ZachF
Post 08/18/2017 00:42     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:There are people here saying fat women just don't give men erections...

That is sad... and obviously know nothing about chubby chasers. There are more men interested in "fat women" than skinny... believe me!!

As for the OP - you can work out or tell him to f off and leave his a$$!

Something tells me his "fat wallet" will be a lot more skinnier and loveable then...


Yeah rigghhhtt. Keep telling yourself that. And no matter, her H isn't one of them and it doesn't sound like he's going to change into one of them because she gained 50. To be certain, there are chubby chasers and chasers of all kinds of types. You are delusional if you think there the majority of men like them fat. The decent shape, miserable husband of a fat wife is way too common a thing.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 18:26     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
We'll look on the bright side. It's so,thing you have same amount of agency over. You can work to lose the weight if you choose.

Better than all the male celebs you see dumping their wives because they got old.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 18:24     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:After 19 years of marriage, DH told me I am fat. He isn't attracted me to at this size.
I have gained weight. He weighs the same as when we married. He is obsessed with being fit and slim. He grew up bullied as he was overweight. He weighs him self twice a day and does 8 work outs a week.
I totally agree I am fat and I gained weight. I just feel really sad that he can't find me attractive at this size. I watched my mom battle breast cancer and chemo. She lost her breast and hair, yet to my dad she was the most beautiful woman. I'm sad I don't have that unconditional love.
I watch my overweight friends who have DHs who find them gorgeous. Yet, I don't have that.


I feel you, OP. I wish I had unconditional love too. My weight has fluctuated over the years. Finally got to a healthy weight last year but gained some of it back. DH has made jokes and not be terribly supportive. I feel so alone at times.

Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 18:12     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:OP, here is another anecdote.

DH started working from home and stopped working out. There were stretches of time where he wore the same clothes, did not shower, brush his hair for 3 days at a time. Finally, I gently told him that I felt like he was not making an effort and that the message I got was that he did not care what I thought or whether I found him attractive. He realized he was in a rut, and he stepped it up again. No, he does not need to dress up to work at home, but basic hygiene and clean clothes were important. He also lost 30 lbs and looks amazing and I appreciate that he strives to maintain attractiveness to me. It does not mean that I love/loved him less when he was kind of a slob, but it did bug me.

I have responded before.

To this I would say, why are you focusing on him? A plausible explanation is so you don't have to focus on yourself.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 18:05     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What does he do to make it possible for you to exercise? Or does he dump you with the kids so that he has plenty of time?


It's a lock this is the case!


Oh please. He seems to find time to exercise. Is OP saying she can't get off her bum to find the time either? She's just the victim of his working out? Abandoned to tend to the children with no time to ever work out? I doubt that.


Um, jackass, he is working out twice a day. Before and after work. When exactly is she supposed to work out?
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 17:09     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
My DH has got a pooch, balding head, greying hair and hair in places it never used to be and he doesn't have the stamina that he did in bed, but I wouldn't trade him for anyone. Your DH is a jerk.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 17:05     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:There are people here saying fat women just don't give men erections...

That is sad... and obviously know nothing about chubby chasers. There are more men interested in "fat women" than skinny... believe me!!

As for the OP - you can work out or tell him to f off and leave his a$$!

Something tells me his "fat wallet" will be a lot more skinnier and loveable then...


If more men are chubby chasers and like fat women then explain how rich successful men always have thin women. I have never seen a rock star or athlete with an obese woman.


Wait, is the DH a rock star or athlete????
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 17:04     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
You have a dud, he probably is getting old and limp and blames your body for his limpness. Some men are idiots.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:54     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:There are people here saying fat women just don't give men erections...

That is sad... and obviously know nothing about chubby chasers. There are more men interested in "fat women" than skinny... believe me!!

As for the OP - you can work out or tell him to f off and leave his a$$!

Something tells me his "fat wallet" will be a lot more skinnier and loveable then...


If more men are chubby chasers and like fat women then explain how rich successful men always have thin women. I have never seen a rock star or athlete with an obese woman.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:50     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
There are people here saying fat women just don't give men erections...

That is sad... and obviously know nothing about chubby chasers. There are more men interested in "fat women" than skinny... believe me!!

As for the OP - you can work out or tell him to f off and leave his a$$!

Something tells me his "fat wallet" will be a lot more skinnier and loveable then...
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:44     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He didn't say he didn't love you, just that he wasn't attracted to you. attraction isn't something that is entirely within someone's control. He can't just choose to be attracted to someone who is obese. Especially since fitness and self care is something he values.


This. My DH gained 15 lbs during our 7 year marriage. He now has a double chin and looks unattractive or less attractive. Of course I still love him but I would prefer him at his wedding day weight. I stayed the same weight through 2 kids. I feel I'm chubby (though BMI is normal) and I prefer my looks when I used to be 10 lbs lighter during my 20s. Let's not kid ourselves that fat is attractive. Do you really want to hear the lie that you look gorgeous? I'd rather get an honest answer.


Yes. My husband gained about thirty and balded. I am still thin and look very attractive. I still love him but When we are intimate I fantasize about men with hot bodies. You can't let yourself go and demand that your partner still finds you hot. It is bait and switch.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:38     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:17     Subject: DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:He didn't say he didn't love you, just that he wasn't attracted to you. attraction isn't something that is entirely within someone's control. He can't just choose to be attracted to someone who is obese. Especially since fitness and self care is something he values.


This. My DH gained 15 lbs during our 7 year marriage. He now has a double chin and looks unattractive or less attractive. Of course I still love him but I would prefer him at his wedding day weight. I stayed the same weight through 2 kids. I feel I'm chubby (though BMI is normal) and I prefer my looks when I used to be 10 lbs lighter during my 20s. Let's not kid ourselves that fat is attractive. Do you really want to hear the lie that you look gorgeous? I'd rather get an honest answer.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 16:12     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
OP, here is another anecdote.

DH started working from home and stopped working out. There were stretches of time where he wore the same clothes, did not shower, brush his hair for 3 days at a time. Finally, I gently told him that I felt like he was not making an effort and that the message I got was that he did not care what I thought or whether I found him attractive. He realized he was in a rut, and he stepped it up again. No, he does not need to dress up to work at home, but basic hygiene and clean clothes were important. He also lost 30 lbs and looks amazing and I appreciate that he strives to maintain attractiveness to me. It does not mean that I love/loved him less when he was kind of a slob, but it did bug me.
Anonymous
Post 08/17/2017 15:43     Subject: Re:DH is a superficial ass
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Tell that ass to go to hell.

If my husband EVER told me I was fat and unattractive I'd lose 180 pounds over night and have him served with divorce papers the next day. What a mean thing your husband did.

Take his shit and find happiness without him. Who the f does he think he is ? God's gift ?

I would never let any man tell me to lose weight. For him. F him.


180 pounds overweight is huge and would take an incredible amount of effort, time and discipline to lose in a healthy manner. You should get off DCUM and get to work, baby.


Wth? 180 lbs IS the husband.