Anonymous wrote:Outward austerity is def a WASP old money value. My rich aunts and uncles with their 20 yr old Mercedes and 10 yr old Burberry trenches also had 2-3 presents per child under the tree. As stated above, those gifts would also be quite expensive.

In contrast to my poorer relatives who wanted their kids to unwrap a few dozen presents but many of them from Dollar Tree.

Those are both extremes.

I grew up as a child of poor immigrants. I got one Christmas gift per year. We had no family in America so I didn’t get gifts from extended family. I would sometimes get a gift from church.

We now have a seven figure HHI and my kids get 3-4 gifts from their immediate family. Then their grandparents and uncles also give them 2-3 gifts each. Our tree is surrounded by a lot of presents for everyone.

My kids want for nothing and I don’t think they really know the difference between an expensive or inexpensive gift.

How we appear to others is the absolute last thing I am thinking about. I don’t think the ugg slippers I got for my MIL will be the first envy of anyone.

Outward austerity is def a WASP old money value. My rich aunts and uncles with their 20 yr old Mercedes and 10 yr old Burberry trenches also had 2-3 presents per child under the tree. As stated above, those gifts would also be quite expensive.

In contrast to my poorer relatives who wanted their kids to unwrap a few dozen presents but many of them from Dollar Tree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are growing up with so much more than I did. I don’t buy them much for Christmas as I think they already have so much. I am on a crusade to make sure my kids are not bratty even though they have pretty cushy lives.

Wouldn’t it make better sense to stop spoiling them year round rather than just on Christmas? And then trying to make middle class families feel bad for treating their children one day a year?

I don’t spoil them. That is the entire point. I don’t care what others do. Knock yourself out with a million presents.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For a teen boy $200 sneakers are not ridiculous! That’s what he wants! When we were teens those same shoes were popular gift items but back then they were more like $100.

I think people on this thread don't have teens yet. My teen ds is not in to tennis shoes but most of his friends are.

They're all different. One of mind has been very conscious of sneakers since he was in elementary school and the other still would prefer to wear the same sneakers until they fall off his feat. The one into sneakers is also the athletic one.

MINE
&
FEET

OMG

Yes, mine don't care about brand of shoes at all. But my teen's feet are adult sized so even just regular tennis shoes that fit him are well over $100. His fit of double wide so we can't pick them up at target or any discount stores.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For a teen boy $200 sneakers are not ridiculous! That’s what he wants! When we were teens those same shoes were popular gift items but back then they were more like $100.

I think people on this thread don't have teens yet. My teen ds is not in to tennis shoes but most of his friends are.

They're all different. One of mind has been very conscious of sneakers since he was in elementary school and the other still would prefer to wear the same sneakers until they fall off his feat. The one into sneakers is also the athletic one.

MINE
&
FEET

OMG

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For a teen boy $200 sneakers are not ridiculous! That’s what he wants! When we were teens those same shoes were popular gift items but back then they were more like $100.

I think people on this thread don't have teens yet. My teen ds is not in to tennis shoes but most of his friends are.

They're all different. One of mind has been very conscious of sneakers since he was in elementary school and the other still would prefer to wear the same sneakers until they fall off his feat. The one into sneakers is also the athletic one.

Anonymous wrote:I would never tell anyone how much we spend on gifts. Never.

My sense from my wealthier friends and family is they downplay it. “We don’t go overboard” followed by a very short list of expensive things.

This is what I have seen. Fewer things but they are very expensive. American girl dolls and the furniture and accessories, ipods, ipads, etc.

Anonymous wrote:For a teen boy $200 sneakers are not ridiculous! That’s what he wants! When we were teens those same shoes were popular gift items but back then they were more like $100.

I think people on this thread don't have teens yet. My teen ds is not in to tennis shoes but most of his friends are.

Anonymous wrote:My kids are growing up with so much more than I did. I don’t buy them much for Christmas as I think they already have so much. I am on a crusade to make sure my kids are not bratty even though they have pretty cushy lives.

Wouldn’t it make better sense to stop spoiling them year round rather than just on Christmas? And then trying to make middle class families feel bad for treating their children one day a year?

Anonymous wrote:Some people enjoy giving gifts. They say poor people give more money to charity than rich people do, too. I guess those things go hand in hand.

This is true from my experience running a local food pantry. We're in a region that is flooded with celebrities during summer/holiday season. If a charity doesn't offer the opportunity for photo ops, they will not donate. It's really horrible. You'd be floored if I named the celebs who do nothing, yet are very aware of the hidden faces of hunger among their estates.

On the bright side, we manage with donations from year round local residents & small businesses. We supplement weekly and provide food for hundreds of adults and children. Some clients who previously needed our help and no longer do, pay it forward. Usually a small donation of $25.00.

The most heartwarming moments are when we run out of milk or eggs. Too many times I've witnessed a senior resident forgo their milk/eggs for a family in line. Volunteers supplement with our own money when things run out. No one is turned away.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess our Christmas ski trip to Switzerland is lowbrow then.

Depends on why you're doing it. Skiing jetlagged isn't great and Swiss mountains, while fine, can't compare to the Rockies in terms of variety and run conditions, especially early in the season. European slopes also tend to be a zoo, especially the famous ones, especially during holidays.

Yeah I don't get why you're not going to Colorado or Utah actually. They are so much better/short lift lines, gorgeous snow, charming towns.

I really doubt that true. Working class/middle class kids have more extravagant Christmases than affluent kids?

I’m not buying OP’s theory.

My kids are growing up with so much more than I did. I don’t buy them much for Christmas as I think they already have so much. I am on a crusade to make sure my kids are not bratty even though they have pretty cushy lives.

I guess I buy for the kid I have, and her needs are simple - soft things, books, art supplies. So, we don't have very many high priced items under the tree. This isn't normal for us, but there is a high ticket item this year. It's DH's gift, a 3D printer. Which is for both DH and DD, although it is officially his gift. I think the next highest priced item is a set of art pens for DD. And I'm fairly certain her favorite gift will either be the white chocolate dipped Oreos, or the giant bag of lucky charms marshmallows.

I'm fairly certain that some of her friends will have much higher priced items than she will. Generally speaking though, if I show her why it doesn't make sense to give a kid something expensive, and she agrees.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So PP seems to say rich kids are such spoiled brats they don’t consider receiving expensive items anything special. And that’s why fewer gifts. I would never aspire to that.

Wait til your kids to go college. Our daughters wanted Barbour jackets. They are 400 dollars. In our house that is your only Xmas gift. I guess really rich people just pick one up while out shopping and then brag about not spending money at xmas.

NP here. I will love it when I can buy my kids one nice Christmas gift! Sounds ideal! Much less shopping and wrapping.