From evolutionary perspective one should not have kids if they are not equipped to feed them. I guess we have evolved far enough that it is actually possible for mammals to raise kids without actual mammaries, but I would still give it try before firmly deciding against it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your body, your choice.

I’d probably try in your shoes just to know what it’s actually like vs what I think it’s going to be like. Hormonal breast tenderness (like what I get during my period) is a much different feeling than breastfeeding.

But regardless, just not wanting to is a good enough reason not to do it. Your DH needs to back you on this because it sounds like this could just be beginning of unsolicited parenting advice from his relatives. He needs to shut it down now.

Stop telling her to try. What? Is her baby going to die if she doesn't try!!! SHE. DOES. NOT. WANT. TO NURSE.!!!??

How does she know she doesn't want to nurse if she has never even tried it?!? She will not even try? Not once?

NP: You just don't get it, don't you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

So PP, what's it like being a martyr? You sound miserable.

Not miserable at all. I love motherhood. But have my doubts about OP - she doesn't seem to understand the extent to which her life is about to change.

huh, that's funny. because I actually see the opposite: a woman with enough understand of herself and her needs when the baby comes that she can go against the grain of propaganda and decide ahead of time to skip breastfeeding. I have a tremendous amount of respect (and no small jealously, in retrospect!) for women who know enough to figure that out ahead of time.

Anonymous wrote:Breastfeeding is obviously best in terms of nutrition compared to formula. However, and that is a big however, having a newborn is in itself an emotionally and physically exhausting experience. You have a particular set of circumstances that will make breastfeeding harder than it already is. I'll echo PP's that you never know what it will be like for you until you try it. Honestly, the experience is different for everyone. That said, it is your body, it is your choice. Make the decision that is best for you and baby, and don't make a decision that is based on the echo chamber around you. It shouldn't even be a topic of conversation with them.

no, it's not "obviously best." not at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

Um what? Personally I consider it my responsibility as a parent (and adult) to avoid anxiety and pain, where possible. Why in the world would I purposefully create more anxiety and pain for myself (and therefore my family) when there's a perfectly reasonable non-anxiety producing, non-painful solution? Should OP also grind her own wheat for flour and wash all the clothes by hand? Till her own soil and grow all her own vegetables? How about a cow or a goat? Where does it all end?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

So PP, what's it like being a martyr? You sound miserable.

Not miserable at all. I love motherhood. But have my doubts about OP - she doesn't seem to understand the extent to which her life is about to change.

Wow, what a compassionate person. Glad you love motherhood, but I honestly feel bad for your children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

So PP, what's it like being a martyr? You sound miserable.

Not miserable at all. I love motherhood. But have my doubts about OP - she doesn't seem to understand the extent to which her life is about to change.

Anonymous wrote:Just be prepared for all the judgement you will feel when you bottle feed a small baby in public.

I have never judged another woman for this. Ever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

There is no extra credit for doing things the hardest way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

So PP, what's it like being a martyr? You sound miserable.

Anonymous wrote:Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

If OP avoids all aspects of motherhood that cause anxiety and pain, she may as well just give up now. She hasn't even had the kid yet and is already looking for shortcuts without even trying it out first.

Breast may be best, but only if all other factors are equal. If, however, nursing causes the mom a ton of heightened anxiety and pain, then breast is not best.

Breastfeeding is obviously best in terms of nutrition compared to formula. However, and that is a big however, having a newborn is in itself an emotionally and physically exhausting experience. You have a particular set of circumstances that will make breastfeeding harder than it already is. I'll echo PP's that you never know what it will be like for you until you try it. Honestly, the experience is different for everyone. That said, it is your body, it is your choice. Make the decision that is best for you and baby, and don't make a decision that is based on the echo chamber around you. It shouldn't even be a topic of conversation with them.

Don't.
My husband and his family was the same way. I really resented the fact that my boobs were a topic of conversation for his family here and abroad. Years later, we're all good, but it wasn't fun at the time.
I had no medical reason for not wanting to, and still I didn't. My children are happy and healthy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your body, your choice.

I’d probably try in your shoes just to know what it’s actually like vs what I think it’s going to be like. Hormonal breast tenderness (like what I get during my period) is a much different feeling than breastfeeding.

But regardless, just not wanting to is a good enough reason not to do it. Your DH needs to back you on this because it sounds like this could just be beginning of unsolicited parenting advice from his relatives. He needs to shut it down now.

Stop telling her to try. What? Is her baby going to die if she doesn't try!!! SHE. DOES. NOT. WANT. TO NURSE.!!!??

How does she know she doesn't want to nurse if she has never even tried it?!? She will not even try? Not once?