Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 21:57     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
The racism and sexism in this thread is off the charts, even for DCUM.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 20:55     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Anonymous wrote:About 10 years ago I was walking down the street when a man stopped me. He introduces him self and told me he'd seen me a few times. He told me I was very beautiful and asked me if he could ask me out. I thanked him and told me I was married. In this case it was not creepy or weird. He was sincere and did not have a weird vibe.

Other times I've been cat called-- my skin crawled.


Still, this bugs me. Who wants to invite someone out based solely on how they look? (Okay, maybe lots of people. But I find it wrong.)
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 20:54     Subject: Re:Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
I don't particularly like it when anyone comments on my appearance. Unless it's someone who knows me well, and I've dressed for an interview or something. You know, where their comment about my appearance might actually be helpful.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 20:53     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
About 10 years ago I was walking down the street when a man stopped me. He introduces him self and told me he'd seen me a few times. He told me I was very beautiful and asked me if he could ask me out. I thanked him and told me I was married. In this case it was not creepy or weird. He was sincere and did not have a weird vibe.

Other times I've been cat called-- my skin crawled.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 20:51     Subject: Re:Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Anonymous wrote:Isn't this the main reason why women spend so much time in front of the mirror each morning?
Compliments just mean it was time well spent.



Ew, you are annoying. And pushing ridiculous stereotypes. My husband spends a lot more time in front of the mirror than i do.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 20:48     Subject: Re:Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Saying Hi or Good Morning to a stranger is inappropriate in this area. So how would a compliment coming from a stranger sound? Even more inappropriate. If we were in the midwest or out west it would be different.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 19:51     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Anonymous wrote:I'm a straight, 34 year old woman, who loves complimenting others. Especially other women. I don't think women genuinely compliment other women enough. So if I'm at Whole Foods and I see someone on w/ a fabulous scarf, I'll tell her it's a great look. Or if I'm at an event and I see someone with fabulous hair or a knockout dress, I'll give her a compliment. My compliments are always sincere and are always met with very sweet gratitude, maybe because women don't do this enough? I just think if you see someone who deserves a compliment, you should be able to give them one sincerely, without being weird.

I gave a compliment to someone at the doctor's office today. She had a radiant smile that was absolutely infectious, and I told her that. Apparently the news she had received wasn't all that happy, and she gave me a light hug and thanked me, saying that turned around her day as she was smiling to avoid crying.

You never know what someone else is going through and if you can make them smile with a sweet compliment, why not?


I'm like you PP. straight 45yo & I love giving (& getting) sincere compliments. I have never had anyone react badly. Everyone seems genuinely flattered as far as I remember.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 19:06     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Ladies: big smile, a kind "why thank you" that conveys a humble nature, while you keep moving forwards.

It's a compliment. That's it!
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 19:05     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Well, I complimented a stranger today, a man, who pulled a big pick up truck towing a trailer between 2 SUV's at a gas station, basically parallel parked his ride in a tight tight space, with zero expesssion and a giant Slurpee in one hand.

It was a sight to behold, and yes, I told him it was amazing.

Invictus
Post 03/22/2017 17:01     Subject: Re:Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
No. I'm a man who loves women and my compliments are always tasteful. I do enjoy seeing them smile. And I've had women compliment me. I graciously thank them. If something more comes out of it, that's fine, too.
Anonymous
Post 03/22/2017 08:57     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Anonymous wrote:The amount of creepiness is inversely proportionate to the complimenter's attractiveness.


Totally this. But less attractive people can counteract the creep factor by literally keeping it moving and not trying to start a convo. Just make eye contact, compliment, break eye contact and keep walking.

But also, I was not raised near any black people really (not black American culture anyway) and my first experiences taught me that the guys are seriously smooth. All men have their charm though. Or not.
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2017 21:33     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
I don't think it is weird or creepy. It is a compliment, you just say thank you and move along.
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2017 17:05     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
The amount of creepiness is inversely proportionate to the complimenter's attractiveness.
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2017 17:02     Subject: Re:Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.



It's called fear of being called a racist.


LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.


I'd only admit this on an anonymous forum but this is not it for me. I feel more comfortable rolling my eyes at or straight up arguing with a white guy I think is being inappropriate but I get scared sometimes if it's another ethnicity, or, I'm embarrassed to admit, a different class. Ie, trailer trash lolling white guy would make me nervous too. If I'm scared I'm less likely to fight back.

I will say that there is a certain kind of black guy who really can give salacious compliments in a way that feels fun and flirty that seems to be almost exclusive to them. I think it's because it's not leering its like they just genuinely enjoy beautiful women, there's no agenda.

For the most part though complimenting women out of the blue is very hard to pull off non creepily so I'd avoid it


Agree to the bolded. I also think that we can agree that cat-calls and obscene verbal harassment was not what was being talked about here.


nah, it's the secret desire of many women to have a bbc experience that precludes them to think of this as rude or creepy. it's ok to admit you're turned on by AA guys complimenting you.


I'm the PP. No this is not it at all. I really don't know how to describe it. It's something about how they just seem delighted to see a pretty lady. This is not universal, I think plenty of guys hitting on me of all ethnicities are creepy AF. This is a really specific thing. And I think it really has to do with feeling literally NO pressure. It's just like they're astounded to see a pretty face and can't help themselves telling you. It's weird.


Stop responding to the guy who keeps bringing up race and racism. It's obvious he's using this thread to fuel his fetish, as evidenced by using porn terms (BBC).
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2017 16:53     Subject: Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?
I'm a woman and I compliment other women for their hair, nails, etc. It's nice for people to hear good things about themselves. However, a man giving a "you look hot" type of look or compliment is never appropriate.