Anonymous wrote:It's pretty incredible that many seem to have empathy for OP's stepdaughter, and yet fail to consider what OP might have been going through taking care of both a young child and a dying husband with an impossible ex-wife and difficult teenage step daughter.

That can be very traumatizing.

OP should take care of her son and herself.

Anonymous wrote:OP here and resurrecting the thread. She continued contacting me repeatedly on social media. After realizing I wouldn't answer, she began contacting MY relatives saying that she wants to see her brother and that it's her right. I have no desire to ever communicate with that girl. I certainly don't think she should see my son. He's a young boy, very vulnerable and sensitive. I have contacted her mother who was very surprised at this sudden expression of attention. She confirmed that her daughter has been having some mental issues and has done drugs. She's been in rehab. I told her that it would be best if our children were not to meet, too much animosity and that she really shouldn't violate other people's privacy.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think your update paints you in the light you think it does. It turns out she wants to meet her brother? Mental problems or not, why is that a bad motive? Obviously your ex-step-daughter shouldn’t be alone with your son, but i don’t think it’s weird that someone who had gotten older and done some introspection — even rehab-mandated/inspired introspection — wants to meet her brother. She may have thought calling him your son would butter you up/make it clear she respected your role. I also don’t know why you’d take her mother — who clearly wasn’t interested in you two having any relationship ever — at face value, which it sounds like you’ve done.

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Anonymous wrote:Her parents divorced when she was 5. We met when she was 14, married when she was 17. No one stole her father. The only thing she and her mother were concerned when he got sick was "are the child support checks coming?". She never visited him. The only time she'd call him was to ask for money. So "forgive me" if I am resentful and have a "kneejerk" reaction. My parents also divorced when I was young. But I never acted like that towards their new spouses and we had solid relationships. Even though my parents are long gone, I still talk to my stepmother and stepfather.

Again: What do you want to hear? You don't like your stepdaughter, don't talk to her. But we're not going to tell you you're fabulous for making that decision.

I'm Team OP. OP has no obligation to her late DH's DD AT ALL. They never had a relationship and the girl is no one to her. It is no loss to OP to just pretend this person doesn't exist. And it is within OP's rights to deny the stepdaughter access to her own son given that she doesn't know what this person's intentions are. I wouldn't trust her, would you?

Yes but, that girl is the half-sister of OP's son. That is a family tie.