Op I wouldn't make too much effort to change him. Unfortunately you can try and educate him but if he is not open it's pointless. Some people are just lost and unfortunately your brother sounds to blame for what's happened. It's not your job to fix. At this point your nephew is an adult.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

His method doesn't help. I'm not saying get in a tizzy of every slight but his way of thinking is dangerous. That's like saying let's ignore rapes, homeless, or poverty and they should go away. His ignorance only helps him and no one else.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He actually said Go back to your country and improve things there (instead of come here, publicly rail on america 5 years in to living here, run for small district office, and try to change America to your liking).

He said this to congresswomen born in the United States you idiot. Only one of the four was born outside of the U.S.

This is the definition of racism. He assumes that because the congresswomen are not white they aren’t real Americans.

The ^^PP also assumed it, hence the post. This is probably one of the things OP's nephew is unaware of, that these words are indeed racist because they are generally thrown at non white people, and the ignorant ahole who says these words (ahem.. Trump) usually aSSumes that the nonwhite person was not born here.

I am a white naturalized US citizen with a clearly foreign name. I can be, and have been a target of ignorant ridicule and xenophobia, but being a target does not make one a victim.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He actually said Go back to your country and improve things there (instead of come here, publicly rail on america 5 years in to living here, run for small district office, and try to change America to your liking).

He said this to congresswomen born in the United States you idiot. Only one of the four was born outside of the U.S.

This is the definition of racism. He assumes that because the congresswomen are not white they aren’t real Americans.

The ^^PP also assumed it, hence the post. This is probably one of the things OP's nephew is unaware of, that these words are indeed racist because they are generally thrown at non white people, and the ignorant ahole who says these words (ahem.. Trump) usually aSSumes that the nonwhite person was not born here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

How do you know he's not ignorant, and that you are just projecting? I don't know either, which is why I stated "or"...

Sometimes the other side is truly ignorant, like the whole "go back to your country" thing with Trump, as if that is not racist.

Yet saying "go back to your country" has absolutely zero impact on anyone I know who is here as a US citizen. Just words...

Having racist words thrown at you is still being impacted by racism. Only a white person would think that is not the case.

Are you saying that if OP's nephew was called the N word it would not impact him? Does it stop him from living his life? No, of course not. Neither does his MIL hating him because of his race. But, I'm betting that OP's nephew would still feel awful if he was called the N word.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

How do you know he's not ignorant, and that you are just projecting? I don't know either, which is why I stated "or"...

Sometimes the other side is truly ignorant, like the whole "go back to your country" thing with Trump, as if that is not racist.

Yet saying "go back to your country" has absolutely zero impact on anyone I know who is here as a US citizen. Just words...

I immigrated here legally and it doesn’t impact me in the sense that your words aren’t going to change my actions/plans.

You’re still a racist though, but it’s on you to live with that.

Anonymous wrote:He actually said Go back to your country and improve things there (instead of come here, publicly rail on america 5 years in to living here, run for small district office, and try to change America to your liking).

He said this to congresswomen born in the United States you idiot. Only one of the four was born outside of the U.S.

This is the definition of racism. He assumes that because the congresswomen are not white they aren’t real Americans.

He actually said Go back to your country and improve things there (instead of come here, publicly rail on america 5 years in to living here, run for small district office, and try to change America to your liking).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

How do you know he's not ignorant, and that you are just projecting? I don't know either, which is why I stated "or"...

Sometimes the other side is truly ignorant, like the whole "go back to your country" thing with Trump, as if that is not racist.

Yet saying "go back to your country" has absolutely zero impact on anyone I know who is here as a US citizen. Just words...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

How do you know he's not ignorant, and that you are just projecting? I don't know either, which is why I stated "or"...

Sometimes the other side is truly ignorant, like the whole "go back to your country" thing with Trump, as if that is not racist.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Except he's not ignorant, he just doesn't attribute slights in the same way as others. The other side is just as ignorant because they ASSUME malice while being ignorant as to whether it really is... I'll live like the nephew anyday...

Anonymous wrote:Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

.. or "ignorance is bliss".

Thread summary....

When you don't perceive things as holding you back...
They don't hold you back....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a nephew that is so clueless about systemic racism and I wish he understood how it does impact him.
He grew up in a whitewashed neighborhood. Mother is white and father was absent. His wife is white and basically all of his friends are white.
He does have a sister but other than that no other POC near him. His aunt (my sister) who he is close to lives a state away. Anyways, for the longest time his MIL did not like him. He did not understand why. It came to light it was because of his race. Although biracial she saw him as a black man. They have a good relationship now but he was that clueless. I’ve recently moved into the area to be close to him. He was my buddy growing up but my career took me out of the country so I didn’t se him as often. I want to help him understand. But I’m not sure he gets it. I’m at a loss but I want to help him see he isn’t immune. *I know neither am I. Advice.

You have a lot of hate and resentment. Pls get therapy. You look at everything through the lens of racism, hatred and victim hood no matter what will happen to you, your friends or your family members.
I do the same because I am Jewish and have holocaust survivors. It took a lot of therapy to get healthy. I thought everyone secretly hated me and plotted against me because of my race and religion, and be able to trust people of any color or religion.

+1
This is how the OP comes across

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, all I’m reading from your post is that you don’t find your biracial nephew to be somehow black enough for your liking.

He’s not clueless. He’s grown up as a POC in even what you deem to be a “whitewashed” environment. He’s negotiated his colour his whole life, and has chosen not to be angry, or whatever it is you feel he should be. Everyone has a different lived experience, and can choose how they want to deal with it. Yes, systemic racism is a problem, but he can choose to deal with it in his own way, and that would appear by killing them with patience, tolerance, perseverance, and kindness.

Not everything in life needs to be an angry tirade in order to effect change.

DP, WTF??
I have no comment on OP’s situation but you are full of s***. Pointing out, rejecting and dealing head on with racism does not mean someone is “angry”
Who are you to tell someone that the way to deal with racism is for you to be kind. WTF are you telling racists that they need to do?
Do you tell raise victims that the way to deal with that is to be kind to their rapists???
At this point I think this entire thread was started by a troll intent on posting racist comments.
Sigh

I don’t tell anyone how to deal with anything. Their experience is their experience, and to this point: it seems that nephew has not chosen to fill his life with anger. That is 100% his choice. His choices have nothing to Do with him being “clueless”. He might outright reject racism, but choose to deal with it his way. He is already living HIS life, in his skin, and, given OPs post, has experienced racism in his family. He’s decided not to get pissy, or turn into some angry activist type, and that is making OP livid. THAT is the problem. No one should dictate, or surmise they CAN dictate, how another person deals with their issues, be it racism, misogyny, homophobia, ableism, etc. OP is ticked right off that nephew isn’t following some kind of prescribed course of being angry about persecution, and not wanting to understand that is not HIS experience or way of dealing with racism. That is his right, an no more or less correct than what OP wants.