Kid is a full on pervert and an abuser and parents are turning a blind eye to it. I suggest, at the risk of losing this friendship, that you do something about it.

missed some of it. Crap

His mom thinks it's just brother sister love but it looks weird to me. The still sleep in the same room.

Today we hung out together at the pool and he would just pick her up and hold her close to his body and touch her like she's his toy the whole time we were there.

JHC! This is about a poor girl who is abused by her brother! Hopefully this didn't go further, but I'd be surprised if it hasn't. She probably knows that mom wouldn't believe her! Nobody in their right mind would ever think this is ok. Does he have retardation issues?

Talk to the Mom. Call CPS. Call their school and report your concerns, being sure to mention the sleeping arrangements. The more that are aware, the more that will be watching.

Ok I feel guilty so I have gone back and bolded everything concerning. I am the mom of a 14 yr old and a 10 yr old BTW.

My friend has a 13 year old boy and a 10 year old girl.

The boy has been very physical in playing with his sister. It's always initiated by him, not her. He constantly touches her, picks her up, holds her, he used to lie on top of her on the floor and kiss her.

His mom thinks it's just brother sister love but it looks weird to me. The still sleep in the same room.

Today we hung out together at the pool and he would just pick her up and hold her close to his body and touch her like she's his toy the whole time we were there.

Is this normal sibling affection?

He was weird like this a few years ago. For example, he would get on top of her on the floor and lie there and kiss her.

I don't know how she feels about it anymore. She sometimes be resists but he's strong and always gets his way, while parents just let them work things out. I think the girl just goes along. Feels like there are no boundaries respected at all. If she says no he doesn't stop and the parents just think kids will work it out themselves.

OK, fine. This is going to cost me a friendship whether I'm right or wrong.

I would bet money that he is raping her. You need to speak up to the friend and call CPS. They may need to hire a lawyer?? Horrific abuse is going on right under their eyes, I sure as hell hope they need a lawyer. That poor little girl.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I don't have proof that he's raping her. What if I'm mistaken and it's not sexual, just rough housing. This is serious accusations.

Is it ever normal for kids this age to share the room willingly?

OP, if the standard for reporting is that you have to be a direct eyewitness to sexual assault?!?!

Think this through. People that commit sexual assault--even hardcore serial rapists--generally have enough self-control to not commit their assault in open public with witnesses.
Every single person on this thread that has heard what you described has said that what you HAVE seen meets the threshold. It is sufficiently disturbing that it needs further investigation.

Even if the best case scenario occurs, and further investigation by authorities determines that there is no actual abuse, then it still has provided a very important wake up call to the family.
Both parents and their children need to learn what is acceptable. And what is happening now--IN PUBLIC--is not acceptable.

In a few years, the brother will be in high school. What if there is a girl he likes? I can assure you that if that kid did anything like what you've described to my daughter, I would be on the phone to police and we would be pressing charges.

The daughter needs to learn that if a boy in high school tries to touch her in that way... it is NOT okay, and despite the fact that her brother got away with it for years.

Again, I (and pretty much everyone else on this board) suspects there's more going on than what you've seen. What I'm saying is that even what you've seen needs to be addressed.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I don't have proof that he's raping her. What if I'm mistaken and it's not sexual, just rough housing. This is serious accusations.

Is it ever normal for kids this age to share the room willingly?

The only instance I have seen at these ages that wasn’t really weird was when the older brother had an intellectual disability and was basically a child in an early teen body. But in that case the parents were very actively working to teach boundaries.

I would be reluctant to have my own DD stay in the same house with this boy. If I were going to go I would also talk a lot about consent and space bubbles etc for my own DD’s benefit and perhaps to assist the other child.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I don't have proof that he's raping her. What if I'm mistaken and it's not sexual, just rough housing. This is serious accusations.

Is it ever normal for kids this age to share the room willingly?

Even if there is no sexual abuse, it is not healthy or appropriate behavior. I know several women who had brothers like this who physically abused and intimidated them, and they are traumatized even though there was no sexual abuse.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I don't have proof that he's raping her. What if I'm mistaken and it's not sexual, just rough housing. This is serious accusations.

Is it ever normal for kids this age to share the room willingly?

Of course you don't have proof that he's raping her.

You tell them what you have seen. Describe what you posted here.

My friend has a 13 year old boy and a 10 year old girl. The boy has been very physical in playing with his sister. It's always initiated by him, not her. He constantly touches her, picks her up, holds her, he used to lie on top of her on the floor and kiss her.
His mom thinks it's just brother sister love but it looks weird to me. The still sleep in the same room.

Today we hung out together at the pool and he would just pick her up and hold her close to his body and touch her like she's his toy the whole time we were there.
I don't know how she feels about it anymore. She sometimes be resists but he's strong and always gets his way, while parents just let them work things out. I think the girl just goes along. Feels like there are no boundaries respected at all. If she says no he doesn't stop and the parents just think kids will work it out themselves.

He was weird like this a few years ago. For example, he would get on top of her on the floor and lie there and kiss her.

You say you have kids. Do your 10 yr olds just want to be held in the pool? don't they like the jump in and swim around? Mine do.

And I got bored bolding your previous statement. There are so many red flags in it!

[img]

Anonymous wrote:My friend has a 13 year old boy and a 10 year old girl. The boy has been very physical in playing with his sister. It's always initiated by him, not her. He constantly touches her, picks her up, holds her, he used to lie on top of her on the floor and kiss her.

His mom thinks it's just brother sister love but it looks weird to me. The still sleep in the same room.

Today we hung out together at the pool and he would just pick her up and hold her close to his body and touch her like she's his toy the whole time we were there.

Is this normal sibling affection?

R-A-P-E. No question. Yet, OP remains silent.

Look OP. I have worked in a child abuse clinic. This is abuse. Children can abuse other children. You said so yourself that the sister is not consenting to these advances. God know what is happening in that bedroom. He is off age to do things/be sexually curious. You need to intervene. You cannot watch in silence. CPS will hopefully get both of the children help and will work with the family. Someone needs to help this poor girl. Please do the right thing.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but I don't have proof that he's raping her. What if I'm mistaken and it's not sexual, just rough housing. This is serious accusations.

Is it ever normal for kids this age to share the room willingly?

Please stop making up excuses for the rapist.
Not your job to prove it.
But it is your job to report what you see.

Tons of foolish, naive parents out there like OP.
No girl wants to be pinned on the floor and assaulted by her brother.

OP is being complicit in this egregious sex abuse.