Anonymous
Post 08/29/2012 15:40     Subject: Re:How to Convince my Husband to go for a third
This is not a power struggle that should ever be won by the person wanting the third kid. If it's the mom or dad, whoever doesn't want the child, you should go that way, in my opinion. The stress, money, time, if one doesn't want the extra, I think it's selfish to push the other one, your way, in this case, your Dh.

Your not deciding what movie to rent, I side heavily with the husband, here.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 20:55     Subject: Re:How to Convince my Husband to go for a third
Anonymous wrote:OP, as a thought exercise, what if birth control meant periodic abstinence?

I say this as someone who is open to life, and whose only recourse (under grave circumstances) would be FAM. One of the reasons FAM brings couples closer together is because it requires mutual sacrifice and lots of communication.

Sex means bonding and babies. What if you told your husband that you would respect his wishes, but hope he would respect yours. Since a baby can result from sex during a fertile time, you are no longer available during times of potential fertility. When he makes love to you, you want him to make love to ALL of you, which includes your natural, healthy fertility.

Your charting can help you learn a great deal about your body, and might make your husband appreciate how awesome sex really can be--your love for each other can lead to a new PERSON.

Babies are not possessions, acquisitions, trophies, playthings, pets, additions. They are unique, priceless persons, gifts. I hope you both grow closer together through this time.


+1

This is, by far, the best advice this woman received. OP, if you are still on DCUM after the thrashing you received two years ago for daring to want another child, I hope you are at peace. I kind of hope that you are not on DCUM anymore after reading so much of the advice you did receive.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 12:31     Subject: How to Convince my Husband to go for a third
Anonymous wrote:You know what would be helpful here? Is if anyone had advice, not criticisms, about how to deal with my desires, and the resulting disappointment and how to swallow my needs. No one has addressed that this is a real desire. Actually, two or three people have and I thank you. But for the other people that just think I should walk away, its not that simple. I need a way to deal with the disappointment and the fact that my husband closed the door, if that happens, without any debate. I'll need a way to not resent him for this and to not let it affect our marriage.


If this is really your problem, then you need to grow up. Seriously. "Disappointment," if that's all it is for you, is part of life. I am "disappointed" that I'm not anchoring the Today Show (a silly, life-long dream) but I'm not letting resentment at the people who are ruin my life.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 09:56     Subject: How to Convince my Husband to go for a third
Anonymous wrote:Some people just cannot stop, cannot be satisfied, this is sad...


Wanting a third child hardly qualifies as "cannot stop, cannot be satisfied".