Anonymous
04/08/2017 11:34
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:It only takes one no for that not to happen and he didn't say it. I'm not sure I'd even care about this, but if you do, you need to let him know, not HER
He did the right thing by telling you, but needs to amend his reaction with "if this is ANY woman my wife will kill me" if you mutually agree on this.
Anonymous
04/08/2017 11:33
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
It only takes one no for that not to happen and he didn't say it. I'm not sure I'd even care about this, but if you do, you need to let him know, not you.
He did the right thing by telling you, but needs to amend his reaction with "if this is ANY woman my wife will kill me" if you mutually agree on this.
He did the right thing by telling you, but needs to amend his reaction with "if this is ANY woman my wife will kill me" if you mutually agree on this.
Anonymous
04/08/2017 11:19
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes women. Like this just need to be put in their place, and if that was my husband I would certainly not let it go unnoticed, but make sure she knew she embarrassed herself and we were all laughing at her.
But they're not. I mean, nobody is applauding, but it sounds like they are mostly bemused and made uncomfortable by her behavior, not clanning up and laughing at her like a troupe of hyenas.
She's got problems. It's embarrassing to watch someone display that. This husband was a good guy about it, down to the telling and the cleaning and the listening to his wife about what to do next time. And she was, and is, a great wife.
Encouraging her to shame someone through pretense -- someone who is, frankly, both less classy and less enviable than she is -- just makes less of everyone involved.
This chick is making her own bed. She'll have to lie in it eventually. That's punishment enough.
Anonymous
04/07/2017 17:36
Subject: Re:Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Buy him a decorative pin that he can keep on his person. Next time a woman sits on his lap he can stick the pin in her backside!
Man, this is a business opportunity!! I think there is a market for such pins. Need a catchy name for this product now.
Bitch Stick.
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:52
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Help with what? You don't get to control her
Special ed teacher here. If someone goes to sit on your lap, and you don't want them to, you stand up. It's not hard if you're sitting on a chair (a little more complicated if it's circle time with the little ones and you're on the floor).
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:50
Subject: Re:Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Buy him a decorative pin that he can keep on his person. Next time a woman sits on his lap he can stick the pin in her backside!
Man, this is a business opportunity!! I think there is a market for such pins. Need a catchy name for this product now.
Ok...I just spit out my coffee! LOL!!!!!!
We'll call it a "Whore Gore". Obvs.
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:45
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Op again
The fact that she asked is someone looking at us makes me think she knew what she was doing. Drink or not she couldn't have been that drunk. DH said people has some wine with dinner but nothing crazy.
I don't blame DH. I wish he had gotten up or told her to move but I understand not knowing what to do and make it a big deal Infront of his boss.
I absolutely fault her for being inappropriate.
Sure she knew what she was doing. If you haven't encountered a woman like this, then you simply haven't been around. There are woman in every profession that believe their "playfulness", "sexiness", "attractiveness" or whatever they call it, is an asset. They are touchy, feely when talking to men they wink or flirt or get pouty or sit in your lap when they want something. If they don't get something, it's because the person doesn't like them or is jealous of them. Given your husband's reaction, she's harmless to your marriage and the only person she's hurting at work is herself. She will sit in the wrong lap and have someone expect more and then she will get all offended and not understand how he could have expected that. At some point, she will hit an age where she realizes it doesn't get her the attention she craves and then she will need counseling.
Yes, indeed.
I wrote the prior response about putting this woman in her place if you see her (and if that's your style), but really she will hang herself. She thinks she's so cool, and so "in", and so very important and everyone just adores her. Blech. Especially with her comment about you being like a little sister. Sometimes women. Like this just need to be put in their place, and if that was my husband I would certainly not let it go unnoticed, but make sure she knew she embarrassed herself and we were all laughing at her.
She must be awful to work with
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:37
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Op again
The fact that she asked is someone looking at us makes me think she knew what she was doing. Drink or not she couldn't have been that drunk. DH said people has some wine with dinner but nothing crazy.
I don't blame DH. I wish he had gotten up or told her to move but I understand not knowing what to do and make it a big deal Infront of his boss.
I absolutely fault her for being inappropriate.
Sure she knew what she was doing. If you haven't encountered a woman like this, then you simply haven't been around. There are woman in every profession that believe their "playfulness", "sexiness", "attractiveness" or whatever they call it, is an asset. They are touchy, feely when talking to men they wink or flirt or get pouty or sit in your lap when they want something. If they don't get something, it's because the person doesn't like them or is jealous of them. Given your husband's reaction, she's harmless to your marriage and the only person she's hurting at work is herself. She will sit in the wrong lap and have someone expect more and then she will get all offended and not understand how he could have expected that. At some point, she will hit an age where she realizes it doesn't get her the attention she craves and then she will need counseling.
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:19
Subject: Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Honestly I would try to embarrass her about it the next time I saw her. To get the upper hand and put her in her place.
A cheerfully loud "Oh hey Anne, is this stool taken or should I just sit on your lap" with a pointed look as you walk away, if you are at a bar, or at her office "still want me in the dental chair or should I just sit on your lap?"
It's a play to assert dominance, for sure, but if you do it in laughing breezy way she'll know you were told, she's ridiculous, and that neither of you care.
A cheerfully loud "Oh hey Anne, is this stool taken or should I just sit on your lap" with a pointed look as you walk away, if you are at a bar, or at her office "still want me in the dental chair or should I just sit on your lap?"
It's a play to assert dominance, for sure, but if you do it in laughing breezy way she'll know you were told, she's ridiculous, and that neither of you care.
Anonymous
04/07/2017 12:07
Subject: Re:Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:Buy him a decorative pin that he can keep on his person. Next time a woman sits on his lap he can stick the pin in her backside!
Man, this is a business opportunity!! I think there is a market for such pins. Need a catchy name for this product now.
Ok...I just spit out my coffee! LOL!!!!!!
Anonymous
04/07/2017 11:55
Subject: Re:Another woman sat on my DHs lap
Anonymous wrote:As you said, you don't know the context. But if any case, if anyone did that at any of my office parties, there would DEFINITELY be gossip about it. Mostly though about the person plopping on someone's else lap. It's very unprofessional and inappropriate.
Your DH did tell you about it, as others have pointed out. But the fact that she is starting to drop details about her marriage to her husband and that she calls your her little sister. What's that about? So condescending. Next time she does that, you should laugh and say "No, I'm more like your daughter."
I know how you feel, OP. Easy to say to brush it off. Harder to do.
What did your DH say when he got home?
+1
I agree with the posters who say your DH did the right thing by telling you.
She was probably drunk but even so it was inappropriate. Don't see her as a provider anymore.