Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

My parents live in Florida, not ready to move up this way yet, but my mom doesn't want to miss out on a relationship with her granddaughter especially since DH's family is local ( Maryland).

Mom is retired so she figures she can fly up here a week at a time get to know the baby.

I know it sounds crazy, but this is important to her and I want my daughter to know her grandmother too,

I'm a nanny who dealt with almost this same situation. G'ma was out pf state but was going to fly in twice a month to to keep baby and I would have that time off. I started the position in January. By mid March G'ma decided she couldn't fly out here as often and stopped completely in April. The whole thing was a shit show.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Crazy, huh? I don't know what you think it takes to accomplish these things, but I have a decent idea because I WAH. It's probably 2 hours or less, and all done while DS is napping. If he's fussy/won't sleep etc, then she doesn't get stuff done. No big deal, and she knows that. Do you think that SAHP's don't do these things while caring for an infant? Do you also think that if you have an infant and an older child that you need a second nanny because a nanny can't possibly handle running after a toddler while caring for an infant? Though I should clarify that I had 4+ mos maternity leaves for both kids, and older DD started pre-school before DS was born. I guess if you are thinking about a newborn, then it would be difficult.

FWIW, she only does kids' laundry and washes sheets/towels once a week. We do our own laundry. Most nannies do children's laundry and prepare children's meals (we have an older kid, so she'd be cooking for her anyway), so there isn't a lot of extra work. She's not cooking gourmet french meals or anything.

Doing children's laundry and making children's meals is within the job description (although I'd be sure to clarify that ahead of time when you hire her.) But most nannies absolutely do not do the family's laundry and grocery shopping. I did not expect my nanny to be the same as a SAHP. I wanted her to do childcare, not housework.

You need to learn reading comprehension. I noted that explicitly...but I pointed out that it isn't that much extra work. My older DD loves going to the grocery store on her way home from school, and so does DS. It's an outing for them...one that's often recommended as good for child development if you talk to kids about what they're seeing while shopping.

Anyway, for OP, what's in the job description is what you put in the job description. It seems like daycare where you don't put the kid in when your mom's around or a FT nanny are both options depending on your preference. I think enough of us have posted here to make you feel comfortable that you can find a good nanny who also won't be offended if you ask her to do something non-childcare related. IME, you will pay more for such a nanny, and you need to be very up front about your expectations when you hire her.

You're still not being clear on what the work was. Picking up an item you forgot at the store once in a while when they walk past it on the way home is not the same as "meal planning and grocery shopping" as permanent, ongoing duties for the whole family.

I don't doubt that there are some nannies who don't mind housework and will agree to do it. My nannies spontaneously started emptying the dishwasher and doing any dishes left in the since, which was amazing ... and very much not required. The fact is, if you try to REQUIRE your nanny to do a significant load of non-child related housework, you better be prepared to pay her more than the going rate for it. Because the standard nanny job in DC does NOT involve a ton of housework, and the good nannies don't have to take every job offered to them. And nannies talk to each other, so they know very well what kind of employers are out there.

I think it's pretty clear that these are my nanny's ongoing responsibilities. I've also been pretty clear that this was part of the job description and discussed in the interviews and also reflected in what we pay.

Just because you can't fathom that such a person exists doesn't mean she doesn't. All of us who have nannies with broader responsibilities have advised OP to be clear about expectations up front and expect to pay more if she decides to hire a nanny. Stop confusing her with your insistence that only underpaid and exploited nannies would deign to put a dirty dish in the dishwasher. Frankly, I don't know who you people are. It's not about things being beneath them, it's about being a self-starter who is more concerned with getting things done than some overly rigid definition of what their job is. I have a PhD from Harvard, and I happily would offer to fetch my boss coffee or lunch when he was over-worked. And crazily enough, when I was hobbling around on crutches he even would offer to fetch me coffee. Successful people in whatever role they are in don't think legitimate tasks are beneath them.

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

My parents live in Florida, not ready to move up this way yet, but my mom doesn't want to miss out on a relationship with her granddaughter especially since DH's family is local ( Maryland).

Mom is retired so she figures she can fly up here a week at a time get to know the baby.

I know it sounds crazy, but this is important to her and I want my daughter to know her grandmother too,

Anonymous wrote:
My nanny is a US Citizen, employed legally on the books with OT and does housework. She started when my first child was a baby. In the beginning, never asked her to do anything beyond folding laundry from the dryer, but she had the time because he was napping a lot, and is the type of person who likes to be busy. She suggested that she cook 2-3x a week for us and she empties the dishwasher and does other chores without ever having been asked. We've employed her for 5 years now (I have two kids). She still does housework even now that she's watching 2 kids (my little one naps, and my older one has half the day in preschool). Nannies are expensive, and part of the reason we've made the effort to continuously employ her is because she has shown the willingness to help around the house. The value added of coming home to dinner prepared and a number of household chores done is worth it for us, even though we're paying more than we would with just daycare. And with the stability of a 5 year job, regular pay raises and a vacation allotment, our nanny has bought a home for her family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Crazy, huh? I don't know what you think it takes to accomplish these things, but I have a decent idea because I WAH. It's probably 2 hours or less, and all done while DS is napping. If he's fussy/won't sleep etc, then she doesn't get stuff done. No big deal, and she knows that. Do you think that SAHP's don't do these things while caring for an infant? Do you also think that if you have an infant and an older child that you need a second nanny because a nanny can't possibly handle running after a toddler while caring for an infant? Though I should clarify that I had 4+ mos maternity leaves for both kids, and older DD started pre-school before DS was born. I guess if you are thinking about a newborn, then it would be difficult.

FWIW, she only does kids' laundry and washes sheets/towels once a week. We do our own laundry. Most nannies do children's laundry and prepare children's meals (we have an older kid, so she'd be cooking for her anyway), so there isn't a lot of extra work. She's not cooking gourmet french meals or anything.

Doing children's laundry and making children's meals is within the job description (although I'd be sure to clarify that ahead of time when you hire her.) But most nannies absolutely do not do the family's laundry and grocery shopping. I did not expect my nanny to be the same as a SAHP. I wanted her to do childcare, not housework.

You need to learn reading comprehension. I noted that explicitly...but I pointed out that it isn't that much extra work. My older DD loves going to the grocery store on her way home from school, and so does DS. It's an outing for them...one that's often recommended as good for child development if you talk to kids about what they're seeing while shopping.

Anyway, for OP, what's in the job description is what you put in the job description. It seems like daycare where you don't put the kid in when your mom's around or a FT nanny are both options depending on your preference. I think enough of us have posted here to make you feel comfortable that you can find a good nanny who also won't be offended if you ask her to do something non-childcare related. IME, you will pay more for such a nanny, and you need to be very up front about your expectations when you hire her.

You're still not being clear on what the work was. Picking up an item you forgot at the store once in a while when they walk past it on the way home is not the same as "meal planning and grocery shopping" as permanent, ongoing duties for the whole family.

I don't doubt that there are some nannies who don't mind housework and will agree to do it. My nannies spontaneously started emptying the dishwasher and doing any dishes left in the since, which was amazing ... and very much not required. The fact is, if you try to REQUIRE your nanny to do a significant load of non-child related housework, you better be prepared to pay her more than the going rate for it. Because the standard nanny job in DC does NOT involve a ton of housework, and the good nannies don't have to take every job offered to them. And nannies talk to each other, so they know very well what kind of employers are out there.

Anonymous wrote:Only you know your mom, but the idea of requesting one week on and one week off sounds crazy to me. Does she really think you're going to be able to find someone else to watch your child every other week? I would get a nanny and maybe let your mom have one day every week or every other week, but make sure the nanny will be willing to come on those days as well because your mom kind of sounds like the kind of person who would change their mind about this a few weeks in.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of my friends who had nannies did house work, too. Maybe it's cultural. My DD is in daycare so I've never had one but my sister and many other friends always said that their nannies would cook, clean, even do laundry when the baby was sleeping. I remember my sister's nanny would ask them to buy certain products so the nanny could cook them meals while the baby was sleeping. And no, none of them are low class at all.

Were these legal, on-the-books, nannies in the US getting paid OT as appropriate?

My nanny is a US Citizen, employed legally on the books with OT and does housework. She started when my first child was a baby. In the beginning, never asked her to do anything beyond folding laundry from the dryer, but she had the time because he was napping a lot, and is the type of person who likes to be busy. She suggested that she cook 2-3x a week for us and she empties the dishwasher and does other chores without ever having been asked. We've employed her for 5 years now (I have two kids). She still does housework even now that she's watching 2 kids (my little one naps, and my older one has half the day in preschool). Nannies are expensive, and part of the reason we've made the effort to continuously employ her is because she has shown the willingness to help around the house. The value added of coming home to dinner prepared and a number of household chores done is worth it for us, even though we're paying more than we would with just daycare. And with the stability of a 5 year job, regular pay raises and a vacation allotment, our nanny has bought a home for her family.