Anonymous
04/25/2022 21:29
Subject: I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Consider therapy.
Even if you’re a typical “mutt,” that doesn’t mean you weren’t raised to believe that boys are more important or more valuable. I suspect that you want people on here to tell you that you can’t change how you feel, etc....but you absolutely need to work on this.
This. There’s plenty of misogyny in “typical” American culture.
Also, cautionary tale. My grandfather in law favored my husband over his sisters. To the tune of leaving him a ton of money he did not leave to them. Every family event his sisters make fun of how gross their grandfather was to be so blatant in his favoritism, and my husband doesn’t defend his grandfather. So are you looking forward to a legacy or being a family punchline and even your precious grandson doesn’t stick up for your indefensible behavior?
He doesn’t stick up for him but did he share the inheritance?
Anonymous
04/20/2022 22:01
Subject: I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
Anonymous wrote:Consider therapy.
Even if you’re a typical “mutt,” that doesn’t mean you weren’t raised to believe that boys are more important or more valuable. I suspect that you want people on here to tell you that you can’t change how you feel, etc....but you absolutely need to work on this.
This. There’s plenty of misogyny in “typical” American culture.
Also, cautionary tale. My grandfather in law favored my husband over his sisters. To the tune of leaving him a ton of money he did not leave to them. Every family event his sisters make fun of how gross their grandfather was to be so blatant in his favoritism, and my husband doesn’t defend his grandfather. So are you looking forward to a legacy or being a family punchline and even your precious grandson doesn’t stick up for your indefensible behavior?
Anonymous
04/20/2022 19:39
Subject: Re:I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
It’s okay, I’m sure grandchild isn’t liking you either.
Anonymous
04/20/2022 19:38
Subject: I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
I'm not a grandparent but my first is definitely my mom and in-laws pride and joy and that's mainly because we practically lived between both of their houses when he was born before we bought our own. My mom also lived with us at one point.
So yes, I notice a difference between their relationships with their other grandchildren. I just think the biggest factor is time spent.
So yes, I notice a difference between their relationships with their other grandchildren. I just think the biggest factor is time spent.
Anonymous
04/20/2022 18:55
Subject: Re:I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
This is nonsense. You are closer to one grandkid than the other because you have spent more time with one grandkid. Spend more time with the other grandkid and you will feel the same for her. It's normal to feel closer to family members that you spend more time with.
+1 The adoration you have for your grandson was cultivated over time, so devote some extra time to the girl for now to help you cultivate those feelings. You may find it easier to bond with her as she grows and becomes more interactive.
Anonymous
04/20/2022 18:36
Subject: I am not feeling it for my second grandchild
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You should feel guilty. That's horrible. If you let these feelings and preferences show outwardly, know that your grandaughter will feel it, she will be hurt, and she will remember it.
Speaking from experience.
I know this. How do I change my feelings?
This is nonsense. You are closer to one grandkid than the other because you have spent more time with one grandkid. Spend more time with the other grandkid and you will feel the same for her. It's normal to feel closer to family members that you spend more time with.