a family of eating disorder sufferers and your post doesn’t have that tone to me at all. Hope the backlash you’re getting isn’t stinging too bad. OPs get attacked on virtually any topic on this site for some reason. Best wishes to you and your child. Great work.

Can you share a bit more regarding how long it took, how you explained it to your child, etc? This is such great info about a problem that is really common.

It took about 2 years to get outside the “obese” range. The goal was not for DD to lose weight, just to maintain while growing taller. As for telling DD, the MD didn’t pull us aside to discuss it. Basically everything in the OP, MD said in front of DD. So we have told her that the MD felt she wasn’t getting enough fruit and veg (and we still pull that out as needed, “remember Dr. Larlo said you need to eat all your veggies”). But always a focus on health. The sport part, I told her she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to, but does have to do something, again, because Dr. Larlo said she needs it for her health. And that was a difficult and expensive process. But now that she has her preferred sports it’s a breeze. She totally sees herself as an athlete and supplements at home without being prompted to (eg stretching or doing a yoga video). That’s also been naturally reinforcing. DD gets external praise for her athletic improvement so she wants to keep investing in it.

Honestly this still seems like an eating disorder in progress. Hopefully not, but keep an eye out for it.

Honestly, you sound crazy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is probably the most helpful and common-sense post I’ve ever seen about childhood obesity. I come from a family of eating disorder sufferers and your post doesn’t have that tone to me at all. Hope the backlash you’re getting isn’t stinging too bad. OPs get attacked on virtually any topic on this site for some reason. Best wishes to you and your child. Great work.

Can you share a bit more regarding how long it took, how you explained it to your child, etc? This is such great info about a problem that is really common.

I'm sorry she seriously lead with her infant sucked down every drop. Well, that's what some infants do. It's obviously she is the one with the disassociation to reality in terms of her child's eating habits. 90 minutes of exercise daily sure, wonderful and obsessive. Her description of apples or grapes prior to her discovering they are good foods?

This will not turn out well.

I mention that only because I think people assume parents do/don’t do something that “causes” a child to become obese (I probably thought that). There was no point where my child changed and started to gain weight more quickly. She always was the way she was.

Fine. The issue here is that you're turning something that sounds like her natural metabolism and body size into a "sickness." yes, it's good to eat more fruits and veggies, and good to get exercise, but those are good FOR THEIR OWN SAKES. not for reduction in BMI in a pre-teen girl (whose BMI may have naturally decreased anyway in a few years.) Dieting is HUGELY correlated to later obesity. OP needs to be extremely careful and wary of communicating to her DD that she is on a perpetual diet so her body can look acceptable. I'm a little shocked that she allowed the pediatrician to discuss her child's weight in front of her. I would never, ever allow this. A discussion of exercise and fruits and veg? Sure. But talking about weight negatively in front of a pre-teen girl is a recipe for eating disorders.

You sound like you have a lot of personal baggage. Maybe you need your own thread.

Anonymous wrote:Another question for OP- did you do anything to her diet other than up fruits and veggies? Don’t know why people are attacking that as “dieting...” Seems like a great approach.

The MD said that the only evidence based approach was to add (add fruit/veg, add activity) and that restricting backfires. I was honestly surprised she wasn’t saying, cut back on bread, switch to leaner meats, etc. But she was pretty clear. That said, adding that much produce was, without question, a big change, for her and the household in general. If you’re actually going to hit a goal of minimum 5 servings, you have to not only have fruit or veg with every meal, you have to make snacks include it too. I pack probably 3 servings of fruit/veg in her lunchbox (because she won’t eat them all).

The only disorder is the fat Americans and fat acceptance. STFU ,, stop with sugar and fats. Make America skinny again shame the fatties

Another question for OP- did you do anything to her diet other than up fruits and veggies? Don’t know why people are attacking that as “dieting...” Seems like a great approach.

OP said the daughter grew into her weight over a period of years. That does not sound like an eating disorder at all. That tends to involve rapid weight loss. Sounds like OP and the child’s daughter helped her slowly change her trajectory in a sustainable and non-restrictive way. Kudos!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is probably the most helpful and common-sense post I’ve ever seen about childhood obesity. I come from a family of eating disorder sufferers and your post doesn’t have that tone to me at all. Hope the backlash you’re getting isn’t stinging too bad. OPs get attacked on virtually any topic on this site for some reason. Best wishes to you and your child. Great work.

Can you share a bit more regarding how long it took, how you explained it to your child, etc? This is such great info about a problem that is really common.

It took about 2 years to get outside the “obese” range. The goal was not for DD to lose weight, just to maintain while growing taller. As for telling DD, the MD didn’t pull us aside to discuss it. Basically everything in the OP, MD said in front of DD. So we have told her that the MD felt she wasn’t getting enough fruit and veg (and we still pull that out as needed, “remember Dr. Larlo said you need to eat all your veggies”). But always a focus on health. The sport part, I told her she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to, but does have to do something, again, because Dr. Larlo said she needs it for her health. And that was a difficult and expensive process. But now that she has her preferred sports it’s a breeze. She totally sees herself as an athlete and supplements at home without being prompted to (eg stretching or doing a yoga video). That’s also been naturally reinforcing. DD gets external praise for her athletic improvement so she wants to keep investing in it.

Honestly this still seems like an eating disorder in progress. Hopefully not, but keep an eye out for it.

To eat more fruits and veggies is an eating disorder? To move more? She is adopting a healthy lifestyle.

"adopting a healthy lifestyle" is fine. telling a girl child she is fat and needs to diet and exercise 1.5 hrs/day to stay societally acceptable is a recipe for an eating disorder and/or permanent obesity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is probably the most helpful and common-sense post I’ve ever seen about childhood obesity. I come from a family of eating disorder sufferers and your post doesn’t have that tone to me at all. Hope the backlash you’re getting isn’t stinging too bad. OPs get attacked on virtually any topic on this site for some reason. Best wishes to you and your child. Great work.

Can you share a bit more regarding how long it took, how you explained it to your child, etc? This is such great info about a problem that is really common.

I'm sorry she seriously lead with her infant sucked down every drop. Well, that's what some infants do. It's obviously she is the one with the disassociation to reality in terms of her child's eating habits. 90 minutes of exercise daily sure, wonderful and obsessive. Her description of apples or grapes prior to her discovering they are good foods?

This will not turn out well.

I mention that only because I think people assume parents do/don’t do something that “causes” a child to become obese (I probably thought that). There was no point where my child changed and started to gain weight more quickly. She always was the way she was.

Fine. The issue here is that you're turning something that sounds like her natural metabolism and body size into a "sickness." yes, it's good to eat more fruits and veggies, and good to get exercise, but those are good FOR THEIR OWN SAKES. not for reduction in BMI in a pre-teen girl (whose BMI may have naturally decreased anyway in a few years.) Dieting is HUGELY correlated to later obesity. OP needs to be extremely careful and wary of communicating to her DD that she is on a perpetual diet so her body can look acceptable. I'm a little shocked that she allowed the pediatrician to discuss her child's weight in front of her. I would never, ever allow this. A discussion of exercise and fruits and veg? Sure. But talking about weight negatively in front of a pre-teen girl is a recipe for eating disorders.