Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My worry about this is that the bar set for engagement is above the level of engagement of a normal parent with their neighbors, fellow parents, and often even friends.

I am involved in the PTO and if I had a job that took more of my time or mental energy, I would never be able to do this.

Engaging with other parents is not easy for an introvert and you only can talk to so many during dropoff or pickup.

The chance that people get left out when the norm in America is disengagement in every sphere is really high.

I think that society should have some more sympathy for parents who want to be involved but do not have unlimited time or temperaments suited for deeper engagement with people they don't know.

Certainly meetings can be welcoming and open. But they can't last forever and they eventually need to make decisions. Or leaders need to make decisions on things like organizing fundraisers or events. Or deadlines get blown and events don't happen at all.

I just don't know where the expected equilibrium is for a group like Kindred. Is it "be a little more like this!" or "end parent email because people without email can't email you."

I want life to work, for everyone, but I've only got 24 hours in a day.

Pp Kindred parent here, This! You’ve hit the nail spot on!

The idea of being inclusive to the extent bolder above taps into many parent engagement voids. Great insight here. Sorry that the post article spent so much time on race ... not new as race/gentrification used in the title as clickbait. YY isn’t even a gentrified school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems odd to me that YY is so prominently featured in this article since the school's demographics have been pretty consistent for years; i.e. it's not been affected by the gentrification that's the whole premise of the article.

They're trying to build bridges between people who want their child to learn Mandarin, and people who don't actually care.

No sympathy. If they want their kids to learn to speak anything approaching halfway decent Chinese during childhood, they needed to get a clue and live near a community of Mandarin speakers.

Hint: not in DC unless they're native speakers themselves. Total joke.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My worry about this is that the bar set for engagement is above the level of engagement of a normal parent with their neighbors, fellow parents, and often even friends.

I am involved in the PTO and if I had a job that took more of my time or mental energy, I would never be able to do this.

Engaging with other parents is not easy for an introvert and you only can talk to so many during dropoff or pickup.

The chance that people get left out when the norm in America is disengagement in every sphere is really high.

I think that society should have some more sympathy for parents who want to be involved but do not have unlimited time or temperaments suited for deeper engagement with people they don't know.

Certainly meetings can be welcoming and open. But they can't last forever and they eventually need to make decisions. Or leaders need to make decisions on things like organizing fundraisers or events. Or deadlines get blown and events don't happen at all.

I just don't know where the expected equilibrium is for a group like Kindred. Is it "be a little more like this!" or "end parent email because people without email can't email you."

I want life to work, for everyone, but I've only got 24 hours in a day.

Pp Kindred parent here, This! You’ve hit the nail spot on!

Anonymous wrote:stupid white liberals who are afraid to fix their school

look the majority of schools in DC suck until higher income folks come in. That's just a fact and in DC that means whites who have higher income than the existing mostly poorer black residents

Anonymous wrote:My worry about this is that the bar set for engagement is above the level of engagement of a normal parent with their neighbors, fellow parents, and often even friends.

I am involved in the PTO and if I had a job that took more of my time or mental energy, I would never be able to do this.

Engaging with other parents is not easy for an introvert and you only can talk to so many during dropoff or pickup.

The chance that people get left out when the norm in America is disengagement in every sphere is really high.

I think that society should have some more sympathy for parents who want to be involved but do not have unlimited time or temperaments suited for deeper engagement with people they don't know.

Certainly meetings can be welcoming and open. But they can't last forever and they eventually need to make decisions. Or leaders need to make decisions on things like organizing fundraisers or events. Or deadlines get blown and events don't happen at all.

I just don't know where the expected equilibrium is for a group like Kindred. Is it "be a little more like this!" or "end parent email because people without email can't email you."

I want life to work, for everyone, but I've only got 24 hours in a day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Non paid Kindred parent here.

If I reveal the school I’ll definitely be outed so please no pointed questions.

After being involved bi-weekly for over a year, I probably won’t do it this year. I see the intent that Kindred has, but they have a long way to go with actually achieving the goals expressed in the article.

I left every meeting feeling exposed, emotionally drained, and highly weary. It’s like being a victim of abuse and discrimination, then having to explain and teach other people who haven’t experienced the pain about it, then the meetings over and we all return to either our comfort or our hardship with no real solutions.

What was supremely frustrating about it was that it would have all been worth it if there were actual school policy and procedure changes that impacted the children in direct ways.

I like that I met people who I wouldn’t have otherwise met, I also feel like since they met me in that space it kind of marginalizes me to the caricature they see versus really building something based on our kids.

At our school Kindred seemed to be competing with the OTSo versus authentically supporting the existing pto which disturbed me.

Thank you for sharing. This was the alternative side I was hoping to hear. The danger in the article posted is that it was all sunshine and rainbows. Parents in my PTO are clambering to join forces with Kindred, without stopping to figure out the full picture. I am not saying it is a bad organization- and perhaps our PTO should decide to pair with them. But I do think it is important to hear all sides before aligning with a program no one knew about last week.

You are so right, the article was fluff journalism. I am often dismayed that feel good stories sometimes seem to come before basic journalistic skills at WaPo (not always - they should know better).

This type of work cannot come easy. Can you better explain what you mean here PP (bolded above)?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP non-paid Kindred parent here,

I’m not sure what the metrics are (not certain what data was collected before Kindred versus after Kindred type of thing).

If I had one wish for Kindred it would be that it could facilitate a pathway to increase parent engagement in existing PTOs for parents of moderate income , versus the current system at our school. Money and social currency is definitely is a barrier for participation for many parents.

One thing I related to from the article was the first statement Mike made about walking into a pto meeting and feeling unwelcomed. Not that anyone purposefully ignores or throw shade to a particular parent, but it can feel unwelcoming if one can’t rattle off a list of academic or social credentials just to participate and be treated with basic human kindness.

This makes so much sense. And it's also really unfair for white people to ask people of color to educate them on white privilege and racism. It isn't their job or responsibility. It's emotionally draining at best ... There are so many who just refuse to accept that white privilege exists, or that they are benefiting from structural racism.

I've mentioned this before on this board but if I were the dictator of DC for a week, I would force every white person to read White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism https://www.amazon.com/White-Fragility-People-About-Racism/dp/0807047414

Anonymous wrote:I completely related to this article. We left a school in a gentrifying neighborhood because the UMC parents taking over the PTO had absolutely no regard for less wealthy families. They demanded that the afterschool program be revamped to have more enrichment activities at a cost of $400/month for one kid and a nominal discount if you have a second kid. Even though many families said that they could not afford it even with a discount and assistance through fundraisers, the PTO steamrolled ahead. One family was so distraught because they had 2 kids but their combined HHI was just too much to qualify for discounts but not enough to afford afterschool for two kids. WE threw in the towel at that point.

Anonymous wrote:PP non-paid Kindred parent here,

I’m not sure what the metrics are (not certain what data was collected before Kindred versus after Kindred type of thing).

If I had one wish for Kindred it would be that it could facilitate a pathway to increase parent engagement in existing PTOs for parents of moderate income , versus the current system at our school. Money and social currency is definitely is a barrier for participation for many parents.

One thing I related to from the article was the first statement Mike made about walking into a pto meeting and feeling unwelcomed. Not that anyone purposefully ignores or throw shade to a particular parent, but it can feel unwelcoming if one can’t rattle off a list of academic or social credentials just to participate and be treated with basic human kindness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Non paid Kindred parent here.

If I reveal the school I’ll definitely be outed so please no pointed questions.

After being involved bi-weekly for over a year, I probably won’t do it this year. I see the intent that Kindred has, but they have a long way to go with actually achieving the goals expressed in the article.

I left every meeting feeling exposed, emotionally drained, and highly weary. It’s like being a victim of abuse and discrimination, then having to explain and teach other people who haven’t experienced the pain about it, then the meetings over and we all return to either our comfort or our hardship with no real solutions.

What was supremely frustrating about it was that it would have all been worth it if there were actual school policy and procedure changes that impacted the children in direct ways.

I like that I met people who I wouldn’t have otherwise met, I also feel like since they met me in that space it kind of marginalizes me to the caricature they see versus really building something based on our kids.

At our school Kindred seemed to be competing with the OTSo versus authentically supporting the existing pto which disturbed me.

Thank you for sharing. This was the alternative side I was hoping to hear. The danger in the article posted is that it was all sunshine and rainbows. Parents in my PTO are clambering to join forces with Kindred, without stopping to figure out the full picture. I am not saying it is a bad organization- and perhaps our PTO should decide to pair with them. But I do think it is important to hear all sides before aligning with a program no one knew about last week.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems odd to me that YY is so prominently featured in this article since the school's demographics have been pretty consistent for years; i.e. it's not been affected by the gentrification that's the whole premise of the article.

They're trying to build bridges between people who want their child to learn Mandarin, and people who don't actually care.